Toddler jealous of baby

[mountain mummy]

Oh MH, I wish I could remember the things I did with my kids as each new bub came along, but I'm so used to having my hands full, that I must be overlooking something!

I do remember getting DS1 a baby doll while I was pregnant with DD, so that he could get used to having a baby around .... teaching him to be gentle etc before she arrived (the doll ended up being bigger than DD ) So when I was feeding DD, DS1 was "feeding" his baby ... but he was a bit older than yours ....

He liked to cuddle up to me while I was feeding too ... actually, all three of the eldest have liked to cuddle or lay their heads on my lap while the baby has been feeding (successively of course! The eldest wouldn't do it now!)

All I can say is that it does get easier! I can now feed DS3 relatively drama free, but he is nearly 9 months. I think like some of the others have suggested, try to make a time that is "you and DS1" time, while the baby is sleeping. Yes the house may look like a bomb has hit it for a while (heck, mine still does! LOL) but IMO it's worth it for your eldest to realise that he hasn't been "replaced" so to speak ...

HTH xxx

[BekZ]

I had this when DD2 arrived. DD1 was horrid especially when I was feeding. Check out my gallery for an example of what she got up to!!!

I constantly talked to her and told her what I was doing with the baby. When bub needed a feed I told her that I was going to do so and I always gave her a big hugs and kiss before I started. DD1 was not interested in helping with the baby so I had to find out how to entertain her whilst I was tending to bub. I often feed bub and did activities with DD1 at the same time or I used the good old TV.

I also talked to DD1 about which behaviour that I did not like, some times I ignored her too. But when she was really good I went over the top with praise.

I never pushed the new baby onto DD1. If she wanted a cuddle then I let her but I never insisted.

I also tried to find one on one time with DD1 without bub around. I found bath time or bed time to be the best bet.

I also asked visitors to acknoweldge DD1 before the baby. This helped by making her feel important too.

I am heading down the same track again with DD3 due in 3 months and I am dreading this part of bringing home a new baby. DD2 is heaps more clingy to me than DD1 was/is.

Goodluck this is a hard time but it does get better.

[M22]

my ds will be 22 months when bubs is born- and this is my worst fear-

[shellbell3]

I get DD1 to be involved with things, getting nappies, rocking the bouncer.
When DD2 is asleep I'll play with her and always point out alot how DD2 can't do..... (whatever we're doing) cause she is too little and DD1 is a big girl.
When I'm feeding I'll chat to DD1 and ask her to get out something from her toy room to show me and we'll chat about it.
I must admit tho we have been quite lucky with DD1 behaviour she adores bubs and always wants to chat to her and show her things and wants to give her her dummy when she is crying.

[tellytubby]

Inertia -OMG!!! that would scare the living day lights out of me!!!

Glad i found this thread, DD will be 2 when this baby arrives. I hadn't even thought of the jealousy taht will occur until reading this.

[Mother Hubbard]

Thanks everybody for replying to my original post. You've all been a big help. I think I'm already seeing improvements in DS#1's behaviour. I'm feeling much better and confident about things now. Although I still wish my DH would hurry up and come home from work!