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Thread: Babies Born December 2005

  1. #109

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    That's true Kate, could be freezing to death at 4am!! And hopefully they will be sleeping through by then!!!
    Can't believe your NYE experience, shocker!! I went and saw the fire works about 4 years ago at the harbour and it was nice but it's not my scene. Im not a huge fireworks fan. We get them ALL the time here, the last ones being for Aussie Idol!!!
    I am just not a huge NYE fan full stop. Because it's built up to be such a huge night, mine always seem disappointing, so I guess being stuck home is not so bad. Tilly is staying at mums and just walking down the bottom of her street to see the 9pm fireworks. She doesn't like them though, and gets scared, so mum usually takes her home early. My sister and nephew will be there too. My sister is good and is due in 12 weeks!! A little cous for Coco. I think she's having a Zara!! She hasn't fully decided on the name, but it's a girl!
    My new years resolution is that Im going to go out EVERY day (on days under 30 degrees) for a walk with Coco, and whoever wants to come. I just want to get a bit fit, and make myself get some fresh air. THat's the only resolution I have!!
    Anyone got any resolutions??
    I hope everyone else is coping, it's so quiet in here. Im sure you're prob all trying to get a nap, or spend time with your bubba. I spend too much time with mine, so I jump on here when ever she nods off!!
    I've also managed to read a book this week (all while feeding her) and DH and I watched most of the series "band of brothers" while Tilly was at the inlaws!!Makes feeding more exciting!!
    xoxoox


  2. #110

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    That's true Kate, could be freezing to death at 4am!! And hopefully they will be sleeping through by then!!!
    Can't believe your NYE experience, shocker!! I went and saw the fire works about 4 years ago at the harbour and it was nice but it's not my scene. Im not a huge fireworks fan. We get them ALL the time here, the last ones being for Aussie Idol!!!
    I am just not a huge NYE fan full stop. Because it's built up to be such a huge night, mine always seem disappointing, so I guess being stuck home is not so bad. Tilly is staying at mums and just walking down the bottom of her street to see the 9pm fireworks. She doesn't like them though, and gets scared, so mum usually takes her home early. My sister and nephew will be there too. My sister is good and is due in 12 weeks!! A little cous for Coco. I think she's having a Zara!! She hasn't fully decided on the name, but it's a girl!
    My new years resolution is that Im going to go out EVERY day (on days under 30 degrees) for a walk with Coco, and whoever wants to come. I just want to get a bit fit, and make myself get some fresh air. THat's the only resolution I have!!
    Anyone got any resolutions??
    I hope everyone else is coping, it's so quiet in here. Im sure you're prob all trying to get a nap, or spend time with your bubba. I spend too much time with mine, so I jump on here when ever she nods off!!
    I've also managed to read a book this week (all while feeding her) and DH and I watched most of the series "band of brothers" while Tilly was at the inlaws!!Makes feeding more exciting!!
    xoxoox

  3. #111

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    Happy Saturday afternoon to you all!

    I popped in earlier to post but then the board when down a short while ago....good thing I hadn't had a chance to start writing anything!

    We ventured out the shops this morning and because we were there by 9am, we managed to score one of about 12 parent's parks in the entire shopping centre. Undercover and right near the entrance to the part of the shops we wanted!

    Maddy was sooooo good this morning. She slept the entire time we were gone, from about 8:30am when I finished feeding her through til 11:30am when we got home, with only a small grizzle in the car. We went with the intention to get to Medicare and get her added to our card...we have her first GP appointment on Wednesday.

    I had filled out the forms for the baby bonus/maternity allowance/family tax benefit; and brought them along just in case. Medicare now have a single teller representing the Family Assistance Office. Thanks to this being open on a Saturday morning; all of our paperwork is now in; so hopefully it won't take long until it is all processed!

    Night-times are not any better, although I still swear by the 'Infants Friend' drops for her wind - even if the midwife did tell me off for using them. I didn't really care much for her opinion either - she advised me to adapt Maddy to nighttime by feeding then nappy change then bed. No talking to her when she's down for bed, no music, no lights and then letting her cry herself to sleep. I don't agree with this method for my child, especially when she is only a week old.

    I can't believe the weather you southerners (particularly Kate & Meg) are having! OMG....it's probably mid-30s here in Qld (and that's bad enough) but I couldn't imagine the 43 degrees you have predicted for tomorrow!

