Got a good feeling in my bones that we have a bub on board. Dh and I have a very very good feeling. Oh how we wish to prove it can be that simple. Fingers crossed and fingers crossed for the other girls on TWW atm. I am CD17 and doing my fertility dance! We have spent the morning very cautiously working out EDDs, Names and different functions coming up. I think we have btoh decided to keep things to ourselves for a good while and only tell BB, Little SIL and one friend, so we have a bit of a support network there for the ups and downs sure to follow. Wow, this really feels like we have done it....
Bring it on!
Heading to Byron to enjoy the TWW as much as we can. Only be there for 2.5 days but we will be making the most of it....very very excited. Going to break a bit of the detox and go out for dinner together. Won't be too bad, more or less just no sugar, no pasta and the rest is not too bad. I had to have throat lozengers these last couple of days to try and dull the razor blades i must have swallowed and i am over the sugar already. Amazing! Rarely craving, we are going a bit easier now, no enemas, no dairy still except kefir and no sugar, no meat...but we have had a piece of sour dough here and there now so that is fine. DH has had the odd bit of cheese etc and the odd meal now that is not so strict for business dinners etc. So we are not really trying /doing anything difficult anymore. Still juicing until the cows come home which we are loving. Always been big juicers but not every day. Will be nice to relax and take it easy.
Listen to me rattling on.
Sorry for no persies...I am a little bit flittery today to concentrate on other peoples journeys but please know you are all in heart and i think of you always. xoxo WIshing you all the very best for you, your angels and families. xoxo
Oh Gigi that sounds incredibly promising. What day did you O?
Obviouisly it is intuition only at CD17 but I'm jumping on your bandwagon & will be hoping like crazy your hunch is right.
Enjoy Byron, enjoy letting your detoxed hair down a little & can't wait for the next couple of weeks to speed by.
Hi to everyone else also x
Huge Congratulations Chez!! You must be thrilled. Little Ryan will be watching over his little sister and his mummy and daddy.
Gigi1 - everything is crossed for you. I've always been one to "know". Hoping you're now up the duff
Tess - I understand your reluctance to post in here. I felt weird about it as well but couldnt get myself to post in the preg after loss group either. Take care of yourself. Subsequent pregnancy is sooo hard.
I hope everyone else is well.
I'm afraid I'm really struggling. Not only are we grieving for 2 boys, I'm also losing hope that we'll ever be able to bring home a living baby. Unfortunately, until we have more information about Jude's condition there's not a lot we can do. So I feel like I'm staring as walls wondering what the hell is happening with our life and crying for our babies. I'm lucky if I have a shower some days. If I get the energy, I cook something because then I feel like I've done something productive. But it's only 2 of us and we can only eat so much.
The really crappy thing is it's nearly 3 weeks since Jude died and we're in the count down to Leo's 1st birthday. There's only 40 days between the 2 dates.
People say I'm so strong dealing with all this. I dont feel strong at all. I feel like I'm drowning and that I'm a complete failure or that I'm being punished for something horrible. But there's only so many times you can say you're sad and miserable before people get sick of hearing about it. So I stay home and cry and if I go out I try so hard to look normal. I just keep thinking we should be planning our baby son's first birthday whilst his brother is growing inside me. I'd much rather have that life instead of this one.
Huge Congratulations Cheryl and Big welcome to darling little Isabella- a beautiful name for a very special little girl. Well done to mummy for resting up and making it through the last months. xoxoxo
Mummytotwo- Thank you love, yes it is intuition at this stage but all the balls are in the right court, stars are all in place and hope is hanging on the line. It will be a good month and thank you so much for being on our bandwagon!! Will let you all know asap the final score.
Tashy- Thank you sweet, i am hoping my inutition is on the ball.
Oh my dear friend, i feel your pain and bewilderment. It is horrible to go through this once let along again. If ever you need to tell your's and your boy's story over and over again, here is a safe place, or you can call me anytime. I will listen. I will pm my number to you. Anytime.
You know all too well, the little things each day help you to move forward. One foot infront of the other. Who cares if you have had no shower for the day...one day you will and you know that. One day...whether tomorrow or the next you will want a shower. Just know that you will get yourself through this. You will feel better one day...that day will come. Right now, enbrace and let yourself go. Not a time to hard on yourself in any way. I think you are doing a well but by that i mean, you are eating, you are moving. Try to be true to yourself too. What you have been through is horrendous...truely tragic. You are entitled to feel broken for as long as it takes, you will naturally want to put yourself back together as best you can as time goes on. You are building your new you and that takes time.
