Forshelby, from your first post you sounded like you were going through what my sister did with her first son. And then when you mentioned in response to others suggestions to look at his diet, that he;s been eating more ;junk', I though I'd put in my 2 cents worth based on my sister's experience. Her boy, now 15, reacts very badly with uncontrollable tantrums to food colourings. it took my sister about 10 years to figure it out, but now, it's a very clear link. That's not his only issue, to be fair, but it was a really big thing for him. SO I suggest you make junk food not available in your house, so that takes away the temptation for you, and offer him only foods that are good for him. I takes my nephew a couple of days to get it out of his system, but all kids are different. And for your DS, it might be sugar, or gluten, or... I don't know. Monitor what he eats and see what happens. Best of luck.
I told my sister a million times that she was a great mum, and that she wouldn't care that much unless she was a great, loving mum, but even a million times isn't enough to really believe it for yourself.
today is day 3 of offering only good foods. Today is the first day he's eaten anything ive offered except plain crackers. its hard because hunger makes him uncontrollable also. so far he's had rice bubbles, fruit puree and he played with some grapes. dinner will be baked potato... in the shape of chips
I've been strict. if he won't eat whats offered he gets nothing till the next meal except drinks or a piece of fruit if he'll accept that. so far he's just gone hungry.
we'll see what day 4 brings. There have been 2 major tantrums today. its a good day.
today is day 3 of offering only good foods. Today is the first day he's eaten anything ive offered except plain crackers. its hard because hunger makes him uncontrollable also. so far he's had rice bubbles, fruit puree and he played with some grapes. dinner will be baked potato... in the shape of chips
I've been strict. if he won't eat whats offered he gets nothing till the next meal except drinks or a piece of fruit if he'll accept that. so far he's just gone hungry.
we'll see what day 4 brings. There have been 2 major tantrums today. its a good day.
My daughter has speech delays that have come from a oral motor skills delay she couldn't chew or bite anything and would choke/gag constantly.
She has been referred to speech therapy.
Recently I made my own break through teaching her the word nooooooo or shake head and nodding head (not yes yet) but omg we can communicate!!
I let her "help" me do lots of things, unfolding my folding is annoying but she feels like she is helping putting things in and out of baskets, standing on a stool washing up plastic stuff or watching passing me pegs or taking them out and lining them up.
Give him more "responsibility"?
Fix the food thing, I think it's worth the effort, if the stuff is not in the house them you can show him "none left" and give him a banana. Find healthy things he wants to help you make or buy. My daughter loves rice snacks and cakes its her "bickie"
Good luck, my daughter is two next month and currently only has extreme meltdowns when hungry or over tired.
I can't imagine why anyone would think you're anything other than a mum doing her absolute best
I have one that came out screaming and who had been highly emotional ever since (and he is 3 months off turning 4).
as language has improved he has got a bit better but he still has tantrums, hits when frustrated etc.
if your gut tells you it's something outside the boundaries of 'normal' then I would seek help. my ds.recently had his 3.5 year old check up with the mchn and even though he passed the 'test' my mchn has given me a referral to a paed because I said I had some concerns. I figure the worst that will happen is that it is all normal but if it isn't, then I want to get help before my little guy is ready for school.
I also like janet lansbury's approach and even though it's tough to always remain as calm etc she suggests but the info on dealing with a child who hits/tantrums I have found really helpful.
Glad you found something that could help. Just a practical tip that works for us is naming emotions before they get out of control, so if I see that DS is starting to struggle then I'll say 'oh that looks frustrating, are you feeling frustrated?' and I"ll ask him to say frustrated back to me, so he has a name for how he feels. Sometimes I'll ask him to yell it or we'll both yell it to each other.
I think its great that you have figured it out! you didn't just label him a naughty kid- your gut said something is wrong and you investigated. I think that makes you an awesome mummy
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this sucks so much!
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