    Nothing much planned for tonight...have been invited to a NYE bbq at a close friend. We're going to pop by for an hour or so and play it by ear. Maddy doesn't seem bothered by trips out and about; nor does she have enough of a sleeping pattern in the evening to be disrupting.

    P.S - Small RANT! :fuming: :fuming: :fuming: Why is it that certain businessmen with their fancy executive models of cars feel it is their godgiven right to take carparks reserved for parents because they can't find a carpark undercover? We were leaving this morning when I saw a guy in a fancy car do a lap past us (complete with no baby seat in back, but plush sheepskin seat covers instead!) and I predicted to my DH that he would be back.

    Sure enough, we were still getting Maddy sorted in the car when he pulls up beside us and just sits there waiting for our park. Meanwhile, the HUGE sign behind us in bright colours says 'Reserved for Parents with prams only'. I spent five minutes glaring at him, which he blatantly ignored and then sure enough; he backs into the car park we were leaving. In the 50mtrs between that and the exit to the shopping centre car park; we passed no less than 3 vehicles clearly with very young children searching for car parks! That man had no qualms about forcing them out into the sun, to walk with young children into the shopping centre because HE didn't think he should have to follow the signage. I was FUMING! It was 11:00am, building up to extreme heat and he expected to be able to take whatever carpark he wanted.

    Apologies for the rant...just couldn't believe the gall of that guy!

  4. #112

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    Beck, it PEEVES me too!! i never park in parents with prams unless of course I have a baby, but when other people do with no kids I fume. It's sooo inconsiderate and SELFISH.
    Beck, that midwife is CRAZY who told you to let Maddy cry herself to sleep, that's really awful. There is no way newborns can do controlled crying. I also can't believe she told you off about the wind drops. WHAT THE... so many mums use them early on, I certainly did as did alot of women on bb!! (and friends of mine). Sometimes the advice we're given is so dodgy, you wonder how come these people have jobs.
    It is a nightmare when they don't sleep at night, but we just have to deal with it I guess, it won't be forever. I am finding with Coco, that I have to have her in our bed and I have to feed her to sleep. We've learnt these things in the last 4 weeks, but it's ok, as long as she does sleep I don't mind where or how. She's also a tummy sleeper which Im not happy about, but otherwise she wouldn't sleep (and she is next to me, so I check on her constantly).
    I hope she will get a routine, but in the meantime, I take it as it comes and hope that one night she'll sleep better!!!!!!!!! I know with Tilly it didn't happen for 8 months, but after being pregnant for that length of time (that I knew about) my sleep was so crap, I can handle it!!!
    I've crapped on again too much. Will let you all go. I sms'd leanne today and haven't heard back, hopefully that's good news!! xoxo

  5. #113

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    :wave:

    Are infant's friend drops the same thing as Infacol? After last night I just got my first lot. It says for one month and over, but the hospital said it was ok. They also told me to get some Coloxyl Drops for her constipation, but they dont make them anymore Ive rang every chemist in NSW I think! The gripe water seems to make her poop regularly though, so thats ok, its just her wind. I feel sort of bad putting this stuff into her system, but its freaking 2005 and the things that are on the shelves are designed to help our babies, not hinder them. I find I only get negative comments from older women. You know, the older women who still think smoking doesnt do you any harm? And they smoked when they were pregnant and there is nothing wrong with their kids *cough cough* but ohhh no, smoking is ok, just no medicines lol Anyway Im hoping they work and give Jasmine a better night tonight. Im pretty well rested though, and considering its NYE and Ive successfully managed to dodge every party invitation, Im sure I can stay up a few hours lol. Im glad my friends are having separate parties, I told each of them I was going to the the others! Bugger that, Im staying home in my pjs under my a/c! Its still got to be atleast 37 degrees outside. I just took out the rubbish and almost choked on the thick hot air. But in my house, its a cool dehumidified 22 degrees!

    Did anyone get the photo package of their babies while they were in the hospital? I ordered them, the lady took Jasmines pictures but I still havent received them She told me I would have them before the new year. Im dying to see them, and for $115 they better be good! I always think all babies look the same in those photos so I cant wait to see mine. I just wish they would arrive.

