Naenae, I had a bit of a tough time when I first had my two. For the first 6mths of DS's life I honestly struggled. I had undiagnosed AND/PND though, and when I had DS it just got worse. Plus I didn't have much help from family/friends unless I asked. And with severe sleep deprivation thrown in there too, I was pretty miserable for a while. My DH did what he could which was/is alot compared to many, but there's only so much he could do since he works full time and shift work at that! But now I wouldn't have it any other way. If I was well mentally, I think I would have loved having my babies so close. I am really enjoying them now, they're so much fun and they really do adore each other.
On the practical side, having a second new born was easier because I knew what to do. DS was also a bit easier and wasn't as fussy as DD was, so was just an easier baby.
When they were both crying and we were all having a bad day, I would try to get out of the house and go to my mums or a friends house. Then I wouldn't be so cooped up and would have a little respite. There were two or three occaisions when I called my mum and/or DH in sobbing tears begging them to come and help me. Once they came and put things into perspective, it was all ok and I could see it wasn't so bad!
I want to go back and have number 3, so it hasn't done too much damage to my psyche!!
This is a great thread, so helpful. I am going to have 2 under 2 (ds will be 22 months old when bubba #2 is born) and i am petrified about it. I have days when i just think oh my, what have i done?? I noticed that alot of you mention that you use child care a day or two a week, how do you that dont use any child care cope?? We dont use child care and dh is not keen on the idea and i just worry that i wont cope with two munchkins at home all the time.
I have 2 that are 21 months apart and it was ALOT easier than I ever imagined.
DD just fit straight in to the family dynamic... like she'd always been here.
DS harboured zero jealousy towards her.
I knew exactly what I was doing with DD so there was alot less newborn baby stress.
I live in an isolated area, no child care at all. We head to playgroup once a week.
Perfect age gap for us. I couldn't imagine timing it any better at all.
Beautide, I didn't use childcare and it was tough. My house was rarely tidy let alone clean, it is only now really that I am managing to get on top of that side of things and DS is 1 1/2! I had good support from DH who would let me sleep if I was desperate, but he needed his sleep because he has to work in a job that he can't really be tired for. If we could have afforded one day a week childcare for DD I probably would have taken up the chance.
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