Kateo...I hope you have left DH capable of standing up straight love!
Girls...coming in to check on you all. It has been quiet in here and I am hoping it is because you are all busy ravaging your husbands and making beautiful babies.
AFM- CD22 and ovulated late i think...got a bit confusing. Gave it ever shot we could and still going to make sure we have covered all bases. This is it ladies. My xmas present is coming early! Oh could you imagine??? End of Nov we will have the results we have been waiting for. I will be able to wrap a present for DH under the tree...a POAS. I will tell him that he can open one gift early. Oh it will be perfect. xoxoxoxo
GI! I love your positive attitude and I believe this will give you your dream of having those two big fat lines on the test and your early Xmas present! Fingers, legs and everything else crossable is crossed for you!
Kateo - I didn't realise you were trying this month. How exciting. How are you feeling and how's it all going?
Ladytess - I'm so sorry that it wasn't your month and I can truly sympathise with how you were/are feeling. It's exhausting this ttc game and if someone could just say "in three months you'll be pregnant" it would make it easier but it's the not knowing that kills us!
As for me... we are trying but not trying if you get my drift. Not sure when I o'd or when my AF is due and don't want to know. I have taken the approach that if I have another early miscarriage, I'd rather not know and just think it's a period. Not sure if this approach is good but to be honest, I can't do too many more heartbreaks. So, we'll see. Gi, I might also be adding a little present under the tree!
Big hugs to all and fingers crossed the "silly season" brings BFP's for all!
Powelly- Hun..I get your drift and i hope it is just what has been needed. I am a firm believer that when we are left to our instinct...our mojo comes at the most fertile time anyway. Our bodies and hormones, when left alone, guide us at the right time. We just rarely get to have the peace required to read those moments. I hope this is just what you needed sweet.
Christmas blessings here we come. xoxox Love to all xooxox
Just popping in to let you know that I had a I have had two b/ts now and my levels look really good! I've been quite tired and my BBs are popping already and I had to go and buy new bras yesterday! Sorry it has taken so long to let you know but it has taken a while to sink in. We have told our family and they are thrilled with the news. It's the best Christmas present we could have ever received!
LOL...you have taken a while to tell us...you are only coming up to 5 weeks. Welcome Sploge to this wonderful world of ups and downs, you are already loved more than you know. I bet you feel that love everyday. xx
Cheryl hun that is wonderful news and I wish you a H and H pregnancy. You have got the ball rolling now hun...we will be following you in suit.
Whooo hooooo! I have almost fallen off my fit ball. That is just fantastic. I hope you feel Ryan with you more than ever...now along side his little brother or sister. Will you find out what flavour your bubba is? I can't remember what you have said in the past in regards to that.
Yay...it is Christmas and Santa is a COMING TO TOWN! Bring on the BFPs!!
Thanks Gigi - it still feels a bit surreal but I am sure I will settle into it all, especially with these symptoms I am having! Yes we will find out the flavour as you call it - LOL! And yes I can feel Ryan's presence - I have been having some vivid dreams about the last few days with him, I guess that's natural?
Thanks Powelly - due in late July. My birthday is 15th July, so maybe I'll be in hospital for my birthday. I don't mind as long we have a healthy baby.
WHOOOO HOOOOOO CHEZ CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! I am sooo happy for you. I can certainly understand how it might take a while to sink in. I really am super phsyced for you.
KateO - I hope your off ravaging your Hubby, or at the very least having a fantastic tracking month. Where are you at hun?
GiGi - Once again your positivness jumps out of my monitor and slaps me over the forehead a couple of times... I am so glad I have had at least one coffee. lol I love the idea of Christmas Prezzies for us all.
Powelly - I too get your drift. the whole problem was , I think is that when Matthew died my OB told me we would be Preg by September... now, why would you say something like that? to a grieving mother? maybe it was to make me have some hope. I dont know, but I think its because of this "promise" that I just cant see too far into the future. Its getting more and more hazy, every month I can feel it seeping in, I can feel the "maybe we will not concieve again" seeping in....
AFM - apart from the above? cd19 today.... Ending Ovulating Period (late now I know, thank you mr OPKs) and heading into the tww. I am going to say today is 1dpo, but I will still be covering all basis. Bding is very strained at the moment as we both have the flu.... lol and refuse to kiss each other because of reinfection... lol Not sure how to explain how I am feeling. My shrink believes it is because I had to look after my newborn neice at the start of this month that gave me some comfort, instead of channeling my energy into concieving. I dont know I think its a crock, and she is just spouting words to make me feel better. Although in my heart I am hoping the old wives tale of smelling a newborn baby gets the ol hormones churning...... Truth is I cant help but he hopful but I am tired of the heartache, I am tired of everything. Sorry if I have brought the house down a lil... I just cant find my light this month .
Gigi- you are sounding very positive....good sign I reckon!
Chez- I want some of what you're taking! What super news.......bring on morning sickness, sore boobs and constipation! Then you'll be sure you know your preggas!
