Thank you all so much for the support and encouragement - I really, really need it.
All the books are telling me 'awake time for an hour, sleep time for 3 hours and start again' but my bubs just not fitting in with that schedule. Nor is he responding to rocking, sushing and then peacefully falling asleep in his bed. I just feel like crying 24/7.
What I need is to find somewhere he will go for even 15 minutes so that I can get a shower in/washing done etc.
This is all so different to how I thought it would be. I really need to get my head around it and start being positive. I know this is not forever but right now I just feel stuck and so overwhelmed.
Again, thank you so much for giving me some positive feedback.