Have you investigated food allergies/intolerances? Any in your families?

Forshelby, you're not a failure, you're a mother trying to parent a high-needs baby all on your own. You need physical assistance. I know you don't have family around and your DH does what he can, but that really is the crux of your problem I think. Can you talk to your CHN or GP about support services for parents in need? There must be something out there for parents all on their own.