Anyone else never had a baby shower?

[Rouge]

Glad to hear you're doing it yourself! The big girl did her own

I dunno N2L I've thrown heaps of baby showers, been to heaps and had one for DS. They can be lots of fun. They can also be really trashy. It depends on the scenario. The big girl had one at her beaus mum's place and all the family came. They used it as an opportunity to give gifts before bub arrived as their family is all spread out. Lucy's mum is having a welcoming party for their side of the family post bubs birth so their family can celebrate too. And from what I understand showers have been big in both families for decades. So I don't think it's not done. But women only showers are dying out. For sure.

[nothing2lose]

pity parties are no good if you can't drink.

That's true. But there's always chocolate

[SunnyRain]

Damn, reading this has now made me feel bad that no one organised anything for me. It never actually occurred to me that my mum and sisters didn't do anything, but now I've just realised my oldest sister organised a shower for my other sister when she was pregnant and she had a naming ceremony for both her kids, but me? Nothing. Wow, what had never bothered me or even occurred to me is now eating me. Can I go back to blissful unawares?

What did bother me a little bit was my mother's group friends. First woman who got pregnant a 2nd time had her own little party she organised, which was cool. Then another woman and I were pregnant with our 2nds and neither of us had anything. Then when the 4th woman got pregnant again, suddenly another member of the group decided to organise a baby shower, which left me a bit stumped why no one did anything for me and the other woman who was pregnant at the same time. I just found it really weird but it didn't upset me because I wasn't the only one left out. Any way, they had all been really generous and given me great presents when dd was born, so I know they care about me.

So the moral is, if you really want a baby shower, play it safe and organise it yourself because people are weird.

[myturn]

I could just throw it myself, but I don't want the whole 'omg she's throwing herself a baby shower, what a *****' thing. I don't even want presents, I just want a group of people who like me to sit around with me and eat yummy things and be happy that another little girl is on the way

then do it! and just write on the invitations "no presents"..... and call it a baby celebration! The last chance, prior to being overwhelmed with another mouth to feed, for you to have a party!

I don't think people will think it's weird... my sister planned her own kitchen tea (I thought it was a dumb idea to have one... but mum wanted her to...) and she even planned all the games and ran them herself... nobody even thought it was weird

A baby shower is the one thing I DO want... didn't have an engagement party (I thought that was a waste of time, money AND all about presents).... but I think a baby shower... while it IS about the presents () is also about celebrating it, and I LOVE buying presents for others baby showers, so.... I figured people who don't like buying gifts will buy something small anyway, and I probably won't even notice if they don't buy one at all!

anyway, my suggestion... just do it! and enjoy it! and don't even think about what others might be thinking... after all... you cannot, no matter what anyone says... read their mind.....

[myturn]

because people are weird.

to true!


oh... and it appears that while I was writing my long winded post... i forgot to read the rest of the replies.... der..... I'm glad you are going to do it

[TeniBear]

I organised both of mine (Ianto's obviously didn't happen). You were at the one for Amelia, remember how much I hated it? I'm definitely not saying you'll hate yours, you know my reasons why I was miserable, but it was an experience I don't want to repeat Next time, even if I'm ultimately calling the shots, someone ELSE is organising. I am not inviting most of my family. I will only have people there who are supportive of my plans. And I will NOT have it on a 40 degree day!!

FWIW, I loved your blessingway with Miss I, even though I was the only person who was there Nice and small and intimate... It was beautiful.

[HotI]

i organised my own too. only female family and a few friends invited. i organised a few games, but then got my sister to run them. it was probably a bit lame, but i had a good time anyway.

I would have loved a blessingway, especially for DS, but my real life friends aren't really into that sort of thing - most wouldn't know what it was. would love to have been comfortable enough to get my belly henna'ed.

have fun!

[Cassius2]

I could just throw it myself, but I don't want the whole 'omg she's throwing herself a baby shower, what a *****' thing. I don't even want presents, I just want a group of people who like me to sit around with me and eat yummy things and be happy that another little girl is on the way

Dude. that is the ONLY way that i have EVER gotten a baby shower/celebration lol. I guess i am sad.

I am totally devastated that what with the preterm labour threats etc that i havent had time to organise something. this time around i wanted something smaller and intimate and just a kind of 'sharing circle' between women ITMS. but yeah, just havent had a chance and definitely no one else that would organise one for me lol. funnily enough i find it weirder to organise my own birth blessingway than to organise a tradition baby shower...

I *think* that what i will do (I still live in hope that i can get my A into G and organise something for the weekend lol) in the coming weeks is organise with my 2 girls to have a wee paint party where I will draw a pregnant lady and the baby and they can go sick on it with some paints and then I can hang them up in my birth space to gaze and zone out with during labour. i really want to include them in this celebration and will be a nice way to do something meaningful but still special for this baby...

[Lisa]

I never had one. My family have thrown them for my sisters but never for me which was hard, especially for my last pregnancy where we were 6 week apart :-(

I have promised my DD's that I will throw baby shower or blessing ways for them.

[Livinthedream]

Didn't have one, don't regret it, usually don't go to ones I am invited to.
I figure what, will all the kids parties, concerts, playgroups and full time work, my weekends are already full enough.
I like to buy something for mum and bubs after the birth, take a cake, have a coffee, shoot the **** one on one.
KWIM
Hope you get the day you want though PZ.

[Sunny Love]

Initiated and planned my own here, no one can host a party as perfect as I. The beauty these days is there are NO rules, do whatever YOU want.
Funnily though I didn't have one for DS, because I felt a bit guilty about being preggers again so soon

Sorry not much help, but wanted to encourage you to have one if you feel you do. xx

[feeb]

Haven't had one for either DS. Have only been to 2. Both were nice just girls sitting around chatting and eating!!
I think its either a thing your circle of friends have or don't know right or wrong. Maybe if more of my friends had them I would have maybe had one but I did see lots of small group of friends for get togethers before baby born.

[Jellyfish]

Didn't have one with either, never really thought about it lol. Haven't been to one although have been invited to a couple I haven't been able to make it for whatever reason.

[RhiChiChi]

Didn't have one with my DD - I think my sister half heartedly asked if I wanted one but I said no, so didn't have one and given this is my second child never thought to have one as I have alot of things I kept from DD, so don't need a baby shower for gifts. Might have a dinner before bubs is born but it will be with just gfs.

[Tinks]

I didn't have one and have never been to one.

[Cherished]

Hi PZ, it's not a stupid thing to be emotional about at all. I didn't have one for DS and just thought I'd have one with my 2nd but now it doesn't look like there will be a 2nd baby and that means no baby shower! I had it all planed out in my head too.

[Trillian]

I think it's a very valid thing to feel upset about it. We all have our own views on the matter and some things mean more to us than they do to others. Personally, I have never had one and I don't regret it and TBH, the idea of it kinda ****s me - I'd much rather buy something for Mum and bubs once the baby is here, not do it first. Maybe its a silly way to think and probably even a bit negative/superstitious but I think it's better to wait. I do love the idea of a blessingway however, but they are far different to a mainstream babyshower.

[fionas]

Never had one, never been to one. Just. Not. My. Thing.

Totally not weird organizing your own so I say go for it!

FWIW, I banned visitors in hospital and got a girlfriend to organize a high tea at her place on the way from the hospital (city) to home (country).

I really enjoyed welcoming DD2 to the world with my closest friends, eating yummy sandwiches and scones and not in my jim jams.