Aspergers/Autism/Sensory Integration Chatter

[MBP_Mum]

Saram ~ Thank you for your relpy and ideas. I will start writting things down to take with me, Kindy have started a behavioural book for him. Good points and bad points he has done through out the day. He is only going 1/2 days at the moment as he can't handle being there all day. (Or they can't handle him)

Christy ~ Thank you for your reply also. I'll let you know how the family daycare thing goes, he don't handle change to well, so it will be intresting if we can get into one.

Have a wonderful day everyone

[christy]

MBP_mum - yeah change is painful....

Nicky- Welcome! yep... I went for years being told that I was a bad parent... so its lovely to come somewhere that people understand experiences and feelings associated with parenting these super kids.

Honestly though.... sometimes I don't feel like they are super....

Matilda has had a high temp for almost 24 hours now and is relatively normal! Strange... No signs of sickness, just the high temp. She fell asleep on the lounge and *whammo* wee'd all over... litres of wee! She woke up and had wee in her hair so I hope the smell comes out. I put her in the shower and ran around like a chook trying to get the seat covers in the wash and the cushions on the line to air out. Too bad it went through the cushions onto the base... which is totally saturated. Worse is, she's totally humiliated and embarrased about it. Poor thing.

[MBP_Mum]

He had a great day at kindy today. They one put him in time out once today. He even looked happier than usually when i picked him up, in his kindy class there is only 10 kids. So i think it is easier for him to cope with. I think to myself i just can't wait to get to the pead appointment, if he isn't diagnosed with anything that awesome, but if he is there is help out there for him/us.

Here are a few signs that had got me thinking why he needs to see a pead.

He has these small bakugan balls and cards they have to been in his pocket all the time, if he loses one all hell breaks loose, he will search for hours crying and distraught, he will wear himself out to the point where he falls asleep, he will then wake up looking for them.(no matter how long he slept for)
I changed his pillow case to a new colour, it was the wrong thing to do.
He has to wears shorts with pockets.
He won't share his food, his drink bottle is his.
When they have a specail treat we go to hungry jacks, and has a happy meal he is used to the yellow box the meal comes in, this day he didn't get a yellow box as they didn't have any, so it was put into a bag. Worst thing ever, he was so distraught that is wasn't how it was supposed to be.
He likes to play alone a lot, and always sits in the back corner of the kindy room, plays alone in the playground.
Will occasionally interact with other kids.
Has difficulty calming himself down after being upset.
He put his hands overs his ears and curls up when his baby brother cries, i am vacuuming or the kids in kindy are singing.
His speech as i said is that of a 2 to 2.5yr old
He hates certain food textures and often gags on it.
Hates having dirty hands or food spilt on him.
Avoids eye contact with anyone.
Gets very tired quickly.
Loves my soft dressing gown loves to go to sleep wrapped in or or sits and watches TV with it wrapped around him.

These are just a few of the things i have written down to take to pead with me. Thank you if you got this far.

[christy]

That list is perfect. It identifies a few areas that are specific in the diagnosis of ASD

[maz]

OMG you could have blown me over hon!!! this so sounds like my guy!!

Wilhelm ONLY wears shorts...if its 5 degree's its shorts and t-shirt......no jumper no long pants in the good old Vic winters near the snow land. and yes have to have pockets!!!

We use to have the same problems with Macca's...my solution was to leave an empty macca's box in the glove box, just incase and it worked for us.

OMG I just wish I could sit with you over a cuppa and chat about what yourve just posted MBP! The colour thing....yes went through that and you know what...I know that the early ed's try to make you get them to stop and change and get them to do things 'socially correct' but god is it really that bad to leave a red shirt on a kid instead of putting a blue one on???? I think these people in the early ed programs mean so well...but they dont see our kids everyday and only hear and see the bad things....they dont see the special look they give you when they think no one is watching.....the joy you get when they do come up to you and hug you out of the blue. Ive learnt that yes, we have to get them to adapt to things for normality but they are also individuals and not animals that need taming. That is my biggest grip about a special needs kid...i somethimes feel like I need to have a whip and beat them into shape....I also feel very much under the microscope as a mother which annoys me no end. God dame it...we are trying our best to do the best we all can...why do people think we are trying so hard to work against them? arhhhhh

Christy - thank you honey Matilda and WIlhelm sound like a good couple as WIlhlem is known for telling me things 6 months after the fact. He told me in the car again today that im never aloud to push him as it hurts his brain and it dies... ...get some glen 20 hon...it gets rid of wee smell and when Wilhelm gets embarrassed over things like weeing and poohing himself...I jsut say to him...say by by naught wee.....you didnt have to come out and surprise me..and make a silyl song about it...Just a thought thats all babe