Go easy and be gentle. Thinking of you my friend and here if you need anything.
Tashy - you are welcome, about the support. Just glad my unique experiences have some use. I just wanted to add something... when you spoke about not crying, you could have been writing about me. For the longest time, there was no real anguished crying.... and then when it did come, it was overwhelming, but different to the first time. I just checked your tally, and Jude did it! He raised his target, and more. Isn't he amazing. Go gently my dear.
AFM - feeling better physically, but emotionally wiped out. Lots of tears from me lately... I am hoping that it's just being over wrought from the last few weeks and not anything more serious, but all of us here are candidates for pnd.....a bit sobering.... anyway, off to bed for me.
Sorry no more persies from me, but you're in my thoughts.
Sorry, I don't have much energy to do persies tonight, the whicked witch is here and I feel pretty worn out. Just a little hello from me and big hugs all round.
Tash, Gigi couldn't have put into words what I wanted to say any better. The grief for you must be so overwhelming, I would imagine it's a bonus to get through every minute, every hour, every day and so on. I know I've only lost one baby, and cannot imagine losing two, but for me my grief was also very overwhelming and I too didn't have a shower some days, let alone ate or said anything sometimes all day. I felt so broken, so empty, such a failure, I wondered how I would ever pick myself again and faced the world out there. The grief consumed me, but it didn't break me, nor my spirit, nor my determination to keep on going for me, for DF for others. But it did take time hun, and that is what it takes, time. You would know yourself, you no more than pick yourself up as much as you can from losing Leo, and then you're slammed into the ground again. But you will rise again hun, each day you will get stronger and happier, probably doesn't feel like that now, but you will. I'm not saying you will feel stonger or happier or optimistic now hun, I'm just saying you will in time, just to show you hope. I had that hope and I got there, much to the credit to my wonderful psychologist who changed my life, who saved me, who changed my thinking and offered and showed me acceptance of the sometimes cruel but beautiful world we live in. You know you can reach out anytime hun, I'm also in melbourne and would love to meet you, offer a shoulder to cry on, just give me the green light. Otherwise, if your not up to it, you know I am, we are here for you hun, always. Good night hun, and I hope tomorrow, in a small way but in a way regardless, brings a small smile to your face. Big hugs lovely
Can I hop in here for a while. I find it hard talking about TTC with others who do not understand about recurrent miscarriages or stillbirth. We lost Annabelle at 31 wks and in the last 5 years I have had 9 confirmed miscarriages and about 10 chem pgs. I would love for one last time to be bale to get past the 8 wk mark and still have a a heartbeat, even get as far as the NT scan! Our youngest is 2, then we have a 6 yr old, then 18,19 and 27.
Dory big hugs hun.
Tash I am so sorry to read of your two baby boys. To have got so far and then lose them to them angels. I hope you get some answers as to why.
I miscarried on Thursday, I was 8w3d and the scan clearly showed the placenta separating and you could see the blood moving it was that clear then 20 minutes later I miscarried while still in the Drs office filling out paperwork for the D&C. I had to wait 4 hrs but still had the D&C as the miscarriage wasn't quite complete and I had retained tissue causing me to hemorrhage.
I was told I don't have to wait to TTC and due to my age I don't want to wait anyhow. each month is so precious.
hugs from a snow bound mountain lass.. yes in Tassie it does snow sometimes lol.
Jude
Not at all Angelicdragon, i thought i had already replied but it is not here, obviously. So sorry to leave you hanging. Welcome to the thread, I am just sorry it is under such circumstances. Wow you have been through so much over the years and again recently. You are a brave woman going after your dreams, for that i have admiration. Hope you find this thread warm, welcoming and supportive. Best of luck and hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy on the way. xoxo HM
There have been so many babies born just recently I am getting all names and genders mixed up in my head. It is wonderful so many woman are finding success after such hard journeys.
Well AFM- I am CD22. Brave BTs yesterday that have been a long time coming. Got visitors coming this afternoon so better not stay and chat...lots to do. Fingers crossed for me and all the other ladies out there ttc. My heart with you all in the throws of early grief and the grief we live with forever.
hi girls, how are we all?