    I agree about the controlled crying on a new born. How the hell do you do that, and why would anyone even want to? Some midwives really do give **** advice. In the hospital, one of them said to me "Never give her water. Not even boiled cooled water. Water is bad. There is nothing good about water and babies" So I didnt. I didnt tell anyone, until the Community midwife came and told me to give her a little bit of water, especially in this heat. She couldnt believe someone told me not to give her water! She would be really dehydrated if I didnt! The little bit she has in between feeds makes all the difference too.

    Ohhhhhh I wonder if Leanne is in labour? HOW COOL to be the first baby of the year, or even the last! I bet something is up because I usually hear straight back from her! Im all excited.

    And with the pram parking guy, I would have said something LOL! Yep I still have some rage left in me. I was sitting in a parking space the other day because I was on the phone, and this MORON guy was waiting for the spot, but I thought naaa Im not driving while IM on the phone, he can wait, so he got agro and started beeping the horn. I opened up the car door, got out, stood up gave him the finger and then pointed to my phone. Then even when I was off the phone, I took my time and made him wait. Im such a classy lady PMSL I laughed all the way home.

  6. #114

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    Did you ladies see my post from yesterday? I passed on a message from Leanne as to her situation as at Thursday. She's still waiting...although I'm hoping you're right and she is in labour now. They're not even booking an induction until her appointment next Thursday; I guess by that point she'll be around 10days+ over.

  7. #115

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    Happy New Year!!!!!!!!
    I sms'd Leanne yesterday and she was not in labour!! Said induction is booked for thursday!
    What a shocker sleep!! There were no parties (apart from teh 9pm and midnight fireworks) everything was quiet but Coco wouldn't sleep. I am zonked now and my back is killing (she slept on my tummy when she finally slept). She dozed off at 5pm but woke straight up and it took until 10pm to get her to sleep (she'd been awake since 3pm) then she woke at 1.30pm and then stayed awake for an hour or so and then semi slept until now (9am) with lots of pushing noises and feeds. I am so over this crappy sleeping!!
    How do you give them the infacol drops? I gave her Braures colic relief last night and she slept but I don't think it relieved the pain. I need something else. We've also tried gripe water, but it's too hard to give to her, has to be in water and she won't drink it. How do you give Maddy infacol Beck?
    It's after nights like this that I get depressed, but I think it's more just frustration and tiredness. Not that we ever have good nights. I think I posted about 4 days ago, telling Beck that I can rely on feeding coco to sleep and I know that she will eventually fall asleep in her cot for 3-4 hours. I spoke too soon as she has not slept in her cot for 3 days now. I am pretty certain she won't go back into it until I have been to tresillian (this happened with DD, took 8 months). So our cot is now just a storage area. She absolutely wants NOTHING to do with it! What a bummer. I was so pleased at about 2-3 weeks when she'd put herself to sleep. She won't do that at all now, I HAVE to feed her to sleep. AAGGGRR.
    Anyway, thems the breaks, I guess they are just little bubbies and probably would sleep perfectly if they knew how!!
    How was everyone's new year??? Rach and Mel, how are you? it's been a while. And Tiggy, are your bubs home yet?? xoox

  8. #116

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    Bummer on the crappy sleep last night Meg! DH & I were so zonked, we don't remember the night. I do THINK Maddy actually slept better than she has....a few times I woke up with her asleep on my chest with my boob hanging out! *LOL*

    Because the Gripe water etc said 'from 1 month', I bought 'Infants Friend' as it says you can give it to them from birth. I don't care what that midwife said...DH & I both think it's helped heaps with her wind. It still annoys her but she's not all tucked up and crying from pain now.

    I bought a dropper at the same time and we give her 5-10 drops after each feed (or sometimes every 2nd feed) in her mouth. She likes the taste so she just licks it off her lips.

