Haha, Amumma, that is weird, mines a childhood nickname from my name Sarah. Thanks for adding me
Lolpigs- woohoo for you!!! 8-7am sleeps sounds awesome. I shouldnt complain Emilia does 11- 6/7 am. I don't think u should let ur mum make u feel guilty about TTC soon... It's your choice and I think it's really nice for siblings to be so close, in fact I take my hat off to mums having bubbas close in age, I struggle with one! I say good on u
CK ur calming strategies sound lovely, especially the skin to skin in the shower, I've never thought of that, might try it next time Emilia is beside herself.
Amanda- it's amazing! It sounds like ur explaining exactly how I'm feeling. No didn't have any anesthetic before they cut, although I did have the epidural going, so I couldnt feel much. I had trouble with my stitches healing. I think they did them too tight inside, so yeh healed on the surface but so sore when there's pressure on the site. It was so painful having to have the 6 week checkup when she did the smear test, felt like I was ripping all over again. DP and I have tried to DTD but unsuccessfully it just hurt too much, so thought I'd give it more time to heal on the inside. Although if it's all just scar tissue its always going to feel tight and uncomfortable. I'm thinking of getting a proper gyno check if there's no difference over the next couple of weeks. Well done to you for going drug free, especially having a 9lb baby! it amazes me when woman do that now that I know how utterly excruitiating and horrid the pain is.
Emilia very rarely has a full blown tantrum but when she does I hold her tight and walk up and down the house rocking her and telling her it's ok in a relaxed voice, it takes a while but eventually she calms down and falls asleep in my arms. If I was desperate though and that didn't work I'd put her in a warm bath coz she is always relaxed in the water.
DP and I went to a friends wedding last night baby free! Oh my gosh I forgot how good it was to just be a couple again, and not have to worry about what Emilia was wanting/needing. I think we really should make more of an effort to have couple time more regularly, I realized how much I miss just being us. Mind you, I missed her terribly, and always wondered how she was doing lol! I think it's amazing how much youre relationship changes once you have a baby, didn't expect it to be so drastic!
I feel like I'm taking something away from Lilly now, when before I thought it would be lovley for her to have a sibling so close. Its all I ever wanted as a child more siblings as I was an only child. My mum is making me feel like she should have all the attention because its not fair on Lilly to take it away from her or something? I dont know shes made me very uncertain about it all now.
DH tells me not to worry about it, we will just do what suits us, but it puts that doubt in your mind you know? blegh!
That sounds painful! I have been sympathising with Amanda about her scars, I had to have a C/S which had a 6 week recovery and it was horrid but I don't know what is worse! What you both seem to be going through or the C/S.
Emilia is doing well going from 11 - 6/7am. Lilly used to do 6pm - 2am then 2-6am but now she has bumped it back a but and is sleeping through. She slept through again last night except for somehow getting turned sideways and I woke to her kicking the side of her cot really loudly :/ But she went straight back to sleep thankfully.
I tried a shower once with Lilly but she hated it. Would be easier than bathing I rekon! She likes to kick in the water too much. I'm enrolling her in swimming lessons once she is 6months old, so we can go out and spend some time in the pool
*Yawwwwn* Wow I'm tired. Went out for my birthday and a friend's 30th last night, didn't get to bed until 11pm and of course Alex's day still starts between 5.30am and 6am. Might sneak back to bed when he has his nap. He was a trooper though, went to sleep in the pram and barely stirred, even with music going and people talking and everything.
With the downstairs scarring, I'd definitely see a gyno. I tore and had stitches, but other than being a bit dry which is easily fixed with a bit of KY, haven't had any problems DTD. Other than being normally too tired and just wanting to fall into bed and sleep that is!
Lolpigs, don't let those doubts stop you from having the family you want. Kids are adaptable, Lilly will grow up having the attention of both you as her parents and her siblings as well - it just becomes the new normal. Personally I think having them close is better because you avoid all those jealousy issues that arise when you have a big enough gap for them to understand what they don't have anymore. But even then, ultimately they adjust.
Thanks for the support guys. GRR my husband has turned into this mega jerk since going back to work. Everytime I ask for help I get it thrown back in my face later, with "why isnt' it already done" Yet he can't decide what his expectations are. I've aready told him it isnt fair on me for him to come home and take shots at me when I ask for help, yet he has said if he was home he would catch up on sleep... how would anything get done then? This double standards **** ****es me off...
RAWR, I dont know what to do, he dosent seem to want to talk about it either just gets all ****y saying "I'm wrong ok?" wtf seriously. It is like he expects never to have to do anything, and If I ask while Lilly is asleep he gets all ****ty.
Kind of at a loss as to what to do. I have no clue where I stand right now and its upsetting to get attacked all the time. I am trying to get him to tell me what his expectations are.. but this is getting stupid. I feel like I can't ask him for help with anything, and last night he got the ****s for me asking him to bath Lilly?
I know talking to him and sorting it out is probably the only answer, but he dosent seem to want to do that and its upsetting me.
WWYD?
Last edited by Lolpigs; February 26th, 2012 at 09:21 AM.
CK, thanks hun the taking them into a darker room / shower idea is good, ill give that a go next time - i really want to know that i can calm her without feeding her! it makes me anxious otherwise... it sure is heartbreaking when they get so upset..
AM, i think Violet is starting to teethe too - shes dribbling lots, and has had another two super tantrums, and also hardly slept at all last night, woke every hour at least.. SO tired today! She is also quite snuffly in the nose..
How do you truly know if theyre teething? Other than dribbling, being fussier than usual and sucking their hands?
