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Thread: HELP! A few things..

  1. #1

    Join Date
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    Default HELP! A few things..

    1) When was your bub able to use a spoon? Abs is almost 14 months and just wont do it..

    2) how do you get your baby to stop smacking! where do babies learn to smack if they have never been smacked before... its really upsetting because she has picked up on DF and I saying "no smakcking" or "dont smack", so now she says "mack" when she does it. she does it when shes agry or doesnt get her way... and it includes smacking ppl in the FACE! She also did it to me in the supermarket when i told her to stop chewing on the trolly bar and she smacked me and a lady saw.... the lady laughed but i was so worried she would think i smack abby

    3) She HURTS herself. When shes angry or upset she will pinch her face and almost gouge her eye out. its really silly and i cant stand it. i just pull her hand away and say no, or dont hurt yourself but she still does it. is that the weirdest thign ever?

    4) Talking- she can say a lot of words and does every now and then, but most of the time she will just grunt and point. How do i encourage her to use her words? i try to get her to say what I know she can say, like water (war-war) when she wants a drink, but it alwys ends in her chucking a fit.

    Any ideas would be helpful....


  2. #2

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    1) Zander started using his spoon around his first birthday, he's a very independent little man & even before that he struggled when we fed him. He just prefers to do things himself so I'm not sure how to help on that one.

    2) Most (if not all) babies pick up smacking from *somewhere*. It seems like an automatic reaction or something Generally if Zander was on my lap or I was holding him, I'd grab his hand look him in the eyes & say "no smacking". I would then put him on the floor. When he calmed down I'd get down to his level & explain to him. "It's not nice to smack people, it hurts & makes mummy very upset. Mummy doesn't smack you does she? Noooo, so you shouldn't smack mummy either. Now give mummy a cuddle to say sorry." Then I'd pick him back up & all is good. If he did it again while I was talking to him (which he did sometimes) I'd do the same, say no & then stand back up straight & wait a minute until he had settled again. It is tough, but you need to be consistent as does everyone else. If she's with someone else & they don't do it how you want, take Abby off them & do the whole thing as you would if she had hit you. In the trolley, I would just take a step away, let her calm down & then do the same spiel. It really does work.

    3) Again I think most bubs do it. There's not a lot you can do aside from holding her hands until she calms down. More than likely though she'll get even angrier. While you're holding her hands explain to her whats going on. "I know you're upset Abby about xyz, but you might hurt yourself by ..... " Explanations go a loooong way IMO, even when they are very little.

    4) With talking you can try to tell her you don't understand or act dumb LOL. If she points to a toy, ask her "Abby what do you want?" when she grunts respond with "Mummy doesn't understand, can you tell mummy what you want?" Then when you give it to her, say "you'd wanted the DOLL did you Abby? It's a pretty DOLL isn't it. The DOLL has a nice dress on doesn't she? Can you say DOLL Abby?" Emphasize the thing over & over when you give it to her, ask her to say. I think the big key is to talk constantly to them. The more you talk the more they learn.

    Well that's just some of the things we tried with Zander.

    HTH.

  3. #3

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    Alexa still doesnt hold a spoon & has only just started holding her own botle (she has always been FF too!!!!)..

    She sometimes hits.. when she does she gets a warning & a time out if she does it again.. just putting her in the hallway & closing the door seems to work...

    She also bangs her head on the floor for no reason whatso ever & if she hits her head on a door by accident she has to do it again on purpose & laugh!!!!!


    Alexa still does quite a bit of pointing but is slowly getting better with alot of tedious repitition on my part LOL... as Sarah said.... try acting dumb LOL..
    HTH

  4. #4
    bubbaangle Guest

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    hi emz, try not to worry too much. my baby hallie is 17 months now but she also did the smacking thing. she would smack her toys or someone who was standing near her if what she was doing wasnt working the way she wanted it to. she was around 14 months when she was doing that..she used to bang her forehead on the floor too.

    hallie can use a spoon now but i have to put the food on it then she does the rest.
    my mum says its all just different fazez they go through.
    when she starts a new thing or habbit i suppose you would call it, it usually only last a few weeks.
    i found it works when she is doing something like smacking to take her hand to stop her and then point at her and say no,no,no. this works for me.

    i have another baby keira she is 5 months so i will be going through all these things again very soon.
    hallie wasnt really a talker either, she used to do this very anoying wining and grunting noises when she wanted something. just give her time and you will see the changes in the next few months.
    hope this helps
    cera

  5. #5

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    Tallon can't/won't use a spoon. Isn't interested in it at all LOL. I wouldn't worry about that.. I'm sure they will learn it eventually

    Tallon's taken to headbutting me, and smacking my face during feeds. I just take his hand away and don't really say anything. I've found this works best with him, coz he does it for the attention. Just like he keeps going up to powerpoints and switching off the telly etc, I soon learnt to stop jumping up and stopping him.. coz that made him do it more! Now I just ask him to come and read his book, or go and get his tractor or something. Doesn't ALWAYS work, but usually it does. He stands there with his hand poised on the switch waiting for my reaction, and usually if he doesn't get the reaction, he leaves it alone. I'm finding the same works with him hitting or headbutting, and even when he bangs his head on the lounge or floor, it's all about attention with him.

    Talking - Tallon says hardly anything LOL. He babbles away in swahili or some such language! hehe. He has a few words, but we sign with him, so he can tell us what he wants that way.

  6. #6

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    Louis went through a stage of hitting! I was really worried but it all stopped again soon enough. We just told him that we don't hit and even did a bit of time out at the back door (for about 30 seconds) and then he'd say sorry. I would say it lasted about a month or two maximum and now it's very rare for him to hit!

  7. #7

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    Hi Emz.
    1) I wouldn't worry about it too much but, perhaps just give her a spoon every meal to hold onto & get used to, whilst you feed her with another spoon.
    2) My DD, Hailey, used to hit other kids. Conveniently she started doing this whilst we were at Tresillian for sleeping problems, and the carers just told me to not give it too much attention/fuss (same with the hurting themselves) as it can make them do it even more to get the attention. Advice they gave me was to remove the child from the situation and tell them a firm no (sitting at their level). She subsequently only did it for about 2 weeks.
    3) I've noticed Hailey does this more often when she gets really frustrated. She'll grab at her shirt and stretch it or bite her arm, or even smack the nearest thing to her. I think it's just a way of them venting frustration. I just try to explain why she's frustrated as much as possible and find this helps. They understand much more than we give them credit for. If she's just not listening, I just use the art of distraction, singing songs etc. Works every time
    4) I'm with Sarah-H, repeat the words in small phrases...they pick up words in their own time. I know a couple of bubs that stuck to grunting & pointing for a while, but you could tell they knew a lot and eventually they start using them. Read lots too. We probably read about 10 books to Hailey a night - she just loves them.

  8. #8

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    thanks for the replies and the suggestions everyone.

    I think we are making some progress on the hitting thing... when she hits ive been telling her to be gentle and showing her how to be gentle- it distracts her and she turns nice and now shes starting to come up and rub my face or leg or whatever just like i show her LOL for no reason- she wants the attention for being a gentle girl.

    As for the words.... she is such a little bugger. She CAN talk, shes just stubborn. Yesterday she learnt to say fish and fishie for goodness sake, "theres fish, theres fish"

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