Nicky - welcome to the mad house this sounds so stupid...but I feel like I could walk around naked in here and everyone would be cool with it (and me naked is a VERY scarey thing). Make sure when you feel crapola that you come in here and down load (says someone who runs lol)

Sarah - how is the DS going? Ours has taken a back seat to friggen lego again...i should be happy I hear you say...not when I keep finding lego men heads in Mateauz poohy nappies hahahhahah

SO knock on wood..no wet bed for 2 weeks....since we changed the room around things have been ont he up (thank good) I should take a pic and put it in the gallery to show you guys 'his space'..jed says he's goong to move into it their room...oh I wish..a Qbed for me is my dream..hahaha

OK written a long enough novel...going to go do some stress release...good old sewing

be kind to yourselves

[~Saram~]

MBP - great list. If you want some ideas for now check out sue larky's website and tony Atwood also for some good strategies.

Maz - DS isn't working very well at the moment which has lent to a few meltdowns, DH is hoping to have fixed it this time but I have to say he is back mainly to pretend mode - hmmmm. I am OVER pretend mode - am I allowed to say that, it sounds horrible but I am OVER IT.

School sux - have I mentioned that... Luckily got there just before he went nuts on a kid who 'stole' his Math game for homework. Went in to talk to the teacher and she says "did he take it again after I spoke to him" "Yes" Xander blurts out in snotty sobs hiding under his desk. So teacher goes out to talk to child and returns to tell Xander that he has to take the other game as child has had that one already and that's why he kept taking Xanders. Xander says "I know he has had it but you gave it to me" "oh well" she says and walks off with a pat on the head leaving me to deal with this little boy who has a very set idea on justice and what is right. It took about 2 hrs for him to pull himself back together again and much trampolne jumping - poor little thing and then we had to play the dam game tonight and it set it all off again. Grrr

Christy - Hope matilda is feeling better soon.

[christy]

oh Sarah! OMG... How incredibly frustrating. You must have wanted to pull the teacher by the hair.... ARGHHHH!!!!! She obviously doesn't understand him. That makes me sad. I know a lot of you mammas have issues with teachers and aides etc... no wonder so many ASD mums homeschool. Personally, I couldn't do it... but you never know how far a mum will go to protect her children.

and you know what? You are allowed to say you are over it here

Me, us... Matilda has been a perfect child at school. She does exactly what she is supposed to do, is playing with the other children... is the only child in school not to have a melt down at school. someone stole my child! BUT then she gets home... and has the meltdown for a few hours at home. I finally got to talk with the OT about it & she gave me some things to help. She totally expected that Matilda would be good at school and disolve on the way home. So we have cd's to play in the car, while eating crunchy snacks.... apparently this counters some of the auditory stuff from having to listen all day. Than straight onto the trampoline before going inside. Then a brushing once inside and then a lukewarm bath before dinner.... and you know what? It worked. Its a huge effort, and work for us to do it with the whole after school, making dinner and unpacking everything... but its easier without the screaming.

[maz]

WTF!!!!! Sarah - go to the principal honey! If the teacher doesnt listen or brushes shiat of with Wilhelm I go to the principal. That is disgusting behaviour from a teacher. She does know he's on the spectrum doesnt she? How can she do that!!!!! fark im angry now. Let me at her and I'll pat her head!!!!

PMSL - Prentend mode...i think thats the mode in the male structure of our house atm aswell....

[christy]

Did I mention what DH said when we were in the assessment with the OT?? "I just don't want to think that there is anything wrong with her" the OT said "So, do you think there is something "wrong" with her?" and he said "No"

Now though, he's been going to OT with her and doing the exercises... they are getting there.

[~Saram~]

Firstly thank you all for being hear to talk too!

Christy - yes Xander is similar - lets it all build up and then we cop the meltdown. I like your routine, we do similar but I think I might start being a bit more routine about the routine and see if it helps. As for your DH comment I have a friend at OT who's hubby is at the same place, my heart goes out to you. I'm pleased he is getting involved in the therapy - that's awesome

teacher - yes I do want to scream at her but have contolled myself - just. Did I tell you she also went from letting them into the room to making them line up - in week 3 - no notice just a note on the door that said students must now line up in two lines until 8:40, parents must supervise. (I am checking with the school as to policies with this as I think they have a supervised before school place) anyway of course Xander chucked a wobbly becasue they don't line up before school, only after morning tea and lunch. Grrr. Now we get there just on the bell and she is making him get a late note! OMGoodness. Today I got there on the bell, as in the bell rang as I walked through the front gate and the whole class had already gone up to assembly - I just don't get it. Anyway I am rambling, thank you for letting me get that off my chest. We have an interview set up for next week and I'm going to ask the special needs teacher to be there also.