Seppy, thank you heaps for saying telling me about your stitches too, i was starting to worry that there was something wrong with the way mine were healing! And thanks for saying about DTD hurting too (sorry to hear that it hurt you though, poor thing) - i will definitely hold off for a bit longer.. What you described sounds exactly the same as mine, really sore when there is a bit of pressure... OH you poor thing having the 6 week check done - for some reason my GP didnt bother checking my stitches out which i was truthfully grateful for! I went to the GP at about 10 days postpartum though cos i was worried that they werent healing properly and possibly getting infected - she said they were healing fine, just lots and lots of stitches so would take a while to heal.. and i am overdue now for my pap smear but not going to have it done till i feel less sore..! I cant imagine getting one done, how incredibly painful! Hah, yeah, 9 pounds was a big baby for me, im a pretty small build (size 8) and DH is very tall and quite well built so i think Violet must have gotten her size from him, plus being overdue... (stomach is flat again but you should see the stretch marks!!!! Plus my tummy muscles split so im getting physio for that!) Im glad to know im not the only one having stitches issues, so thanks for sharing!!! I was getting anxious! Like you though, i may get a gyno check myself in a few weeks - just kinda scared of what they might say! Oh the other thing that freaks me out is the thought of having another baby now, being stitched up too tightly makes me scared of how badly the tearing will be for the next baby... gah!! BUT its all worth it
Lolpigs, awwwwwwwwww you poor thing with the man DH. Truthfully not sure what to suggest cos ive got a similar situation myself! I had almost no sleep the other night, and DH has been on holidays for the week, and when Violet woke up around 7am for the morning i asked him if he would get up and he replied, ohh i just want some more sleep, i was like UM youve had 8 hours, ive had about 3, and YOU want some more sleep? The only way ive found inthe past that i can bring up these kinds of criticisms is hiding the criticism with a compliment, like, "oh im so grateful how hard your working for our family and really appreciate it, at the moment im feeling i need a bit of help with Lilly etc etc" - definitely not fun when they get all nasty about things... its difficult cos while i LOVE looking after Violet, it is quite demanding, and its not like we can really get a break - the DHs get to come home from work and have a break, yet our job continues around the clock! OH and you shouldnt feel guilty about TTC - LIlly will have a sibling really close in age, and thats wonderful!!!!!!!!!!! Im a twin, and having a sibling so close in age (or exactly the same in my case) is awesome!!!
On a side note, has anyone read / heard good things about either of these two books?: Sheyne Rowleys Dream Baby Guide; Positive Routing Management for Happy Days and Peaceful Nights or Baby Love by Robyn Barker? Both look quite good but not sure which to get! Also planning to buy Annabel Karmels Weaning book
And, with snuffly noses, is there anything you can do?! Violets seems quite blocked today but it seems like theres nothing much you can do to help?! I get scared she will not be able to breathe if it gets more blocked!?
that stuff is awesome Amanda! for lil blocked noses...Zoe always seems to have a snuffly nose, I squirt a couple of squirts up her lil nostrils, and then get the de-boogar-er out and suck those snots right out!
So, we set the Jolly Jumper up today...and Zoe LOVES it! so darn cute watching her jump around hehe
Thanks for the support about the new baby guys, I appreciate it. I was quite shaken when mum was talking about it like having a new one would be a bad thing. We want 3 children and I dont want to be almost 40 having the last one either LOL so I guess the will all be close in age
Good news on the DH front, after a day of me just not talking to him much he came over at dinner and apologised. Told him he had to make it up to me, and apparently I have flowers on their way today as well. I guess it is a hard adjustment for everyone. Fingers crossed we can move on from here.
Jolly jumper is win Nikky, we have one set up too, Lilly loves tapping the mat with her feet and making the sounds happen on the mat haha
Could be, Alex is 16 weeks on Thursday but seems to hit most of his about a week or so early. Something to do with having been overdue I guess? I think it's true what they say, you can't miss what you haven't had, I'm finding going from having had decent sleep to having crap sleep again harder than just having crap sleep. Ah well, this too will pass.
Got to the point yesterday that I had to put him in his cot and leave the room for a few minutes. It's not like he cries much, he yells. Sort of this indignant growly yell that says I am not understanding what he's wanting and not fixing it for him. And he's getting so frustrated.
Yeah I find that too with Lilly. I agree I think it is something to do with being overdue. Oh I agree! Lilly just had 4 nights in a row of sleeping 9 hours, this is killing me although not as much as you I suspect!
Haha Lilly does that too, yells at me rather than cries now. I'm getting really frustrated with Lilly's constant moving interrupting her sleep, driving me up the wall. I've had to leave her and walk away too. She yells as me while shes doing it. Drives me up the wall. I'm like I know chicken but I can't stop you moving only you can! Tried even just holder her in place to calm her till she slept but that didn't work either.
Her feeds and sleeps are stuffed today because she was up half the night.
Levi has stared tellig at me, it's so hard not to laugh at the poor boy. Doesn't help him settle much lol. Levi sleeps better in the cool weather, he's been having day sleeps rather than naps.
Sometimes I have to look at Abby's face to see if she's worked up or talking, little monkey's try to have it over us.
CK bugger having to be up every 2 hours.
it just hurt too much, so thought I'd give it more time to heal on the inside. Although if it's all just scar tissue its always going to feel tight and uncomfortable. I'm thinking of getting a proper gyno check if there's no difference over the next couple of weeks. Well done to you for going drug free, especially having a 9lb baby! it amazes me when woman do that now that I know how utterly excruitiating and horrid the pain is. 
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