Gigi i wish i could have ur confidence hun, you're so amazing
plodding along here, silly me did a hpt yesterday and this morning 9/10 dpo and both morning the faintest (and im talking barely) line has come up twice, feeling like it did last month so im not going to test now until af is due (weds) just in case things turn sour again.
Other than that, 5 months today since we said goodbye to our boy, feels like just yesterday and a million years ago all at the same time. Have been missing him and thinking about him lots lately.
Misss u all and baby dust to everyone
xxxx
Gigi I am so sorry I didn't read your post properly about feeling good about this cycle. Bring it on Universe!!!!!!!!!!! I would love nothing more than see you UTD hun, that would make my whole year!!!!!! GL sweetie, I have everythink crossed for you darling FX
Angelicgragon, you didn't scare anyone away!!! you're so funny
Dory, hope you're in a better head space hun, thinking of you sweets
Skybie, I have everything crossed for you too lovely, would absolutely love to see a BFP for you too darl
OK, sorry ladies been having a beer while cooking dinner, I pressed post instead of preview, so we keep going (sorry the beer has affected me a wee bit, hehehehe)
Tash, thinking of you too sweets, hope every day is somewhat easier for you. Big hugs xx
Cheryl, I hope you're enjoying you lil princess
Big helo to anyone I missed, will come back for more persies.
Skybie, You are kidding me...this sound very promising, I have all my fingers crossed for you love. I hope the next few days bring you a BFP in true style....two big fat dark lines. Good Lukcy sweety. If is any consellation, I tested positive on CD26 with DD- 11DPO.
Miss gorgeous B, Thank you for such enthusiasm hun. I appreciate it with all my heart. We are certainly hopeful in this household and we have continued to live as though it is a reality.
While in Byron, we bought a little amber teething necklace for this new baby coming into our lives who we feel is very close right now. It is a nice feeling...trying not to let fear come into it. trying.
seems now it is every time I try and get back something happens, I get called away etc etc.. I now have a complete series of IC tests that go from BFN to light bfp to dark bfp then back to white bfn. If every anyone wants a study on how long you get a bfp for after a m/c I have the sticks to prove it. Both times I did tests after a m/c it showed it takes 10 days to get back to bfn. OPKs have been white but now starting to get a line so it fits in with the timing for after I lost Joey then conceived Ethan.
Has anyone else noted how when yo uare pg you can eat/drink things you never normally do then can't after you m/c. The short time I was pg I could drink apple and mango fruit juice and also the apple, banana and coconut fruit juice mix. But I had a glass yesterday it tasted foul like it used to. I guess that particular baby liked mango.
We are snwoed in down here. I know in USA they are sued to deep snow but here it stops the city to a standstill. We have just been watching the movie Arctic Blast too which was filmed in our fair city of Hobart... so rather apt with all the snow outside. No school again tomorrow so we can all sleep in ...
Judy, it sounds like you have a house full atm. Hope the sunshine is still there to enjoy all the snow. I love snow- you will never find me sick of it. So much fun to be had. Good luck for this cycle as you get busy with the business end of things. xoxo
AFM- CD25 and going well. I have not done Yoga in over a week and missing it terribly. The little flu i had took that away but we are back on deck now and hoping for a good session. Might have to stretch considerably to touch my toes today. Going to do some work on the bathroom tomorrow!! Yay. Kind of looking forward to it.
A bit of doubt creeping in for the result of this cycle but trying to keep in mind I have another up my sleeve if outcome is not what we hoped. Of course did a HPT yesterday on cd24...BFN but hoping it is too early. If i try and hold out, there still might be a chance.
Anyway holding onto hope in this house. xoxoxo to all. HM
Hi everyone! I have been quietly stalking but no persies today.. I just wanted to pop in and spread some I am doing well, 14wks now, was supposed to have a cervical cerclage today but it got put back til Friday. I am nervous, but just keeping my fingers crossed everything stays good. I'll keep silently stalking you all and fingers crossed for some more BFP's!!
FX
I am doing well, 14wks now, was supposed to have a cervical cerclage today but it got put back til Friday. I am nervous, but just keeping my fingers crossed everything stays good. I'll keep silently stalking you all and fingers crossed for some more BFP's!!
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