This is my story I have up on another forum I thought I would share it here

On monday we went along to our ultrasound but sadly the lady could not find anything in my uterus. As soon as my uterus came up on the screen I just knew there was something wrong but I was hoping inside that the lady would find something. But she didn't, so she did an internal and there something didn't feel right in my right ovary. She printed off several pictures and took them away to show the specialist and he suspected an ectopic pregnancy. When she came back she basically sent us straight to the emergency room. Luckily we didn't have to wait long as the people had rang up my GP who rang up the hospital to let them know what was going on.

One of the most horrible things they did was when they moved me from emergency to the maternity ward (why do they do that to women who miscarry?). When Trent left me to go home I cried and cried. All I could hear was newborns crying, all I could see was new to be mums in labour walking around. It just hurt so much coz this time I KNEW that I wasn't going to be getting my bub. It hurt knowing that while these ladies were leaving hospital WITH their babies, I was going to be leaving with nothing

Thankfully they moved me to new ward where they really looked after me I had surgery on tuesday morning. It was so scary coz I had never had surgery before. But it went well. They kept the tube which meant it hadn't ruptured. But we still had lost bub. I really do not wish it on ANYONE, it was so painful, it still is painful even though I'm home now. It hurt too much to get out of bed. While in hospital I didn't know what I was feeling, I still don't. I don't think it really has hit me yet. But it will soon I bet. One thing that gets me (which I hope is normal and I hope it doesn't make me selfish) is that I look at girls I know (same age as me or older) who are pregnant or just had a bub and I wonder why not them? Why me? One girl I know in particular, shes due in the 2 months, but she smokes and still drinks. I know its up to the individual but I gave up that lifestyle for my bub, so why did I have to lose it? Why not my friend who just doesn't seem to give a damn? Does anyone else feel like that?

I found out today as well that I may have trouble conceiving later on (possibly might have to use IVF) and there's a higher chance an ectopic pregnancy can happen again. We aren't going to TTC for while now. I want to start uni and want us up in Brisbane and settled down and wait till we're both emotionally ready to do it. I'm just so scared of when I get pregnant again it will happen again

Bubba was taken away on the 1st of April 2008