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:hug: Fi for you and little Leila. Sounds just like Eli atm. He is putting everything in his mouth that might fit (bib, blankets, hands, fingers until he gags etc)... and the dribbling is insane! I have started giving him cold teething rings which seem to keep him happy but they are quite big so we have to hold them for him while he gums away on them.
Good luck on a good nights sleep - i have just put Eli down and am hoping for the same since he has been waking the last few nights.
x Tam.
just dropping in to say ive been keeping up but havent had a chance to really even breathe these last few days..
i will be back when i can for personals
til then HUGE :hug: to all our mummies and babies xxx
thought i may as well post while i can (about to go and pick DD up from MIL)
Rach75: good to hear you stuck to your routine. Its hard sometimes, i try to stick to the little rountine i have as much as i can but DH throws it all away when he comes home anyway :(
WOOHOO how exciting about Luke rolling onto his back :dance: i was VERY slack with tummy time when Miss A was very little, coz she HATED it, but as of about 2 weeks ago she really enjoys it so i put her on her belly much more :) she's rolled onto her back a few times but i honestly think it was just fluke, she was just leaning to one side and lost balance and kind of toppled over, was vvery funny to see
Tam: sorry i cant help with the blocked ducts :( and im so sorry to hear Eli has been out of sorts
Fi: no i havent done a hpt yet, i will be doing one in the next few days, im almost too nerveous to do it lol. Im so to hear you had such a rough night with Leila :( its so hard when you dont know what the matter is :(
afm: im not in a veruy good mood :( DH has been at me all day and im so over it. i just cant wait tfor him to go back to ****ing work.
Miss A cut her first tooth a couple of days ago, it makes sense now why she was so grumpy, but she hasnt gootten any better, if anything worse. but now that i know i can give her teething rings and teething gel (the curash one) well the other day i was at my friends MG (they went to the pool and she invited me to go) was lots of fun hangiong out with lots of lil babies (all a few months older than Miss A) but when we went back to one of the ladies places, we had all the bubs on the floor and Miss A started laughing, like REALLY laughing, ive just gone "this is Alissa'a first laugh" and it souded SOO cute.. i started crying infront of everyone LOL how embaressing, then they're all going "naw.. how sweet" and she's just laughing her head off, it was the coolest thing ever.
i best be off, sorry if i missed anything or anyone, im just haveing such an off day :(
xxx
just to clarify our routine is one Luke has got himself into not one we chose if that makes sense, it was just a matter of I read his moods etc, with Jack IL's would not take any notice if I said Jack is tired they would keep bouncing him round passing him back and forth basically ignoringme then when he was way overtire stimulated pass him back and off they would go to bed :wall: frustrated the crap out of me, so this time I am being tough I am the one who has to deal with the boys at night no-one helps me so its my rules if they want to think I am a witch I sdont care anymore :lol:
Hi all! I've been lurking on the forums from time to time but its been awhile since I posted in here - sorry!
I have started training to be a natural fertility educator which is right up my alley with natural medicine so I am really excited. Its only a few hours a week at this stage but will hopefully bring me some rewarding work (part-time of course) down the track.
Jasper is as well as can be - can't believe how big he is getting! :o He is such a happy little chap - always smiling, cooing and blowing bubbles. The other day he surprised me as I put him down on his tum, and when I checked on him again he had rolled onto his back with his head up the other end! I might have brain fog but I don't remember DS1 doing this manouver at this age! :doh:
The best news however, is that he has started sleeping through. :dance: His pattern varies a little - between 5 - 7.5 hr sleeping stints at night, but I'm not going to complain about that! Only prob is the sore boobies!
Last time my periods came back when DS1 started sleeping through so I'll have to be careful if that happens. Not ready for a 3rd just yet!!
Our only issue is that Jasper is not so keen on other people - just wants to be held by Mum and Dad at this stage, which upsets my MIL a little - but she'll just have to get over that until he grows out of the clingy phase. People tend not to believe us when we tell them that we rarely hear Jasper cry - coz he always cries with other people!! :wall:
Well, I hope you & your bubbas are all well. I will have to pop back in over the weekend to catchup on the goss.
XX
Welcome back JB!
Glad to hear Jasper is doing well and congrats on getting a few hours sleep each night.
IKWYM about the moving around. Eli has a little lovenest pillow (he was starting to get a bit of flat spot so i bought one to help prevent it... seems to be doing the trick) but when i go and get him from his cot in the mornings the pillow is normally out from his head and he has turned himself at least 90 degrees in the bed - all this and he has been sleeping wrapped!
