Coping issues, toddler and baby. Strategies needed PLEASE

[skeetaboat]

1......How do you stay positive? Get some *me* time every week, go to the gym, shopping, get hair done, visit a friend, anything that gets me out and about by myself. You've gotta schedule it to make sure it happens. I'd be having some words with DH if he's a) not helping you when he's not working and b) hogging the weekends
2......What do you do when you're toddler doesnt sleep in the arvo - to keep them from sending you batty? Without the square eyed babysitter! My toddler (same age) has been refusing naps for about 6 months. If he's really driving me batty I go for a driveat about 3pm and it never fails to put him to sleep. We've discovered the sesame street website which has some *fantastic* toddler games, which he *loves* so it's like a treat for him and I can use it as a bargaining chip!! It's not as bad as the square eyed babysitter because the games are interactive & educational. You do have to show them how to do it at first, but now that my DS has the hang of it, it can buy me up to 2 hours of peace (probably more if I would let him!). Other than that I'll snuggle with him on the couch with a DVD and stroke his hair and sometimes he'll nod off, but if not, we both get a rest
3......How do you encourage 'quiet time' and playing by self without constantly entertaining, redirecting?see above! colouring is another hit around here for quiet time and so is hanging out in the bedroom listening to music
4......What strategies do you use when your toddler won't do what you need them to? (I'm talking need, not want - like getting into a car seat to drive the car) When there is no compromise, be firm. Keep doing whatever it is (ie strapping her in) say what you have to do and why but don't say anything else or engage in argument. But try to pre-empt these co-operatation strikes. My DS always seems to be uncooperative when I've rushed him, or haven't listened to him, or didn't let him have some involvement in what's happening. I think communication is the key here & making sure they feel involved in whatever you're doing & not pushed around.
5......How do you help your toddler understand a routine change or change of plans? hmm, not sure what you mean? Without knowing what you're referring to, I'd just say generally that I think communication is the key. At this age they like to know what's going on and why, so the more you tell them, the more they understand and can go with the flow (or express their discontent, which you can choose to take on board or at the very least acknowledge & explain why X still has to happen). I think negotiation & communication really are so vital to happy toodler & therefore happy mumma, at this age