DS decided he didn't want to sleep in his own cot from 6mths. We ended up at a sleep clinic where we did a version of controlled crying. DH ended up having to settle him. We put DS into the cot and say "sleep time, go to sleep" he'd cry and cry, but it was a case of listening to the crying and when he escalated then go into him and calm him down. Whenever he laid down it was a "Good boy" in a soothing voice. The first night was really bad but by the second night he was getting the hang of it. Now he will sleep in his cot, although he wakes often. I sleep on a mattress on the floor, so I can get to him before he wakes fully (otherwise it takes hours to resettle).

Your not a bad mum - you need a girl's night out (take yourself out to a movie) or go during the day, whatever time it works for your family.