  9. #117

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    Oh, Im so excited. Coco has fallen asleep on her own!!!!!!!! I decided to put the snuggle bed in teh cot and it did the trick. Obviously she finds the cot totally uncomfortable and I can't blame her!! Anyway, it gives me hope that at least she can still fall asleep!! Of course, we're going out in half an hour, but that can't be helped!!
    Beck, Im going to try the infant drops. We didn't see them when looking originally. We got the colic relief that can be used from birth, as can the gripe water, but it sounds like yours is easiest, putting the drops on the tongue after a feed, definitely getting some tomorrow.
    I managed to have an afternoon nap. DH got coco to sleep in the pram and I had a sleep. Feel alot more human. Tilly is at inlaws which is where we have to go tonight, to pick her up and have dinner. At least their place is air con. It has reached 45 degrees in syd. AWFUL. I am sooooooooooooooo glad we got the air con!!!
    xoxoxox

  10. #118

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    Hello.
    I haven't been on much, I rarely get time to myself and if I do I usually try and sleep. Otherwise I come on here but can't seem to think of anything to say, but I will give it a go today. It will probably be a big whinge though.

    Logan and I flew to Sydney on Thursday and we're now at my Mum's house near Gosford on the Central Coast. It's so hot here, and humid! At least in Mudgee the heat was dry so it didn't seem so bad. Plus MIL had a nice AC in the loungeroom. The AC at Mums house is at the end of the hallway and doesn't seem to do anything except cool down the hallway a little, but doesn't help any of the rooms. At least the pets like it though, they lay all up the hallway so they're cool. I swear the AC is almost as old as I am. I am being such a whinger today. I'm really wishing I hadn't moved here and everything is getting me down. I'm so sick of moving and I wish that there was some chance DF and I will be able to own a house some time in the future, but it looks like we may just have to rent forever

    My breasts are so sore, there is shooting pain going through them and feed time makes me want to cry (and some times I do) because my nipples hurt so bad. The Midwife that saw me on Wednesday said Logan is biting my nipples because I had been expressing and giving him bottles sometimes and he's confused about what he's supposed to do. She showed me a way that is supposed to make him open his mouth more, but I guess nobody told him that because he won't do it. If I manage to put as much of my nipple in as I'm supposed to, he refuses to feed. I feel like I have ruined it all. We did so well in hospital and now it's all just horrible. The good thing is he gained 320gms in a week, the midwife said he's thriving and is a very bright, alert and strong little baby. She called me a Jersey Cow though because my milk flows so quickly. I think that is also why he's biting me, because the flow is too fast for him (even when I try and express before a feed to try and slow the flow like I had read some where). He pushes my nipple out a bit with his tongue and bites the end, my nipples have gone purple.

    So yeah, everyhing is getting me down. But as much as I whinge, I still feel that Logan is so amazing and I love him so much.

    Sorry for whinging so much, I hope things are going better for everyone and all the best for the new year

  11. #119
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    Oh Mel,

    I'm so sorry that you are having such a hard time of it all.

    You must know that you haven't ruined anything. Breastfeeding is hard and society paints a very pretty picture of cherubic babies sucking on these wonderfully pert breasts! The truth is it takes at least six weeks to establish any kind of routine. FOr most women, it is messy, sometimes painful
    Are you keeping up with the BF or are you switching to bottle or are you doing both? Whatever you do, it has to be right for you and Logan.

    Are you on the coast for good now? Have you moved there? Where abouts are you, if you don't mind me asking?

    Are the girls from Central Coast Health seeing you? Have they linked you in with any services?

    The reason I ask is that I work as a midwife for cch. If you need ANY help at all, let me know. I know you don't know me but you sound so very down and I know how hard it all is. You can email me any time, if you like. [email protected]

    You vent all you want. It's 48 where I am, so am feeling the awful hot humidity too.

    Hugs to you.

  12. #120

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    Oh Mel...I'm hearing you. I've just been sitting on our bed blubbering all over DH for the past half an hour. I'm just not coping with the breastfeeding thing either....Maddy wants to feed ALL of the time and my body (specifically my breasts) just can't cope. She feeds normally at the start and then wants to keep going; and I can tell half of the time she is just comfort sucking. The problem is she just rips at my nipples; I don't get a break to sleep and I'm totally knackered.

    I can't get her to accept a dummy of any size, so I can't even pacify her for short periods. I've tried expressing so that DH can help me with feeds to give me a break; but after several attempts I still can't get the pump to work properly.

    What scares me the most is that last night DH & I were so tired with the lack of sleep, we both don't remember half the night. I'm so scared I'm going to hurt her, because I'm literally falling asleep whilst feeding her and wake up later with her hanging off my lap.