Anyways better go sleep and prepare for the weekend :-)

[MBP_Mum]

. If you want some ideas for now check out sue larky's website and tony Atwood also for some good strategies.

Are you able to pm me websites, if you are not allowed to post here.


P.S When does this verification thing leave? and when can i view someones profile to send them a PM ?

[~Saram~]

MBP - I think it goes on post counts - maybe 20? It's just to stop random people signing up and Pm everyone with spam.

As for the websites try sue larkey with all the other stuff and it's an australian site so those letters on the end

For tony attwood same thing

Another good one is aspect.

Sorry I can't pm yo, go on a posting spree :-)

[christy]

Yeah just google Sue Larkey separately from Tony Attawood. Fantastic resources.

[~Saram~]

OK we are having a BAD day today - well actually all weekend - I need help!

We went to Church today which he normally loves but finished up rocking at my feet - then we had to shop - had my purse stolen and DH refused to shop alone so we ALL had to go. We had coffee first and the kids had a babycino he is having lots of oral issues and ended up spilling/spitting his drink all over himself as he keeps overfilling his mouth. then just sat in it and didn't tell anyone - so all his pants and shirt are soaked. The nwe start shopping and he has the repetition going on saying the same things over and over. Ahhh. I got him to push the trolley and put the heavy things in - which is suppose to help with sensory but he just ended up in tears. Then he needed to go to the toilet, waited too long to tell us and wet his pants - I'm sure you know how that ended up.

So we are home and he just keep saying things over and over again, his verbal skills are so low at the moment it sounds like he has had a stroke - all his words running into each other, stutter is back in full force , he can't sit still, won't go jump, he is on the rolly ball at the moment but just keeps crashing into the walls or the floor and screaming! OMGoodness. We are suppose to be going for photos today - he just thinks we are going for a play on the beach - what am I going to do. I have no idea what has set this all off.

[maz]

Ive been talking to our career andt he workers who have wilhelm thruday and friday. It seems when our kids go through normal groweths that its like the wiring gets crossed and all hell brakes lose. To much going on chemically in the brain and blah melt downs!!!!

Christy - Jed is tarted very much with teh same brush as your DH....I think its because they arent with the kids all the time but astill its no excuse. drives me insane!

Saram - I probably would be leaving him athome until this meetnig andI'd be a really cow about it and ring the school tomorrow and let the principal know that you cant send him to school when the teacher is being uncooprotive with his needs. Its not as if he's doing it to be difficult....why cant she think!!! Does she have children??? Is so nice for the teachers..the kids are wonderful for them at school but what about at home...when we have them back...do they realise how much they play with our kids heads???? grrrr

Ive gotta get an appointment with Richard Isanhower (I think thats how its spelt)..he is the best in Vic appartently...hmmmm

We for a change have been having a good week (knock on wood). We went to the bakery for lunch today and Wilhelm was so happy..little steps again. We have also noticed having the small laptop is working great as he can google stuff ect and have a bit of down load...after 1/2 an hour he's happy and turns it of and puts it away.

Gotta get him to help me with the roast chicken in a min....this is gonna be interesting

[MBP_Mum]

Saram ~ ((HUGE HUGS)) to you hun, if only you knew what set things of, it would all be so much easier to deal with.

Well we gave K a haircut this morning and OMG, it was like i was trying to kill him, he got so upset during the cut he fell asleep for 20mins after. He was so concerned about the hair we cut off.

[maz]

MBP - I hate giving Wilhelm hair cuts...we got through the same thing here ... I let his hair grown for over a year this timeuntil I had enough. Im made him a deal....he likes to feel in control of the situation so I give him to choices of what I want him to do and he picks which on...win win in the house so out last hair cut went like this

me - can i cut your hair Wilhelm

W - No i need my hair to cover my ears cause their sore

me - well if you get a hair cut you can pick between going for a big swim in the pool or playing the DS

W - ok...cut my hair I want a big swim

while we were cutting his hair...I kept saying...bye bye hair grow back soon - say bye bye to your old hair baby, everytime it fell into the bath...(I let him sit on the edge of the bath and just throw the hair in it) he thought it was funny and it worked!!!

I also blow on the back of his neck every now and then and he giggles.

[christy]

Isn't it funny how something like a haircut takes such energy and precision to get it right? I was telling someone how hard it was to get Matilda's hair cut and she said "oh yeah... its so hard isn't it?" and I want to tell her how it really is for some of us. I get so frustrated I want to scream! You don't know what its like. You try to take my child to the shop to pick up some milk on my way over...