already having wedding problems

**renee84** · October 25th, 2007, 08:33 AM

Ok basically I want my dad and my step dad to both walk me down the aisle, I see no difference as they are both my dad. So I told my dad this, well asked him if he would be offended if I did this, then he goes really quiet and starts being rude like "well if thats what you want then..." and then "I will have to see if I can do it..., let me think about it" what on earth does that mean, if he can do it? Is there a law against it, or is he jealous. I understand he might be a bit uncomfortable but basically from the ages of 12-18 he really had nothing to do with me and my step dad was always and still is there for me.I mean it's my wedding and I want them to both be there. I know my dad probably won't mention it again which means I am going to have to bring it up yet again

Sorry rant over lol

***charmalea*** · October 25th, 2007, 08:42 AM

awww .. hun your dad is jealous .....

tell him its what you want because its your wedding and your big day , and its your wish to include them both....

sometimes weddings can be bitter sweet , i had major issuses with not wanting my dad to walk down the isle with me , but in the end if it made him happy i let him ...

so maybe he will see it will make you happy and hopefully oblige ..

**Astrolady** · October 25th, 2007, 08:45 AM

Can you have them do half each ?? Like one of them walk you into the church/park and half way then the other "give you away" they can both respond to the priest/celebrant when asked who gives you away

Love

**briggsy's girl** · October 25th, 2007, 09:51 AM

i think your dad is probably a little put out that you want to share the moment with your step dad - but being that it is YOUR day and you obviously have a lot of time for your step dad, i think your dad will just have to accept it

you don't need to "bring it up" again - you have asked once, and it's out there - you can't have your day held to ransom over your dad's response - make your arrangements with your step dad and then go back and say "ok, this is what is happening" - if he respects you as his daughter, he'll fall in with your plans (even if he whinges a little in the process!)

it's damn hard to make everyone happy all of the time - and this is one of those occassions where it isn't about making THEM happy - it's about making YOU and your partner happy - and THEY should be bending over backwards to make it a perfect day for you

congratulations on your engagement hun - hope your wedding comes together to be the perfet day that you've been dreaming of

**Muppity** · October 25th, 2007, 10:04 AM

Oh sweetheart - I know exactly how you feel. I am getting married in one week and we are having a private ceremony with just two friends as witnesses because there were too many hassles with DP's family and if i heard "I won't come if so and so is coming" one more time I was going to scream! Funnily enough we haven't even told them about the wedding and I am sure that some still think that there will be an invitation comign in the mail soon.

But back to your issue. I can sort of see it both ways. You have two dads in your life but eveyr father has dreams of giving his little girl away.

I say that you have raised it with him and it may just take a little time for him to get used to the idea. I would say just let it settle for a while.

Another option would be to let one walk you down the isle and the other to have the first dance after the bridal waltz.

I hope that it all comes together and is the perfect wedding day that you want too

**avanliamsmum** · October 25th, 2007, 10:06 AM

I can understand your dad being a bit upset about it, but he's got to realise your step dad was there for a large chunk of your life too. When it comes down to it, its your wedding, your decision. Your dad should respect that.

**LisaBear** · October 25th, 2007, 10:24 AM

i think youve done the right thing!! you have planted the idea and now just let him stew about it for a while...
i manages to get my dad i nto a catholic church and walk me down the aisle even tho hes a Wiccan.. just by tellign him it was my day and if he wanetd to be a part of it then he had to do certain things.. fairs fair!!