I haven't read all the posts so sorry if I am just repeating. Rory I'm all for tailoring the approach according to the person. I don't really think there is a stock standard response to this... a lot depends on her personality. I generally reserve advice until I know someone enough to predict their reaction somewhat. I know how frustrating it can be when you have experience in an area of life and you see people who don't have much headed in a risky direction. It's your call ultimately (using your intuition) how far to go. I believe that sometimes things are best left alone despite the apparent risk because the person involved just isn't receptive and therefore will probably only learn through experience, as hard as that might be to watch. You can try changing tack... instead of persuing her you can play a bit of a mind game and boycott the whole topic for a while... don't talk about the whole subject at all... see if she creeps back with her feelers out. This often works, kinda reverse psychology. Don't know if you're up for that though LOL I know you are pretty straight down the line which is why i like you!

Is there any part of life that if you suggested to her that "ignorance is bliss" she would freak out? Would she feel the same way about eating something that might or might not harm her baby? "Oh we went out for lunch the other day and I ordered a salad... it was out on display at room temperature and could have been a risk for listeria... I don't know... oh well... ignorance is bliss"? If you wanted to push the issue you could use that example to prove that she does actually care about optimizing the chances of a safe and healthy birth for her baby But I suspect that's probably not the way to go if you want to preserve the friendship. In some ways people resent you more if you are right than if you didn't say anything at all.

Hmmm... follow you gut matey. Wish her well. She is responsible for herself and her baby. Maybe tell her to Google "BellyBelly"