Mamaspice, i would love to see that spreadsheet.

i am so fed up with my child's father NOT co-operating about budgetting, that i see no way around it, except to for me to leave him. Our r'ship has been "dead" for years, but i have stayed due to no $$$$ to actually leave. THe fobbing off, the lying, the saying yes but no action to follow up the yes, all of that, has completely eroded my trust and respect in him (amongst other things too).

So, not being on the same page about money, i would say, has been a major contributor to our r;ship breakdown. He is an ostrich too, telling me "we don't earn enough to need a budget, that's for well off people who have money spare" - whereas i believe the less you earn, the MORE you need a budget, to make the little you have, go as far, and as effectively, as it can.

i am puzzled about people mentioning "moving interstate to save money" - does that mean some parts of Australia are cheaper (than others) to live in?

Each time i've thought about this, i come to the conclusion - look in the country for cheaper rents (but some country towns charge the same for rent, as what we're paying in a city) - so that isn't cut and dried for me (getting cheaper rent in country)
but the downside is more reliance on a working car, more petrol for basic services.
So i'm not entirely convinced moving to the country would make my dollars go further.

How do you find out even, where you COULD live that would be cheaper?

i get the feeling, you only find out by trying, and that could mean some costly time to find out. Not to mention, it would be so much harder to do with a child/ren (as opposed to doing that sort of thing when you were on your own, before children).

According to the "cities with the lowest cost of living" that i have seen published in newspapers in last decade, i already live in the cheapest city. i don't have a credit card, no cable tv, don't drink or smoke, don't go to the movies, don't go out to restaurants, shop opshop and sales for me and DD, no loans, my major expense is having a 2nd hand car and keeping it on the road/working.

i'm terrified about renting on my own (no rental refs) and coming up with the money to set up a new household for me and DD.

But it will be nice to be in control of my own destiny, after all the non-communication with child's father, his complete refusal to do a budget for the family. i went to charity places to get budgetting help. They all said to me, we can't help you do a family budget, if we only have half of the info, until you get info from child's father, the budget is not complete or workable.