don't be sorry Tara - we all feel like that at times hun - question the reasons behind everything. I'm about - just keeping to myself at the moment. I having a colonoscopy on friday, and my anxiety is raging at the moment.... the unknown is never good with me. I completely stuffed dinner tonight, just because I couldnt figure out what to have. I have to have specific things for the three days upto thursday, and then only clear liquid on thursday along with a yukky drink. Because we had a radical food change when I was diagnosed with pre diabetes, all the stuff that I am supposed to eat is no longer in the house - and all the things that I am not supposed to eat are - complete change around, and I am not coping with it. silly i know in the big scheme of things - how hard can it be to eat a high carb diet for three days.... apparently harder then I thought!