Hi - This is actually my job!

DO you have a will??? In a will you can appoint a guardianship clause, the guardianship clause is not legally binding, however if something does happen to you and your partner at the time ( if he has not legally adopted your son) goes for custody they will look at your Will and atleast it will give them some idea of what you would of wanted.

If you died without a Will (intestate) then your son owuld automatically go to his father - unless his father said no to having him, then it would go to the Gaurdianship Board for them to decide.

I think you actually have to worry more about where you would want your son to go if something happened to both you and your partner at the same time, its horrible to say but you really need to have what we call a "total Wipe-out clause" when people have young families they normally travel in the car or where ever/how ever they are going somewhere it is more than likely together.

It is one of the biggest arguments in my office and DH and I even argued about it, I wanted one thing he thought another idea was better.

I don't deal in adoption though - so i'm no help to you now

MAKE SURE YOU DO A WILL!!!! that is my main advice to you, not for the fact of where your money is going to go but mainly for that guardianship clause - its the only way that your actual opinion on the matter of where your son should end up will actually be heard!