    Oh my god, I'm crying as I say this but am I bad mother if I'm considering just switching her to formula feeds so that I can cope? I honestly believe that my milk is better for her, but god I just can't cope with this all. She's only a week old, but I want to just curl up in a corner and cry at the thought that it might take another four weeks or so to get her settled into her feeding properly.

    DH is supportative and says if I feel I can't cope, he's happy for us to use formula. I don't know why but it just feels so wrong...I'm disappointed in myself for not being able push through this all!

  13. #121

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    Oh Bec!!! {{{{{{{{{huggles}}}}}}}}}}}}

    This is so hard!!! I so know where you're coming from!!! I wish I were there to help out. Firstly - you're not a bad mother for being at your wits end (well I hope not... 'cos that would make include most mum's at one time or another - especially when it comes to establishing breastfeeding).

    I've been exactly where you are now, and a few things helped me....

    1) the breastfeeding association phoneline - there is someone there 24/7 and they were fantastic with me blubbering away on the other end of the phone (or there's the child healthline - they're great too)

    2) which breast pump have you got?? Is it the Avent one?? It took me a while to figure it out too...have you tried putting it all together while it's wet? it seals much better that way, and make sure the little white bit is in just right - it's a temperamental thing.

    3) nipple sheilds. the breastfeeding assoc don't recommend them at first, but they saved my nipples from being completely minced, and if it's the difference between being able to bf and not, i think it's worth a try.

    4) If she is just sucking for comfort, try breaking the suction and giving her your finger instead. I suspect that if it's just a comfort sucking thing, even putting her on formula won't help unfortunately. Give her a good half an hour or so on the breast and then take a sanity break.

    5) If all else fails with the breast pump, go to the chemist or local ABA and rent an electric one - they are so great - you can sit there and pump away without lifting a finger - I went to sleep with the one at the hospital. It's also much harder expressing in the first couple of months (getting enough milk out). Now I can get 100ml in about 10 minutes, but it used to take much longer - that's why the electric is better initially (imo)...

    I know that it's no consolation, but new bubs are just obsessive about sucking - I guess they're trying to establish your supply and make sure it's adequate for them. Doesn't help mum when she wants to get some rest though.

    I just wanted you to know that how you're feeling is so completely normal (not sure if you want to hear that or not - I know I felt like punching out anyone who said anything remotely like it at the time - but it is true). You will get through this. It is so hard to make decisions and have any sense of perspective when you're sleep deprived. Hopefully if you can get some expressing happening you can get some sleep and hand over to John for a couple of hours. Have you seen your CHN yet? If you have a good CHN ask her what she thinks about comp feeding... I've never done it, but I know some people who've given bub a comp feed or two, just to help mum recover and kept up the bf at the same time. I'm not quite sure how it's done though and I know the ABA frown on it - but like I said before, if it helps you keep going then it's got to ultimately be a good thing?? Dunno...

    Ring me anytime too!!!!! If you're worried about the STD expense, I will ring you back!!!

  14. #122

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    Mel and Beck, you poor girls, you are both sounding normal!! Dont' forget also, particularly beck as you're at the stage, that baby blues are common, and it is a VERY emotional time. Breastfeeding is really messy and painful, but it will settle down. I am EXACTLY where you are in regards to not remembering the night and wondering what happened. With that, I try to have coco on my tummy or by my side feeding and if I fall asleep she's usually on top of me. Another thing I do is put a little barrier around her, or a pillow in between. Try lying down to feed, then your're both flat and she won't fall anywhere.
    Also with swapping to formula, which may be really good for you, just remember you'll prob have to get up to make it at night, and youlll still have to feed her, so if you're tired it might not help that much. On the other hand, if you can't bear it, you do what is best for you. Maddy will be fine on formula, don't ever feel like a bad mum.
    finally for you both, motherhood is DAMN hard and noone warns you, or prepares you fully. You're both first time, and I think you're both doing brilliant jobs. What they don't tell you is how emotional and full on it is. THere is soooo much learning involved for the mother, and basically we have most of the responsibility so it's a huge life change.
    Help lines are wonderful, so put the number in speed dial (Tresillian in Syd is great, not sure who it is in QLD, but someone will know) and call them all the time.
    Hope you guys get a good sleep. Coco is not settling BUMMER better run, have DH in there trying to burp her (yes I have to feed AGAIN. Beck, Im doing the demand thing too) xoxoxoxo

  15. #123

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    Thank you all for the wonderful advice! Still feeling teary (you're right Meg - I think it's the baby blues hitting me at the moment) but now a little more under control. Think I would have jumped off a bridge by now if I didn't have such a loving and supportative husband.