Lady-Tess-we lost our precious angels about a month apart. (Ellen 41 weeks 13/1/10) Now I reckon we should have our earth angels together.....lets get on with it! I have some idea of the sadness you are coping with. I reckon the "shrinks" can;t really say anything that helps....basically we are on our own.
Powelly- I too wish I could "go with the flow" but it took 8 years of doing that on and off to get Ellen so I just don't have time for it now. I hope your mojo does the trick for you.
AFM- blood test on Thurs to tell us if I'm pg or not. Currently taking progesterone......pesseries....yuk! My temps are staying fairly high which I understand is good and I have seen the accupuncturist. I am very teary everytime there is discussions about Xmas. I was supposed to be having Xmas with my bubba Ellen. I then wory as a positive attitude helps with getting pg....arrggghhh. Only 3 more sleeps 'till I know but I don't feel pg .......
Girls for a few of you this is your first Xmas with your angels. It is so hard. It will be my second- which i can't believe. Very soon I won't be able to say that she was born last year which for some reason still seems recent to enough people for them to have a glimpse of understanding the heartache we feel every day. I have no idea what this christmas will be like, all I know is that we will have her stocking like we did last year and add a note each day that we will read out on the day...which we will start just the three of us. I still have no desire to watch my nephews and relies get all excited for christmas morning as we should have been. DD would be coming up to 20mths this Christmas. She should be walking, giggling and ripping into the little gifts we would have bought her...sharing it with her cousins. I have no idea when that idea gets any easier. It is just too horrible to dwell on.
I hope that next Christmas will be more bitter sweet with a new little earth angel to share with the world. RIght now it is hard to share our angel DD as not all can accept her as a part of our lives they way we include her. Their loss!
Kate- I hear you when you say 8 years hun. I am a long timer too. I feel the time ticking louder tha never. If one more well meant comment comes my way on what they think we should do- i will hit them over the head. They would never have the stamina or imagination it has taken to get thus far. So I hear you hun. Ellen is a lucky girl to have you. Good luck for 3 more sleeps and I hope you are surprised like Santa has just done the chicken dance, naked at your front door! You will fall pregnant- positive mind or not, when the timing is perfect. You know that deep inside. xoxoxoxo
Tess- I hope that did the trick too hun. I really felt your words when you said you felt like you had another baby taken from you. My rational and irrational brain have played swapsy with me a couple of times. I was looking after my nephew a lot after DD was born. He got quite attached to me and me to him that oneday mum took him off me. Well he was beside himself and it was horrible. I went to my room and cried my heart out. Mum was just both jealous and butting her nose where it was not needed nor wanted. Bless her. She was trying to toughen him up and to break our attachement...not nice for either of us -both suffering separation anxiety of sorts.
What a silly shrink to say that. She mustn't get it at all. And your ob- RIGHT...I would love that prediction! God- how do you spell mussn't... it looks strange. Fingers crossed for you hun. You are not bringing the house down at all. It lifts us to lift you hun. You are perfect- you are heart broken. I was angry- very angry for a long time.I am not so angry now...just broken and I have accepted that. I only get angry every now and then now. You are doing fine- wonderfully in fact. When you can't find your light...stand in ours. Our candle is big enough for a bunch of you. xoxo
CD24...approx 7DPO if calculations are correct. I never truely know until the end of the month. This week i am keeping busy with a function...65 people- a 21st. Needless to say I have no time to be glum this week now- I have to keep it together. Then next week i am making my Xmas stocking for DD. I have also decided to do a stall at the Christmas markets next year....so i will have little projects on all year i think.
We have also booked in for a Medium reading with the lady we have been to twice before. That is my christmas gift from DD and DH and I can't wait.
Love to you all and be back in here soon to check up on you all. xoxoxoxo
Kateo - GOOD LUCK on Thursday! That's so exciting. Don't worry if you don't "feel" pregnant. Most of my friends say they actually felt nothing at all when they were pregnant and for me, it's been so long I can't actually remember. Hopefully you follow Cheryl and give us some fantastic early Christmas news!
Ladytess - it's awfully hard hon and I feel for you. What an idiotic Ob! Is he/she also a physic? I hate it when people do the whole "it won't be long" and "it'll happen next month". It just makes it worse. I found that after my first miscarriage a few months ago, EVERYONE I knew said "you'll be right next time" and I ended up believing it. Well I wasn't and it make it 1000 times harder the second time around.
Cheryl - Still doing the happy dance for you chicka! YAY!
GI - still have every thing crossable crossed! We need some more BFP's!
Well I'm somewhere in the TWW, feeling very exhausted and a bit crampy. I'm always exhausted and got a bit freaked because I got crampy for the week before I got pregnant/miscarried the two times before. I'm petrified but am refusing to POAS until my period is like a month late! It's hard staying sane. I'm desparate to fall pregnant but am also afraid of it being snatched away right away. I feel like I can't let anyone in now and that's really hard. Thank GOD for you girls!
Powelly - We are right with you hun... every godforsaken step of the way. What I love about this thread in particular, is the fact that you just type how you feel and you know there is more chance of someone here "getting it" than anywhere else in the world. Its like the only place where the "other" mums are.
