i have the same views on the harnes aswell, i still do, but honestly it has saved part of my sanity, i was given a monkey one for dd1, (its like a tedy backpack, but a monkey and straps to there chest.) i have to use it on ds2 who will be 4 very soon, he calls it his monkey tail, and ocasionaly pretends he is a monkey. if i dont have it with us, he is a nightmare, running off touching things, tripping people trying to take off with items, you name it. he is no angel with the monkey but i know were he is, i can tell without looking if he is playing up (feel the pull on the strap)

maybe one of them might help?