Your poor friend. That's horrid.

Would a prefessional help? Would he be more likely to listen to them, than her? There are services who can pay your bills etc and put money in savings etc and give you pocket money. They take a percentage, but maybe that's better than the constant stress.

What about a reponsible adult he respects. I know my DH seems to notice when his own brother is being a cool Dad and seems to be a cooler Dad for a while too! It's not the same thing, but sometimes other people seem to be able to get through better than the 'other half'.

Goals? Do they have any? Or is it just too hard trying to get by? Maybe if he could save for a small goal - a thing he wants. Then a bigger thing, like a holiday etc. It's addictive, saving for treats.

Money can and will ruin relationships. It sounds like he doesn't respect her or the family unit very much, to put himself ahead of them.