Speaking of wrapping - i have finally had the last 2 nights where i have been able to leave his arms out from being wrapped so i am heading off to buy some sleeping bags for him today. : )
Stay well
x Tam.
Hi All
Wow Stevie, Miss A has cut a tooth already! That's so cute about the laughing! Your little girl sounds so adorable.
Rach75 I know what you mean about the routine. I am the same with Leila. We have a routine but it's not something I have forced upon her or something that I stick to like clockwork or anything, it really is just about reading her signs and knowing when she is tired. Unfortunately other people don't get this and love over stimulating her so I've had to learn to be firmer with them otherwise she ends up extremely over-tired and grumpy and of course I am the one that has to deal with her when she is like that.
JB welcome back! So glad little Jasper is doing so well and sleeping through the night :dance: Great news about the natural fertility stuff, I'm all for that. After coming off the pill and TTC for about a year nothing happened! I only had about 3 or 4 periods which were totally random so I went to the doctor had tests done and found out I had PCOS. GP told me I'd never conceive naturally and referred me to a fertility specialist who put me on clomid. It worked but I hated it, felt so unnatural and didn't seem to agree with me. I ended up m/c that baby. After that I really didn't want to do it again so I went to see a naturopath who was amazing. We started off just cleansing my system and getting my body back in balance before targeting my reproductive system. After only a few months of working on my reproductive system my cycle was regular for the first time in my life, I couldn't believe it! Then when I was ready to TTC again BANG, first time lucky :dance: So I am all for natural treatments. Best of luck with it.
Tammie, how is the unwrapping going? I tried the other day to not wrap Leila but it was a disaster! I think it's because of the routine that we are in, she now knows that being wrapped means time for sleep so when I didn't wrap her and put her to bed she didn't get that it was sleep time and just wanted to play! I'm not sure how to overcome this?
AFM I am officially back at work on Monday :cry: I'm not looking forward to it. Otherwise all is good. Leila is just adorable at the moment!! She's always smiling and laughing and talking. She LOVES talking at the moment, just babbles away to anyone who will listen, it's so cute. The only problem we are having is that she's not feeding very well. Everything else seems to be so much more exciting than feeding and I'm starting to worry that she's not drinking enough. Sometimes she just pulls off mid feed and starts laughing her head off at nothing in particular! Its very cute but very frustrating because I just want her to feed. Once she does that she wont go back on, she just wants to look around at anything and everything. I really hope this phase passes soon...
Hi to everyone else,
Fi x
Fi - good luck with work tomorrow. I'm sure it will be really hard to leave Leila so huge hugs to you.
Just thought i would let you know, with the wrapping (or unwrapping rather) I started slowly and for the first week i wrapped Eli but left one arm out, then the next week i left both arms out but still wrapped the rest of him... then last night i put him in a sleeping bag.
It will prob take E a few more nights to get used to having free legs but then he will be fine (i hope).
Apparently it takes a baby 4 days to learn a new habit and 7 days to break it. This has pretty much held true for Eli as after 3-4 nights i have noticed he adapts to having a new part of him unwrapped each time.
Good luck!
I can't beleive you girls are still wrapping :lol: I think I wrapped Luke maybe 1/2 dozen times since we got out of hospital on day 5 :lol:
well things are going ok here, TMI but AF was back this week and it kicked my butt big time, headaches etc, I had to stop the fluid tablets as that combined with AF was making me so dizzy so of course I am suffering from sore wrists, hands, legs and ankles can't catch a break I tells ya
well good ole Luke is starting to have a hissy, I know I shouldn't complain I love he sleeps 11hrs overnight but I hate getting up at 6am... and he is now having his big nap about 7.30am so I am not getting a rest as Jack wakes around 8am *yawn* also I need to vent I am tired of being the on,ky one who feeds him comfort hims, I made the decision only Jasenad I would feed him no dramas, but Jase never feeds him unless I am real busy and then he gets frustrated with Luke :( I have no family close by... so even if I wanted some one else to feed him I have no-one :(... I am tired, my back is out, I have a headache all I want to do is sleep and although I am sleeping ok over night I'm still tired physically... and mentally as I said I shoudln't complain he is a fairly easy going baby... but I just feel worn out :cry:
Rach, my Af arrived a few weeks ago, and was glad it came and gone, but sad too, cause it really makes it sink in that bub is now here (and not just the sleepless nights!)
