It's not so much about retaliation for me. I don't say to myself DH has spent X amount on this, so I can then go and spend that amount on myself. I used to feel guilty buying books or clothes for myself and DH always commented that I was often buying new clothes. It was my mum who pointed out that DH spends money on his hobbies etc so why shouldn't I? And since I brought it up with him, he rarely comments on anything I buy now. We have a joint account that we use to pay bills, buy groceries etc. But we each have our own separate accounts and credit cards. Each payday, we put money in the joint account and the rest is up to us to spend. Now that we have DD most of my spending is on her rather than myself. But that's my choice. I should mention that any withdrawals from our mortgage redraw are discussed and agreed to first.
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