Just from a different perspective, being the one who has to choose which parent to call at times.... I often find if I call the father, I am told to call the mother.... More often than not. Also often parents are not logical about who they list as the emergency contact, and they may put things in the "wrong" order....

So while I totally agree that it seems wrong, society as a general rule hasn't moved on from the idea that women are primarily the caregivers...

Personally I'm not totally bothered by that, but if I was given different information from a school or a parent I would contact the parent I was told to - whoever it was. I think that's the issue, kind of understandable that people might assume, but if told differently they should listen. And certainly no one should be judged for their choices - whether it is working or not, male or female.