Newborn - only sleeping on me...

[nataliew]

Hi Everyone,
I have an 11 day old boy and I am soooo confused about what I should be doing re: sleep time.
The only way I have been able to get him to sleep in his bed (a hammock) is to feed him until he falls asleep on the boob, let him sleep there for a while and then gently move him to the hammock - sometimes he'll stay down for a couple of hours but mostly he will wake after 5-10 minutes. I then start the routine over again (he is a big boy and feeds pretty much constantly). I am spending all day and night just trying to get him to settle and sleep.
Am I doing the wrong thing by leading him to sleep using a feed? (I've tried many times to put him down without and he cries immediately. No amount of rocking and sushing help)
Am I expecting too much of him at only 11 days? Should I just except that he needs to be asleep on me at the moment?
By the way, he loves the sling and sleeps really well in it but I had a c-section and it hurts too much to use it.
I feel like I'm not coping at all and that I'm doing everything wong by my little guy. I just need to get both of us some sleep!

[Arimeh]

Natalie - congrats on your bub.
I say do whatever seems to be working. In these early days, you wouldn't be establishing a precedent for future behaviour, so whatever works to get him to sleep I say do it!!!
I had a swing for my DS that worked a treat, would gently rock him to sleep. Or he just slept on my chest. He was pretty good though, I must say, usually fell asleep on the couch with me patting his back and if he would begin to wake up, I'd quickly go over there and shhh and pat until he fell back asleep.
The first few months are the hardest, but you are doing a fantastic job!!!! Keep up the good work.

[boomba]

Hi Natalie and congrats on your baby boy!

Sounds like your following your instincts quite well! I found the first 6 weeks so hard and tiring, but its over in a flash! DS is fed to sleep at night and sometimes during the day and he is so happy when he falls asleep I know it must be right
Its perfectly normal for your baby to want to be close to you, its his instinct as well!
You do what feels right for you and your baby cause everyone is different!
I have just finished reading Pinky Mckays sleeping like a baby and found it so very useful! I know its hard to find a spare moment to do anything in the first few weeks but its a great read!

Hope this helps a little good luck!

[Pretty Butterfly]

You are doing a fab job, and have already learnt what bubs wants... You and boobie!!! For these first few months, just go with the flow. Bub doesn't want to be seperated from his mummy, and if you can, just enjoy it!!! I loved my bubs asleep on me, and I rested too. You wont "spoil" him, he will learn mum is always there when he needs you, and he is too young to understand that he cant have you 24/7 just yet. He will need his own space in his own time...A loved, contended little boy will be happy and secure when its time to go down on his own. Leave the housework, and just play "mummy" for a while babe!!!!! Congtrats on a loving, cuddly little man!!!

[KatieRabbit]

Sounds like you are looking after your boy a treat- you are doing nothing wrong! Just feed him lots and cuddle him lots and forget the rest.
You don't have to be coping- I know the feeling but it is not an expectation that a mum with a new baby 'copes'. You probably don't feel in control and that is very normal and down the track will pass, but it is not a pleasant feeling. You are doing a great job. Keep coming back for support here when you need it.

[LuluHB]

I agree with what the others have all said. In those early weeks especially, do whatever works - no matter what the books say is the right or the wrong thing. My DD had pretty severe reflux and spent the first three months of her life sleeping on me. She now has two sleeps a day and sleeps 10 to 12 hours at night in her cot in her own room without the need to be cuddled to sleep.

Your bub is used to being incredibly close to you its pretty normal for him to want to be in constant contact with his mummy.

[nataliew]

Thank you all so much for the support and encouragement - I really, really need it.
All the books are telling me 'awake time for an hour, sleep time for 3 hours and start again' but my bubs just not fitting in with that schedule. Nor is he responding to rocking, sushing and then peacefully falling asleep in his bed. I just feel like crying 24/7.
What I need is to find somewhere he will go for even 15 minutes so that I can get a shower in/washing done etc.
This is all so different to how I thought it would be. I really need to get my head around it and start being positive. I know this is not forever but right now I just feel stuck and so overwhelmed.
Again, thank you so much for giving me some positive feedback.