This is a hard one. If it were me in your situation, I would do what was necessary to make him feel loved and wanted, and to help him settle in. So if holding him for long periods of time is what it takes, then I'd do it.
If I was in your sister's position, well I don't know to be honest. Bub is still so very young, so still needs a lot of affection.
I think that under the circumstances, he is probably going to need those cuddles to help him adjust as well. I don't think that in a single day you changed their baby, but I think that he is probably just one of those babies that needs lots of cuddles kwim? I think that to help you through this time that you are going to have to do what makes things easier for you, and that may mean you spend a lot of time holding him. I posted in your other thread that you should get a carrier for him to make it easier for you to go about your day to day as well.
cuddle, cuddle, cuddle- the poor little man is going to be missing his mummy, and he's still so little. have you got a hug-a-bub or something to hold him in for a while?
hmm.. it is a tough one. As a parent I would want the carer to respect our wishes, for eg. with regard to crying it out.. as in... NOT allowed. So I guess if they express certain wishes, they should be respected.
But it's hard for me to agree with not cuddling a bub So I dunno. They obviously trust you to care for bub on such a fulltime basis... they must trust your instincts as well. I think as a parent I would appreciate that no one else would parent exactly the same as me anyway, so whilst I might have a gripe here and there about how they've done a few things, deep down it wouldn't worry me too much if I trusted them. Bub will be unsettled to some extent anyway if there is a bit of chopping and changing... and in my books, that needs lots of cuddles... maybe use that as your excuse hehe
I would go the cuddle option. They obviously trust you and your ability to care for your nephew....knowing what you are like. I would just do what comes naturally to you. However, if your sister asked you not to do it so much, then I'd respect that too.
I would give cuddles when ever he needs, as he probably feels "abandoned" by his mum and needs reasurance he is loved. So I say cuddle away till your heart desires.
I have to say I agree with general trend of this thread. Being that the baby is experiencing a different environment (as in at your place) he will need the cuddles to relax and come to some kind of terms with it, also when he goes back, the reason he he was probably so upset the first time was just having to re settle again in his home, not because you "spoiled "him or anything.
Hope it all works out, I think following your instincts cant be a bad thing.
Cuddles for sure. Being away from his mummy will be hard enough. I agree it is hard to strike a balance between their wishes and yours so I think you should let them know that's how you intend to care for him. If it is really against their wishes they may wish to find someone else to care for him.
So so hard, i hope your sister is ok and is up and about ASAP.
I completely understand bubs need cuddles and i agree at this young age they do need it but if possible i would try and find the middle ground, maybe cuddle to settle but then pop into bed and pat or something once asleep, or if need be cuddle as much as you like at the start but try and draw out the need towards the end.
MIL has always had a habit of not handing grandchildren over once asleep, she just holds them and holds them, after i had been in hospital for surgery it took me forever to get DD1 back to normal (i don't do controlled crying or anything but she WAS the kind of baby who would sook for say a min and then put herself off to sleep) and this didn't help my recovery at all.
GL, do what you feel is right i'm sure in the long run thats all your sister would want and thats why she is leaving bub with you.
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So I dunno. They obviously trust you to care for bub on such a fulltime basis... they must trust your instincts as well. I think as a parent I would appreciate that no one else would parent exactly the same as me anyway, so whilst I might have a gripe here and there about how they've done a few things, deep down it wouldn't worry me too much if I trusted them. Bub will be unsettled to some extent anyway if there is a bit of chopping and changing... and in my books, that needs lots of cuddles... maybe use that as your excuse hehe
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