    She's been sleeping on my chest for the past hour & a half; occasionally making little noises and stirring; but mostly asleep. For the most part, I gaze at her and just melt. It's just those insane moments (mostly at night when I'm wide awake with a restless, crying baby who is ripping at my nipples for four hours straight and DH has fallen asleep) when I feel almost resentful to her when I hear her begin to stir when she's fed for over an hour and only slept for 15mins.

    Jules, I do have the Avent one. The seal doesn't seem to be functioning too well but I'll take your advice and give it a rinse again and assemble it whilst wet.

    I'm tired and frustrated; so much of this comes from conflicting advice (especially from midwives etc) about what is acceptable for babies of this age. I mean, she's only a week old and I'm falling apart. It seems like every second resource tells you that dummies, expressing milk and feeding via bottles whilst still BFing etc are only suitable from 6wks onwards. What the heck do they expect you to do until then?

  16. #124

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    Hey Bec...ripping at your nipples for 4 hours straight is pretty full on. I'd be putting my foot down at that one! I think Meg's right too re: the baby blues. Be gentle on yourself at this time.

    I know what you mean re: conflicting advice. Most midwives and CHN's are trained to give you advice about the "ideal" situation. I have a really great CHN who recognises that not everyone fits nicely into the "ideal" and agrees that sometimes compromise is called for. I like her approach.

    Ultimately it's all about weighing up what will be the best for Maddy in the long term. If compromising on things like dummies, expressing, nipple sheilds etc helps you keep up the bf, then it's well worth it in my book. There is no black and white. That's the one thing that freaks me out most about being a mum is all the "shades of grey". Nothing is black and white, and it is such a huge responsibility to be making decisions on behalf of another helpless little human being - but remember that no matter what, you are her Mum and your intuition is the most powerful tool you have to keep her safe and happy in the world. I still feel like a complete novice (well..ok, so I am still a complete novice!) and I often turn to others for advice (BB, books, my beloved CHN, other mums) but I've always found my gut feelings to be the best way to go...

    Anyhow, we're not really talking about Maddy here are we. All in all, I think you are doing an absolutely fantastic job (just reading about your last few nights is making me feel exhausted!). You have a wonderful bond with Maddy by the sounds of it, and she sounds as if she is thriving. I'm not concerned in the least for her welfare - she's so lucky to have you for a mum. I am concerned about you however. You need to go easy on yourself. It's you who needs the TLC atm - Maddy has everything she needs and more.

    I had to laugh (in an ironic kind of way not a ha ha Bec's suffering kind of laugh) when you said "she's only one week old and I'm falling apart". Mark my words when I say that this is the absolute TOUGHEST time in early motherhood. Those first 2 weeks are so tough. BUT you will get through it.

  17. #125

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    Thank you Meg & Tiggy. Beck sorry to hear you're having problems too.

    Tiggy, Today I expressed milk and have been feeding him with a bottle. Also had to express because my sister took me to her friends house so we could go for a swim, so I left Logan with mum. I was trying to breastfeed this morning, but it just got too sore. I think I will try to get some nipple shields and see if that helps. I want him to get breast milk, and I will try breastfeeding for a while longer if my nipples stop hurting, I am even prepared to just express it all the time, but if none of that works I will go to formula.

    I am on the coast for good now. I am staying at Mums until DF and I can find somewhere to live, he's coming here on Thursday with all of our stuff. I'm in Narara.

    I haven't got in contact with anyone from CCH yet, I wasn't sure of who to call. I've only had contact with the acute care section of gosford hospital and then counsellours. I will make some calls on Tuesday since I need someone to talk to as well as see midwives. My case manager in Mudgee said he'd call CCH for me but he's on holidays until the 9th.

    Thank you again for offering to help and listen, I will have to take you up on it. Even though everyone is saying I am a great mum and I'm coping really well, I always doubt myself and any kind of help is most welcome

    *HUGS*

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