Rach (rach2281) and fi - I just noticed you two have been RAKed!! Lucky you!
We've been up and down here for the past week or so, so I've barely been on - We're off to Centerlink to hopefully sort out our baby bonus stuff :shakehead:
oh LJ this is #3 visit from AF
congrats to all you girks who have been RAK'd
hello ladies, how are we all? im good i guess. did a hpt a while ago and it was neg, made me alittle sad but at the same time relieved iykwim. i still havent gotten AF yet, i think she might be here soon, ive been having all the symptoms for the last week, so we'll see.
fi and tam: i was wrapping Miss A for about 3 -4 weeks just been, it kind of camt out of the blue, all of sudden she wouldnt slep unless wrapped, but about 3 nights ago, i wrapped her like usual and she woke up SCREAMING, i loosened the wrap and she flung her arms up above her head and she went right back to sleep, so have stopped wrapping her now and she's fine :shrug: no idea what goes through their tiny heads.
fi: yeah i couldnt believe she had her first tooth, and now theone next to it is coming through, it hasnt broken the skin but you can see it there.
i will be thinking of you at work today sweetness :( im so sad for you. i know its going to suck going back the more i think about it the more i dont want to :( ive been feeling really lost about what i want to do in my life. i know now is probably a bad time to dwell on that as ive just had a baby and most peoples theory is "its a bit late now" but i dont know. i finally orked out what i want to do, but we just cant afford for me to not work as well as we cant afford to pay for the courses. I want to be a Nail Technicion, and eventually study Beauty Therapy - but nails is what i love doing. when i was 16 my Mum was going topay for me to do the course but we had a falling out and it never happened. im just gonna have to put it on the very very back burner i think
JB: so good to see you back :) Well done on your training, it sounds like its something your really into, and that afterall, is the main thing and its awesome to hear jasper is doing so well xx
Rach75: so sorryt o hear youve had such a rough time with AF and it is good when they sleep all night, but it would be even better if they had a good sleep during the day and not right after they get up. Like MIss A is asleep right now, and she's only been up for a little while, once she wakes up she probably wont sleep for the rest of the day lol.
LJ: Centrelink sucks. they are always such a stuff around i hope you sort all your stuff out soon xx hows lil William doing?
Congrats to all that got RAKed :clap:
afm: well it turns out that we cant get the car. we couldnt get the finances, we coul have gotten a personal loan but we arent silly. the repayments and interest is just far too much. so naturally DH isnt happy. Im bummed too, but thats life, ive gotten over it and im moving on.
Miss A is teething and hasnt been herself, overall she's been really good, but sahe has a 'tanty time' at some point during the day, where she gets realy upset, overally upset, little tears and all :( it breaks my heart, i do cold teething rings, try feeding her to calm her down, then i put teething gel on if nothing else works and as an absolute last resort i give her panadol :(
we have her 4 months needles tomorrow, im a little worried ive heard soo many bad things, that they get really REALLY stropy after this lot and stop sleeping through :( im scared LOL. im getting my WC and swine flu needles too.
Hello to everyone else :)
take it easy xxx
dont stess over the needles we never had any problems with jack's in fact I dont and wont give panadol unless there is real upset etc....just dont plan anything for the day, give her lots of cuddles etc...and remember she is teething as well
To Rach75 and LJ - AF sucks. I got mine back 3 weeks after i stopped bleeding from the birth! Not happy (especially since bub was 100% bf) but i think mine was early because i started the mini pill - i'm definitely not ready for another bubby!
Stevie - i think i commented on FB but it is just insane that A has 1 tooth and another on the way... *sigh* they grow up so fast. LOL. I think E's gums are sore too. For the past week or so he has been gumming his toys and dummies and also starts feeding but then pulls away and screams. I was concerned when he started doing that but apparently when theie gums are starting to get sore they can go on feeding strikes because sucking hurts. Always something..... in the meantime if he gets too cranky i give him a cold teething ring and this calms him... but i hope the teeth come soon because ppl say this can go on for months before some babies get any teeth!
