Babies Born in May 2006 #6

[shereejoy]

Yes Tania you are a chatter but I love it, can't wait to meet you.

So I have made a decision, after speaking to the doctor yesterday I was still well I dunnnoooooo...... But I have made the decision after having a long talk to my CHN and she wanted me to make the decision based on what I want to do not what I am told to do, but agrees with my doctor and if I am going to do it, do it cold turkey as I was considering still feeding during the night when he is semi-subconscious and attaches well, but then I tried him at 7am feed to see if he attaches during the day, and nope he is one clever little bub grrr.... I guess this put me over the line with my deicision, after seeing the lactation consultant the other week she suggested to express for 2 weeks and try him again on my boob and this morning prooved to me that things had not changed and who was I kidding - they will not get better, my baby knows how to work me. My CHN was a little dissapointed at the doc for just telling it straight to me as to this is what I am going to do, but agreed she is right but I have to be ok with it in my mind and it has to be my decision. She asked if I was ok with going the way the doctor had suggested and my response was that I guess in a sense seeing as my boobs were the only thing that were going right with my body (no cracked nipples, no bleeding, no mastitis), I just wanted to hold onto that! but in saying that I have tried everything and persevered for 3 weeks now expressing and it is just toooo hard and very demanding around his regular feeding patterns. She said she thought I had come to the end of the line, especially seeing as Lachie is still only continuing to put on 100grams per week and she would have expected him to flourish by now (he weighed at 4.54kgs - 10 lb today 12 weeks 1 day). Over the past month he has gone from 25 percentile to 10, and now to below 3, so in her mind that was telling me something. So that also got me over the line with it. He has never lost weight and never not gained weight but he could be doing so much better she believed. Soooo yes as you probably have guessed I am going cold turkey and we are going to FORMULA. I spoke to her in detail about the prescription formula he is on and she ensured me that he will be getting everything he needs. I still feel sad that it has come to this, but I am also feeling somewhat relieved that I have made a decision for the sanity of me and my baby boy. You would not believe how much better I feel and that has to rub off on him. So there you go, that is the news. I am going to freeze all this expressed milk and start him tonight so we are ready for our trip so I know he will be ok while we are away, and then give him some expressed milk when we return to get rid of it all. Now I can enjoy our holiday, I can eat dairy and I don't have to 2 hourly express anymore phewww.... so much tension has released from my shoulders it is amazing. Finally I feel good and I just can't explain how happy I feel about my decision.

Thank you for your support Vic, Jodie and Tanya. Have I ever told you girls I lub you, you are all sooo fantastic and sooo supportive to me I can't thank you enough.



Oh and Tanya that is exactly what my doctor told me, that it was possibly only CIN1, she didn't get the results from my gyno and that if it goes to CIN2 I will need a colonoscopy etc, etc, etc..... basically everything you said, so lets hope that I am in the 97% that it will just go back to normal at my next 6mth papsmear, as I need a break I recovered soooo badly with my caesar I need a break!