I have tried cutting his feeds shorter but he still works himself up as he wants to relatch again.

There is no chance of getting dp to help and tbh he doesn't handle DS crying very well and I would have to step in as I don't like the way he would try and resettle him

So I just thought I would update... dp went fishing a night earlier then planned (last night) and DS woke like clock work at 12 am. I went in and just cuddled him to sleep and told him that boo was empty and asleep. He went back to sleep and mostly grizzled but didn't work himself up. I slept with him as usuall. Unfortunately I don't have a clock in the room but I remember DS woke at least another 2 times so on the 3rd wakeup I thought it would have to at least be after 4am.... and as I thought I would take it slow by putting him off and cutting out the first feed or so I fed him.

I went to the toilet and found out it was only 2.30 am but he slept through to 5 am and as I didn't want to get up for the day I fed him then back to sleep

We will see what tonight brings, plan on doing the same thing... cuddle him back to sleep provided he doesn't work himself up too much. Try that a for about 4 wakeups before feeding him.