Fi - how was your first day back at work? I hope everything went smoothly for you. : )
Hi to all the ladies i have missed, gtg since Eli is sitting in another room chatting away..i love chatting with him! :D
x Tam.
i just have a quick question, (im also gonna start a thread)
but i think Miss A has Conjunctivitis :( her right eye had a bit more sleep than usual in it this moring (she never really has any at all) but as the days gone on i have to keep cleanin it away from her right eye, its also looking a little watery and red and she keep rubbing at it. then just then when i got her out of the car there was all this gunk around her eye lashes and in the corner of her eye :cry:
i have a Drs app tomorrow for her needles, can i wait til then or should i take her to the drs now? and also is there something that i can do now?
thanks ladies :)
warm salty water and clean it from inside to outer area :) hth!!! but do get dr to check tomorrow
thanks sweet, and i def will get him to check it tomorrow.
so luke is officially on the knidy list for :lol: 2014
good luck today Stevie and Alissa :) be brave both of you :hug:
Good luck with needles today Stevie and Miss A! Also, with the eye, that does sound like an infection. Eli has a blocked tear duct (which means it weeps anytime he gets a bit teary) and when i spoke to the pharmacist she said to take him to the dr if the eye got red or he started rubbing it etc as these were signs of infection. If it helps, i have found the best thing to clean it with is Fess Little Eyes wipes - they are sterilised individually wrapped saline wipes and since using these for the past 2 weeks i have noticed a huge improvement over just using warm water etc.
Rach - I hear you on the education front! I am currently comparing a couple of schools for bub so i can enrol him ASAP. I think i will skip a formal kindy program and stick with a day care/early learning centre and then go into prep at whichever school we end up picking. It is all so confusing trying to work out where to send bub and what's going to be best going forward as well as convenient for us to get to every day for drop offs and pick ups....... and he's only 3 months old!
No new news for me really.... i have a question though.... Eli slept through night from the very beginning but over past 3 weeks approx he has been waking up once during the night (around 2am) almost every night. He's had a few other signs which indicate his gums getting sore, is this another side effect or have i broken my sleeping baby!?!
At first i put it down to a growth spurt but this has gone on for too long now for it to be growth spurt. Not sure what's happened.
BTW - i hope you survived your first day Fi and are doing ok on day 2.
x Tam.
Thanks Rach :)
Tam: thanks heaps hun;, im sure well be ok. i just hate seeing her eye all gunky and she's just so little and sweet to be like that.
with Eli waking, Miss A actually did the EXACT thing for about 2 weeks before i noticed a tooth, and now she's back to sleeping through. i really think teething has something to do with waking up (she woke up at 2am too, i know its propbably a coinnkidink lol)
anyway gotta go feed the lizards, then get ready for my parenting class.
Have a good one guys xx
Tammie I beleive it can ... affect sleep which is why the hylands tablets have help with restless sleep during teething :hmm: Luke woke last night well this morning at 3.25am *yawn* I am buggered... been so long since I had a 3am wake up :lol: I truly think he is getting readu to teeth... we are lucky in respect of school only one choice out here but kindy is very competitive only 44 students a year... and this last few years the influx of kids is phenominal...so best book him in I said he is #5 on list...
as I said Luke woke at 3.25am *yawn* had been woken by jack at 3am as his sheet had come loose, so was half awake so fed him and changed him he was all smiles and coos, he wnet back down at 4.15am and then was up at 6.25am *yawn* I am stuffed and its only 8am he has goen back down again but no point me going as jack will wake soon, I feel off like I am comign down with something I just dont know .. its been lingering for a week now *sigh*
Hi girls,
Just a quick question.... a few people have mentioned to me how great the Baby Einstein box set of DVD's are for bubs now and as they are growing.... have any of you used/heard things about them?
I am really torn about whether to buy them because on one hand i don't want him watching TV too much but on the other they are an educational DVD.....
Tammie I believe the baby eistien DVDs are no better than wtahcing normal TV...I read a study abut it saying they dont make your kid smarter? I thinkn its on the blog peacefull parenting :) But they will be ok if you are justing wanting to keep him amused :)
will bbl am trying to type while feeding and its super hard lol xxxx
Tam: im not sure about the DVDs ive never heard about them. i am an aweful Mum, i let Miss A watch TV all the time. if im not playing with her, or feeding her or if she's not sleeping i put her on the floor, she LOVES being on the floor, and give her some toys that she's only now just gettinginterested in, a wrap (she for some reason loves snuggling it and kicking it) then i sith the telly on and sometimes she watchess it for ages, sometimes she doesnt. but at the moment once ive dont all the usual play things, theres nothing left for me to do with her except that.
i honeslty cant see what harm tv does if in moderation, and its not like i plonk her down there all day.
afm: we had our needles yesterday, i was a good mummy this time and i held Miss A while she got them, she screamed at first but calmed down allot quicker than last time. and this time she didnt get her all calm and then do the other leg, she did it rather quickly. i got my swine flu shot, coz i already got whooping cough i didnt need the shot, but MIL got hers since she's around Bub alot so she got it for free as well. just gotta get DH in there to get his.