Gigi... this will be my first Christmas without Matthew. And really, I have an excuse, I can "ruck up" as I have a 8 year old aswell. I really really feel for those who lost their firstborn, I do not know where I would be mentally or emotionally if I didnt have him. He hates confrontation and upsetness, so as a mum i go to great lengths to cowboy up in front of him. I have noticed this year he hasnt asked for much. His heart is sad too I know, and there isnt a god damn thing I can do about it. and it is heartbreaking. I love the idea of a stocking for Matthew this year... I am going to make a christmas bobble with his name on it, I did one for my oldest so no reason at all why Matthew cant have one. A function like that sounds like a good distraction. Do you find when things like this crop uo yu tend to THROW everything you got into it... anything but sitting and obsessing.
Kateo - I remember when you first posted. Your story hit me hard, and even though I have not yet posted my story, it is so alike in so many ways. I was a bit of a lurker, was for a long time. But it did take you to bring me out of my shell. I was always a bit of a thread killer on other forums, so I was a bit gun shy. So to you I must say THANK YOU. You gave me the strength to start bonding with the lovely group of girls here. I am crossing everything for tomorrow, try not to be too anxious.
AFM well I am still in a ditch. OPKs still reading positive, three days later??? what does that mean? I am over the hard flu part now but hubby took a turn for the worse last night and i just couldnt do it to him. he is just too exhausted. We will tonight though... I know I will blame missing bding last night if we are not this month. I just dont know anymore. mind you might be TMI but we bd on the fist day of positive opk, and the second (that was hard enough), just not last night. I will opk again this afternoon. It should be gone by now.
I dont have much of a light this month but I am shining what I can for you gals. xx
Hey Beata...China- how cool. Hope you are well hun and thanks for dropping by to smother us in your TWW wishes of luck.
Tess, It is good to dive into something- the function. I hope I won't have my period for it ...so i had better be pregnant.
Yeah we write a little note to put in her stocking each day through december...things we would have bought her...thoughts we had each day and wishes to send her. It is a nice idea rather than her remaining 'unaddressed' over christmas and christmas morning. Sometimes i think -for me, if i don't verbalise or put my thoughts out there...they rumble around in my head only to pop up when they are least wanted. I found that exercise good for us and a way of having our family at Christmas.
Bless your other little boy. It must be bitter sweet to have to 'buck up'. I bet he is worth it, but i can't imagine how hard that might be. You are so braving and loving hun. I learned for a glimpse, a split moment in life how much strength our children give us. It is truely incredible what we would do for them. xoxoxox
P.S. I second Tess's word in regards to the bonds and friendships in here albeit some are fleeting. You can say exactly how you are feeling and you are not judged in anyway, infact- you are understood more than you could hope for.
Thank you ladies, You have got me through some of the most tragic times of my life. I feel less alone having you in my life xoxoxo
Ok I think it just hit me that I'm really really really scared. I so want to be pregnant again but am so petrified that I just can't go through another miscarriage. Especially at this time of year! I know there's never going to be a right time but I'm just so nervous now. I think AF is due early next week so this could be PMT/PMS stuffing with my head. This is torture! Trying so hard to stay busy and keep my mind on other things. Sorry for the quick vent!!
Well I have finally been able to get on Bellybelly without bursting into tears so I feel I can start to share with everyone. 2010 has been a heck of a rollercoaster ride.
Started off great – had a good job – then found out in April, 2010 after 5 years of trying that we were finally pregnant with our 2nd bubba.It was a huge shock as we felt it wasn't gonna happen. We were sooooo excited. Everything progressed fairly well. 13 week ultrasound was great and hubby knew it was a boy!! To make a long story short (as I will maybe eventually put a post about our little man) I had amniotic fluid leaking for 2 weeks – bubba run out of fluid and we lost our little man at 18 weeks 6 days. We were so devasted.....my little girl was shocked as she has begged for a sibling for so long. So the year has got worse from there.....had someone back into my car, my puppy died from a paralysis tick, I lost my job the very next day, my grandad had a stroke all while being very depressed about losing our baby. Bubba boys EDD was the 29th of November, 2010 – so this coming monday. I am trying to be sooooo positive and I really wanted to be pregnant again before his EDD but that isn't going to occur either as AF is almost here.
I have started charting and using Maybe Baby and have just bought some OPK's – so really trying to give this all I've got. FX that 2011 is a much happier year for us. So I am here to join you ladies in this journey. to all!!!
Welcome Lollylegs and sorry you have to be here with us. You will find so much support in here and I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It's cruel having a child taken from you no matter what gestation or age and we all feel the pain.
On a positive note, good luck in your TTC journey and perhaps santa will be good to you like he was one of the other ladies in here (Cheryl). Wishing you a speedy journey and lean on us all you like.
I have had two b/ts now and my levels look really good! I've been quite tired and my BBs are popping already and I had to go and buy new bras yesterday! Sorry it has taken so long to let you know but it has taken a while to sink in. We have told our family and they are thrilled with the news. It's the best Christmas present we could have ever received!
to everyone!
Gigi- you are sounding very positive....good sign I reckon!
So I am here to join you ladies in this journey. 
to all!!!
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