OOOh Bec, I was an absolute MESS when I went back to work after having indah & my sister was her nanny, I sobbed every day for atleast 2 months!
Which is why I decided I'd only do nights so they are all in bed when i laeve & so I am not missing anything (a bit of sleep but i can handle that!)
I know EXACTLY how you feel! Feel free to whinge & cry in here as I have BTDT... It's so so hard (well I found it immensely painful!)
My sister used to come & pick Indah up at 7:30am after i ahd fed her then she'd have 2 or 3 full bottles of EBm (180ml) & I'd express all day at work, then she'd wnat bobbie (mostly for comfort I think) as soon as my sis dropped her back to me at 5pm!
So Xavier didnt really have much did he!???
Indah & I both survived anyways as will yourself & Xavier!
We had just bought our home & so didnt have much choice either, plus we bought a new car & Dh bught another Harley, a brand new one & sold his older one!
It's all for the future hey!!!

Zyon's hair is growing quickly from his hair cut, he has so many belly rolls now & I weighed him at Mum's on her scales, by weighing him & I & then just myself & he's atleast 8+kgs now!
He is just so damned aesy & happy nowadays too, has his bath at 8pm, in bed by 8:45 & wakes around 7am... He also goes into the cot during the day for sleeps wide awake & settles himself, so I am so glad he has settled down nicely from the baby we started off with!
He just wants to stand up 24/7 so I get an upper body work out when I hold him! He goes mad in the JJ & also in the DK play thingy he got for Xmas!

Well I got my uniform ready to start next Monday night, I'm thinking it's gonna be so much cruisier than my last role!!!
Still not really looking forward to it though!

Hope your all groovy... I will try not to get lost again!