Miss A slept really well last night, i expected a problem but she was good. she was a bit stropy after the needles, we had a shower and it calmed her down a little. but i gave her some panadol before i gave her her last feed last night (about half an hour before i put her to bed) only coz she did have a rough afternoon, and figured this might help her sleep better.
I was ment to be catching up with a lovely lady from BB today but since Miss A has conjunktivitus i told her we'll wait til it clears up and do it another time. so now my day is free to clean clean clean LOL.
oh i also got Miss A weighed yesterday and she said she was roughly (i cant remeber the exact number.. i do have it written down) 5200g, i told her that the week before she was 5400g (with a clean dry nappy on) should be worried? she sad some scales can be out and not to worry but its in the back of my head :(
xxx
Hi All
Just a quick one from me as I have a terrible cold at the moment. Work was ok, not too bad at all and Leila actually had a really good day in child care so was very happy when DH picked her up (he finishes work earlier than me). Thanks for all of your kind thoughts.
Leila had her needles yesterday too. She was really good at the time but got very upset in the evening and i had to give her panadol. She ended up sleeping for 10.5 hours! Was great for me as I'm feeling so awful.
Well Leila has definitely found her voice! For the last few days she's talked constantly! She used to vocalise a bit but now it's all the time, it's like she's having a conversation with you its so cute. When she's not 'talking' she's blowing bubbles and raspberries. I can't beleive how absolutely adorable she is and I can't believe how much she's changed and growing up at the moment, she seems to have developed so much in the past week it's amazing.
I'm not back in the office again until Friday but am supposed to be working from home (the equivalent of 1 day done whenever I get the chance) but as I'm not feeling well I think I'll wait until tomorrow before I start to get into too much.
Will be back later to catch up on personals.
Fi
Oh yay I got RAK'd!!! That's so sweet, I wonder who it was... is there any way I can find out?
Unfortunately not - unless the person actually tells you:
That's awesome! :D
so I went to CHN today Luke is doing wonderful...he isn't as heavy as I thought though but he is 7600grm which is 90% line length 66.5cm 95% and HC 42.5 75% :) so all great
so I need to say something and please it is not a dig at anyone... I am starting to feel uncomfortable about talkign about how well LUke is going ... if I say he sleeps thru I feel like I shouldn't say anything as I might upset or offend someone whose bub isn't...again this is not a dig at anyone but there have been a a few threads lately about people being upset becuase their baby doesn't do this etc, and all the replies basically say those mums whose bubs are sleeping thru are liers its really gettingmy goat... today is the first day I let Luke CIO only becuase I know he needs a sleep he went down ok but woke after 30min he needs a sleep we had a busy morning.. but when I read replies its liek if your child sleeps thru you are either lying or letting you baby cry all the time :( I freely admit Luke is a very easy going child that being said I do have days where I want to tear my hair out, the last 2 days we have had 3am wakes up... I know big deal but becuase he has slept thru for the last 4-5 weeks its a huge shock to my system... and even though I am married have a hubby at home etc not working away doens't mean I get any help with the boys... in fact Jase does very little when it comes to Luke maybe one or 2 nappy changes a week, gives him a bath maybe 1/2 dozen times since he was born, and as for feeding well I basically have to force him to give him a bottle, bear in mind I am also running aroudn after a active 3 year old, who doesn't have naps is on the go all day...I do all the housework, everything... the only thing I dont do is feed the animals and outside chores... everything else falls on my shoulders so the fact my child sleeps thru doesn't mean I am well rested if he didn't sleep I think I would have fallen over by now
anyway I needed to rant I didn't know where I well I know you girls well Ihoep you wont judge me by my rant LOL
thanks for listening
:hug: Aww Rach hun! Your doing a great job and please feel free to tell us how the boys are going. I lie and say he sleeps through just cause I dont want well meaning aunts etc to tell me to let him cry lol so maybe thats what they mean?! You have to do what is right for your babies...if you feel comfortable letting him have a cry then thats fine. Yopur doing a great job and we all do things differently :hug:
Woohoo on everyone who has been RAKed its awesome :)
Sorry I havent been around much its so hard to keep up and i have been trying not to spend so much time on the pc!
