hi rainy - the same thing was happening with Hannah as well. I find if she falls asleep while i'm feeding her, she wakes up not long after and is difficult to get back to sleep. I try hard to get her to have an afternoon sleep (about 3:30) so she won't fall asleep on the boob. I know that when she is waking she is looking for me - because i was with her when she fell asleep , if she wakes and i'm not there she gets upset. I know that is why she doesn't sleep well, but i'm choosing to rock her to sleep still. It just works for me at this time.
Anyway, I guess perhaps what i'm saying is the reason that L is probably waking is because you were there with him when he fell asleep and so gets upset when he stirs and you're not there. (have been doing a bit of reading lol) I'm not sure how to fix it, other than teaching him to self settle - and i'm definitely not a good example of that lol.

i don't think i answered your question re the dummy - i use the Happy baby brand. Apparently a lot of midwives recommend them. I know it gives them something else to be dependent on, but if it works... Hannah wouldn't take it at first, but i kept popping it in, and eventually she took it - especially when she was really sleepy.

If it gets too hard for you to cope with, would you consider having a 'baby whisperer' visit you at home. I know a couple of people who have used one and their sleep woes have been fixed. They cost a bit, but may be worth it if it means you get more sleep.

sorry for the babble, and i've probably been of no help. I do know how you feel though