Hi Baby Fever 2007,
Firstly I am so sorry for your loss. Its such an awful time! You just never think it'll happen to you. I also have just miscarried. I had an awful time emotionally and physically. I definitely would advise you to go and see your GP. Physically-I am hoping you have finished bleeding. One of the most important things to ensure is that there is no more conception products left in the uterus. If there is you can get more bleeding and infection. Its so different for everyone so yes it may be that it was only a day and a half for you. Sometimes you may need another u/s to ensure this, I'd actually be pushing your doc to allow you to have an u/s-just so then you know. Emotionally time time time, friends, family. I found this site really helpful, just to know there are so may others that understand.
Also your concerns with the D&C, I can only give you my experience, but after the D&C I felt so much better, no pain, tiny amount of bleeding. As I work in the health industry, and worked a few years in anaesthetics I was probably more scared about the anesthetic side of things then the D&C. As far as looking at it solely on anaesthetic point of view, its pretty much as straight forward for them as it gets. Don't be scared of the ET tube, you won't remember it. Might have a bit of a sore throat.
Although it sounds lame just take it day by day. But definitely get medical advise. Write down all your questions and take them in.
My thoughts are with you. xox
Babyfever,
What horrible news, I am afraid to say the pain will ease but never leave, I misscarried in June of last year and still struggle to come to turns to why it happened. There are so many varying factors that I'll never know why and I think that's the hardest part, I found that the sight of a pregnant belly would put me to tears and I was truely devestated to find out about 6 months later my sister in law was expecting! I will always have my angel in my heart and that's something that will never be taken from me!
As for the D&C I was lucky that i didn't have to have one, I was 9.5 weeks along at the time of miscarring, but I also had extremly heavy bleed. I did have to have check ups with the hospital and my Gp to make sure everything was ok.
I'll be thinking of you as you face the next few days as they'll be the hardest and remember your angel will always be with you!
Keep your chin up hun and look after yourself!!!!!
babyfever - I have seen a few of your posts over the past few weeks so it makes me really sad to be reading this one today.
Life is just cruel sometimes. I've had 2 x m/c and it is just something that no-one should have to go through. For me the pain will always be there but I have just learnt how to cope from day to day. My first m/c was nearly two years ago and I still get sad and upset when I think about it. I agree with you though, i didn't want to get pg again to make up for our loss, I just wanted that baby back.
I had a d&c after both m/c because they were both incomplete (second was missed so I only knew I miscarried when I went for u/s). I was really scared the first time as I'd never been under aneasthetic before but it was ok. Second time I wasn't scared I was just devastated.
I've since done some tests (to find out 'why') and the only thing found was a uterine polyp which was removed, but that still may not be the reason I lost those two bubs. Hopefully this time we're third time lucky but I still worry.
Sending you a million . Don't set yourself a time limit, just take each day as it comes. You'll find you will eventually have a more good days among the bad days... they will become more frequent and more happier but it will take time. But you will always have a special place in your heart for your angel.
i know exactly what you are going through love. The pain and tormented thoughts about a bub that you want so much but never got to carry, birth and love. I was informed that i had miscarried at about 7 weeks when the sac was empty at a routine u/s and that was 7 weeks ago. I would have been about 14weeks pregnant with a nice little baby bump by now but it was meant to happen. I still grieve for my bub (and i have tears in my eyes as i am typing this) 7 weeks on. I was thinking of her (i wished for it to be a little girl) yesterday, driving and spoke out loud, hoping that she'd hear me and how i missed her so much, my dear little baby Zara, wanted by no-one but me (she was unplanned). i don't think you can set a grievance time. You will always think of your little bub, sometimes at the most unexpected times. I don't think i can ever forget her. She was truly my last chance at having bub#3 as hubby wanted and still wants no more kids.
I agree with Tully, if the dr. says to get a D&C done, go get it done as then you will rest assured that there is no conception product left and you can start TTC for another bubs when you are ready.
You haven't done anything wrong to m/c this bub. I was always blamed for losing my little Zara through exercising or going to the heated pools or some other stupid reason. Drs told me that it was not my fault and that sometimes the female and male chromosomes (in the egg and sperm) don't communicate that well and decide abort. It's just nature telling us that the baby wouldn't have been the perfect little being that we all wish for. Try and be positive. i know it is hard. People around you might think you are stupid for crying after the loss at such an early stage of pregnancy but they don't know what you are going through. Grieving is normal. Cry all you want.
I truly wish you all the best. Try and be positive...
I just wanted to say I'm sorry to hear about everyones losses. I wish that there were no such things as Misscarrages or anything in this world like that.
I have the blame on myself that I did to much activity at MonkeyBuisness kids place on that Wednesday & I sit and think to myself why did I my self while pregnant let my self play on air things that you can jump on and lift up my kids just to let them go down the slids... (I feel sooo stupid)...
I miss my bubs so much, I have a strong feeling it would have been a boy that I long dreamed of.
I want to give everyone I don't know how you all get through it, its so hard but I'm sure that I will be able to make it soon. I hope to be strong..
I am so sorry for your loss of little baby bean. I just really feel for you and wanted to send some big hugs your way, because I know that you need and deserve them!
I also wanted to extend my deepest support that there was nothing that you did wrong. It's easier said than done, I know. I spent an age trying to work out what I could have done differently when I had my loss, but ultimately, sometimes, these things are just unexplainable.
When I fell pregnant the second time, I didnt realise for 6 weeks (irregular cycle etc). During this time was Christmas and NY. Champagne was drunk, soft cheeses eaten to the max, and somehow, my little buddah bub leila made it. When i did the pregnancy test and realised I was pregnant I had all this fear of losing her and losing another baby, but as the weeks went on I realised that some bubs just make it, and it made me feel more at peace with my first loss. there was nothing that I did wrong, she just wasn't meant to be (i also had a feeling about the gender!).
Your 'little bean' will always be in your heart. No-one can take that away from you! Give yourself time to deal with this in the way you need. And be rest assured that us girls (and guys!) will be here to support you and share your journey. and also, you are one of the strong ones. you don't have to hope, just know.
BF,
I know the guilt. I've felt guilty too but just remember you did not cause your mc through playing on kids equipment. look at all the celebs.. they jog, run and do allsorts of things. Nicole Kidman was still jogging/running at 5 months preg. Angelina Jolie was carrying around Shiloh and Zahara to the day she popped out her twins. I think Mother Nature has designed our bodies to protect our bubs when we do heavy lifting or runabout.
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