DS2 is going well havent had him weighed for a while...better do it monday lol! Ds1 is getting a bit jealous of Ds2 at the moment!Argh its really hard.
anyway DS1 is calling better go xxx
thanks but just to clarify when I said I let him CIO today he cried for less than 2min :lol: but its the comments people make about if your child sleeps thru you either lying or letting the CIO that are getting me down I dont do either .... excpet for 2 x less than 2min spurts today *sigh*
:hug: Rach Ds2 has a cry here and there its no big deal...we just dont let him scream for ages iykwim :) Its touigh wiht 2 hey...If M is inot something and I have to put F down and he cries I just have to deal wiht it till I can sort whatever mess M has done lol! xx
god when say cry he isn't tscreaming most people would say hes not crying :lol: anywa i am over my rant just needed to get it out cause it was weighing me down and i was havil ill thoughts towards others and sometimes if can ust write it out its all good :lol:
naw Rach, sweetheart, who cares what everyone else says?
when i say Miss A sleeps through, im not lying LOL and i dont let her cry (i have a couple of times but there is a difference between crying and screaming iykwim) Miss A self settles, she WONT go to sleep in my arms anymore :( so i have to put her down but she rarely cries if ever.
You are doing a fantastic job. you truelly are. i admire what an awesome job your doing. im slack compared to most of you ladies lol.
and of course you can come in here and have a vent :) thats what we are here for, dont worry i sometimes worry what you guys think when i post things about DH, so i dont post in here anymore. Ive joined another thread (that im a little ashamed to be in im sad to say) but they have been alot of help and it saves you guys worrying about me :)
anyway gotta go, Miss A is crackin it,
xxx
Rach - I know that vent was partially towards my massive vent about my MG post. I've said to MANY people before that I don't believe that every single one of their babies sleeps that much - there's nothing saying that there are babies that sleep through the night, but I was saying that out of the 12 women in my MG (not including me) about 10 of them say that their bub sleeps 7-7 without a wake up (or 1 wake up and they go back to sleep) which I find a load of bull$h!t.. If only 2 or 3 of them said that their bub did, I'd applaud them and ask their tips.
It's also the reason I barely post in here anymore - is because I'm not feeling right myself and seeing other people saying great things bout their bub makes me feel like cr@p, and I've always lived by the rules 'If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all' - Well, except for a 'well done for how well Luke is doing' I've got nothing nice to say (that sounds bad, but I'm talking bout nothing nice to say on my side of thing) because I'm honestly struggling here and I've had nothing I've been happy about for a few weeks now.
But, if you wanna know, this is how everything is going here...
We've changed NOTHING out of the ordinary with DS routine, we're doing the same stuff that we did before and he's completely changed.
Also the fact that he doesn't settle during the day for me to do ANYTHING around the house, my self esteem is low because of how horrible the house looks (me sitting on the computer is the only way he settles during the day), he doesn't sleep during the day - today was a massive fluke! He slept from 12:30pm till 2pm with me and it's the first time he's done that for about 3 weeks.
Whenever I leave the room and leave him with DH - even for just one minute, he crys up a storm - I've literally not had a shower for 3 days because DS cries whenever he can't see me (and I can't put him in the bathroom with me because there's just no room)
I've had thoughts of just running away from everything, especially at the times where he wakes up at 1am and I've only been in bed for an hour because I've struggled to sleep.
My DH isn't a work away from home person, he goes to work and comes home every day.. BUT, I'm the same. He changed a nappy on Australia Day then the next time he did was the 7th of Feb when we were out. I got the line of 'I was the one that looked after him the most when he was first born' - Yeah, that was almost 4 months ago.. Who's been the one to do it now?! Out of all our bad nights, he's stayed up with him about.... 3 or 4 of them.. I'm always the one getting up to him after only an hour or two of sleep and taking him to another room when he's crying because I don't wanna wake DH up because he'll get snappy about having to work the next day (At the beginning of the summer school hoildays - the ones just gone - I said 'Great, you can help me a bit more with DS' to which he replied 'So I guess I don't get to enjoy my holidays'.. All I could say was 'Do you think that I get holidays period?!') DH doesn't feed him as often as I'd like.. But I'll just listen to everyone that says 'But your DH goes to work and comes home, he should be able to relax for a little while before he does anything' Sure, he can sit down and feed him! And baths, don't get me started.. He's never bathed him once! I've done all the bath stuff, there's been a few times where we've put sorbelene cream (DS has horrible skin :() on, but not enough times for my likings... Honestly, I could go on and on with the stuff I wish DH did more with DS, but it'll be dinner time before I finish (That is one thing I give him, he does all the cooking - except for Wednesdays when I do it because he's gone out to golf)
I'm constantly feeling like $h!t when I ask DH to watch him for a minute so I can do something for myself - oh and the biggest one - DH now has hobbies that he gets to do every week.. He goes to golf every Wednesday afternoon after work with workmates, bowling Thursday nights with an old high school friend.
