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Thread: Co-Sleeping - am i creating a rod for my own back??

  1. #1

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    Default Co-Sleeping - am i creating a rod for my own back??

    My 2 month old so has reflux and about 2 weeks ago when it was at its worst, the only way i could get him to sleep at night was to put him into bed with me. He didnt sleep at all during the day (still doesnt). When its not bad, he'll sleep in his bassinette but when it is bad, he's in with me. He always ends up in my bed at some stage during the night.

    Im a single mum so dont have to worry about someone else in the bed and to be honest, i quite like having him cuddled up with me! I do all the right things eg. making sure he's on top of my doona with his own blanket.

    I just wonder if its only a matter of time before he refuses to sleep anywhere but with me? At the moment, its the only way we get decent sleep at night. Im hoping once his reflux gets under control, he wont need to sleep with me.


  2. #2

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    lol caro ... sounds like you are the master of co sleeping and dealing with reflux ... but i was going to say what you did ... go with your heart ... if nixon didnt roll around in bed so much i would have him next to me all night ...

    where are the rules that say you must seperate yourself from a newborn in a cot (that looks like a cage .... ) if you want to hold and sleep together, do it , its much healthier than feeling guilty about putting them in a cot to sleep ...

    i hope that made sense ..

  3. #3

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    I had alot of probs with 2yo DD & colic. Plus alot of other things & she never slept well. I put her in her own room too late because of this - 9 months & from then on she was in our bed every night. I'd go back & forth sometimes, but I was too tired to do it properly. In the last few weeks she has come a long way all by her self. First she stopped waking up for a drink for comfort & coming into our bed & now wakes up for a drink when she's thirsty instead & instead of being around 12 or 1 in the morning it is around 5 or 5.30 am now. She started sleeping better then too. & the last few days she has also decided that she's ready to go to bed around the same time as her sister about 8.30 & go to her bed awake rather than refusing till she falls down on the loungeroom floor at 11pm. I let my girls set their own pace & they are both in their own beds & are very happy settled kids. I am really happy with the way things are now.

  4. #4

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    We don't co-sleep (we did try but DS thought it was play time!) but I know many Mums who swear by it. I say if it works for you and you are both getting better rest then go with it.

  5. #5

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    DS, DH and I were all cuddled up in to the same bed over winter and we all got a reasonable night's sleep. I was always a bit sore in the morning though, because I froze in to one spot and didn't move the whole night. But DS slept well and so did DH.

    I got a bit jack of it after a while and we encouraged DS to sleep in his cot - which he does. 7pm to 5pm.

    I don't see anything wrong with it, but if you do want to teach him to sleep in his own bed later on, that takes a strong will.

    I reckon it's whatever you feel like doing. If I didn't have to freeze in to one spot all night, I'd co sleep, but seeing as I'm back at work now I have to have a better quality of sleep - which I don't get worrying about squashing DS.

  6. #6

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    Thanks guys! You all seem to agree with me!

    Lestypuss i agree- i do freeze in one spot all night and am a bit sore for it in the mornings. It also surprises me sometimes how much DS manages to burrow his face into me so much and still be able to breathe! So i agree, its not the most relaxed sleep but its still sleep and i love to wake up and see his face just centimetres from mine!

    Caro did you find that co-sleeping helped with reflux? Maybe its just my imagination but i swear it makes him 10 times calmer when he's in bed with me.

    It feels a little bit like giving in and taking the easiest way out, especially at 4am when i dont have the energy to settle him. But, i must admit i do fall asleep with a big smile on my face!

  7. #7

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    awww your not giving in nor are you taking the easist way out .....

    you are doing the mummy thing .... who would want to snuggle with a bub if they knew it made them feel 10 times better ..

    your doing a great job and Toby is a cool name !!

  8. #8

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    I used to love waking up in the morning and just looking at Daniel in the morning light. He'd be asleep but he was just so beautiful and peaceful. I don't get that when he's in a cot.

    If that feeling is a "rod for your own back" - bring it on.

  9. #9

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    Thank you, i feel much better! It's a pretty special thing really isnt it? And in the scheme of things, its something that wont last for very long at all so i should just enjoy it while i can and not feel guilty!

  10. #10

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    do whatever works and be glad that there is something that works... sometimes what works one week doesn't the next, and then you are stuffed!! ;-)

    enjoy your baby - they grow up so fast and you never know, you might get an independant little fellow who at 6 months refuses cuddles and the likes and you will be glad you had all that time in bed with him...

    i think you have to do whatever it is that is most important to you... if everyone getting enough sleep is most important (i think this is the case for everyone!!) then do whatever enables you all to get the most sleep... if him sleeping in his cot is most important to you then try to get him to sleep in his cot. but at the end of the day im sure sleep wins over anything so just do whatever works and pat yourself on the back for finding something that works and comforts him so he can sleep. reflux sucks i know all about it.

  11. #11

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    I co-sleep with Jovie, she starts in her cot & when she wakes she comes into bed with me. I love it, she loves it & we all sleep better. No rods in my back just a better rested family.

  12. #12

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    Emma, thank you for your reply. I just saw something you said about Koo Wee Rup sleep school. Im going on the 19th Nov and was wondering how that will go when he has reflux to start with? Did you end up going?

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