Granted, we do poker with William - but of course, I'm the one that has to feed him, tend to him when he's grizzly, push him around. But poker is my one day a week of sanity, it's the one day a week I get out of the house. And, even that (poker) is starting to make me feel horrible.
I remember DH saying to me one day 'You do have to remember your not a single parent' and I just said out loud - because I'd had a horrible day - 'Yeah, well it bloody feels like it sometimes'
I have quite often thought about just ringing my dad and asking him to pick us up and leaving DH a note saying 'Staying with my dad for a few days, will be back on *insert date*' but I stay because DH deserves to see his DS when he gets home from work.
Last but not least is how one day I posted something bout being over everything - and I still maintain that I am over everyone and everything, MIL was sticking up for DH saying 'He does so much more than you think' Honestly, she's making him sound like he's superdad when he does stuff all!! ARGH! I love my MIL, but when she said that, I got angry - because it makes me look like I do nothing and he does everything (and she probably thinks that too with the state of the house)
But... after all this, I love being a mother, I still love my son so much, and I know he does these things because is just a baby, but I know whenever I see him smile, he loves me too... and that's all that matters to me right now. I just hate how down and $h!t I'm feeling all the time
I might as well just shut up and keep out of threads where I obviously upset people.. Man, it makes me feel like I'm in MG all over again.
And now, I shall be off - because in the time I've written this, I probably could have been doing the dishes because DS is now starting to get agitated. I don't know if I'll be back in, especially since I make people uncomfortable, but we'll see.
oh LJ :hug: you poor thing. Your notmaking anyone uncomfortable sweetheart!!
Youve had a rough time i can see that, and im so sorry. I wish i could make it all better :comfort:
Regarding your DH, im not much help on that front. i mean, you all know the dramas i have with mine. and trust me even though he's home for a week 24/7 he still does NOTHING. he's changed DD maybe 3 times in her life. fed her once and has yet to bath her. i try to puch these things because she wont be a baby forever and i dont want him to miss out. and i know how you feel, doing it all your own :( ive also realised its best NOT to say anything to MIL about DH coz its her son of course she's going to stick up for him.
Sounds to me like you need some 'you' time. i wish we lived closer, id make sure you got some ;) men just dont get it. if they just pulled their finger out and did something everyone now and then. id be happy if DH just took over Bath times, all he's have to do is get in the freakin shower with her. THATS IT!! id get her out and dressed. as it stands now i have to wheel her changetable into the bathroom, have a shower with her, put her on the change table while i quikly finish in the shower (i know im a terrible mother- she hasnt learnt to roll yet but as soon as she does i wontbe doing it this way anymore) i mean he cant even take her out of the shower and just put a nappy on her til i get out GRRR..
if we cant come here to vent.. what hope have we got.
please dont feel like your in your MG (ps i kinda feel the same in mine) we're all here for you and supporting you. and i know im still super slack at replying to every detail of someones post but its so hard to find time to post these days.
if you ever need to chat , im here. ok. please dont leave the group.\
Tell Murry to take William for a drive somewhere, to his parents place or something to give you some alone time, even if you just sleep, it will do the world of good.
and your being a fantastic Mum, youve had such a rough time, and your doing wonderfully, i havent even been through half as much and have almost fallen apart a few times. i envy you sweetheart, i hope im as strong as person as you are when the time comes xxx
LJ I wasn't having a go at you it was the replies you received from other people was one of my triggers .......... I started to message you on FB to give you a heads up but my comp froze and well I got lost in the day so to speak, please please no I wasn't having a go at you ... :comfort: I'm sorry if you think I was...honest to god swear on my life... I hate hearing how sad you are I wish I lived over there and could just get you and william bring you home and let you sleep....
I was having a bad day, a friend IRL is actually what started how I was feeling, I made a comment about a 3am wake up and well she basically told me to suck it up... I was like WTF!!!!!!
anyway I am so sorry if I have upset you that truly was not my intent :hug: please dont leave
and you miss stevie, of course we all worry thats what belly buddies is about, feel free to vent about jon here... when we make comments or replies it because we care
ok I have said enough of to agnes tomorrow again I am sorry.............please forgive me
Hey girls,
Rach - I understand where you're coming from. I don't post much anymore either (in here or the other group) cause Miss A seems to be doing everything right (and she does sleep through. She's up for 10 - 15 minutes for a feed about 3 then back to bed till 6:30) and I don't want to make other people doubt what they're doing, even though no one has ever said anything to me (if that makes sense). My BF from highschool has a 7 week old who isn't sleeping well at night and I've actually had her tell me she hates me (in a loving sort of way) when I say ALyssa slept such and such last night. I even thought twice about telling her she giggled on Tuesday because her DS isn't smiling yet.
Stevie - of course you can vent about Jon here. That's what we're all here for and trust me, if DH didn't do what he did I would be!!! I still do whinge to Mum about him and he does some of the housework and at least 1 nappy most days. and helps with bathtimes and helps settle her most nights. Makes me realise I shouldn't whinge so much....... Must make that my new years resolution :)
LJ - There are going to be times for all of us when everything feels like too much. I haven't had to deal with half as much as you and I was still driving home from a massgae the other day wondering if I could just drive around for another hour or so while DH had Alyssa (and how long it would be before he rang me to find me). Motherhood is such a demanding 24/7 job and I don't think any new mum realises what they're getting in for when they fall pregnant. I know I wasn't. Not sure what I was expecting but it wasn't the huge responsibility that is being a Mum. MIL's will always stick up for their sons. Mine is exactly the same...... I dared have a whinge about the amount of time he's out (Squash Thursday night, Cricket training Friday night and then Cricket half a day Saturday and beers afterwards) and her response was that he needed some out time. Should have seen the look I got when I asked when I got mine :wall:. Last time I try that!! Is there someone in your mother group or maybe your MIL that could give you a break for a couple of hours??? Or talk to the CHN and see what support is around for you. I'm sure there would be something! Don't leave us!! We're all here to help!!
LJ and Stevie - you are both inspirational. I know I couldn't do it without the help I get from DH and my Mum. You should both be so proud of yourselves and what you do every day. I heard a quote the other day that if a Mum gets one job around the house done each day she's a supermum. So decide what your one job is and feel good about getting that done. Remember that the dust will be there next week, month or year but our little bubbas are growing up before our eyes!!!!
LJ,
Please don't leave us! You don't make any of us uncomfortable and we are more than happy to be a sounding board for you whenever you need to vent... you will feel much better if you get it out rather than try to keep it in.
By the sounds of it things have been very tough for you but please just try to remember that despite all this your beautiful little boy is worth it... as you said, his smiles make it all worthwhile.
I can't offer too much advice on the baby front because i am new to all this too. But (and i am very truthful here) all i know is that i had a baby who did sleep from 8pm - 5:30am without waking, and now i have a baby who wakes at about 2am every night. I have spoken with a few other mums and all our bubs seemed to have changed atm.... little W is not alone and you are not alone with it stressing you out. For the moment i have put it down to Eli's gums being sore, but perhaps their sleeping patterns have just changed?
As for your DH - i think we can all relate to frustrations on that front. My DH has a marine fish tank and before E was here he would spend an hour or 2 each afternoon on it (it's a big tank) but now i need his help for my sanity each afternoon when he gets home so he doesn't get the same amount of time to spend on it. After much discussion he is selling the tank and getting a tank half the size so he can help more.
I know it's hard but can you talk with your DH to try and help him understand that you need more assistance than you are getting? The only tip i can offer here is not to get defensive when you talk to him (i made that mistake the first time)... be calm and rational and just try to explain that you need the help and a break for your own happiness and benefit.
LJ, not sure if you can do this, but i have a friend who gives her baby to her DH on Friday afternoon when he gets home from work and the DH has to look after bub (including bath her, feed her, play, get her ready for bed and get up to her during the night) until Saturday morning when my friend wakes up. She doesn't go out anywhere, but she just gets time to herself to relax.... is you can do this you might find this helps to relieve the stress you are feeling?
Enough from me - but i am very sorry if i have offended or upset you (i certainly have never meant to) and you don't make me feel uncomfortable so please stay with us!
Hi to everyone out there and i will be back later.
x.
BTW - what is MG? What is RAK?
Sorry - i am useless!