This is a bit of a more emotional/scared type question i supose.
I have been thinking that i want to have an epidural, but, i cant help but feel that by me making that decision now, and not while in the throws of labour, that it makes me weak, and a failure.
Maybe its just my hormnoes talking, but, the more i think about it, the more i want to have one, but, the more i feel like i am letting down society as a general, by chickening out of going all natural.
Has anyone else had these feelings?
Sorry mum2bee...haven't had those feelings exactly....but I felt kinds the same when deciding whether to persevere with BF my DS or not. And I was stressing over what everyone else thought. My advice is do what YOU want, it's your body, your labour, your life. If you make a decision based on what society or other people think of you it's really only going to hurt you in the end.
For me.... I chose what was best for me, I was struggling with BF and was miserable so I bottlefed, and almost instantly everything else fell into place. It wasn't such a big deal in the end. Just follow your heart!
Persionaly i never go into labour wanting drugs but with DD i had gas and peth(didnt ask for that tho) and with DS i had the epi. I felt like a faluire too when i had the epi. but to be honest, i'm glad i did have it other wise i dont reckon i could have got him out because i was so tired from labouring without any drugs for nearly 2 days.
it's really up to you on what you decide but you shouldn't feel guilty for your choices and noone should have any decision on them either except you. as long as bub comes kicking and screaming into this world then you have done best job you could have done, no matter what choices you made.
Yeah I had similar feelings.
It's your birth and you should try not to worry to much about what everyone else thinks because everyone else isn't having your baby, you are
I tend to think it's a GOOD thing that your giving this some thought now. Too many people (and I was one) go into labour thinking they'll just wing it and see what happens at the time. I wish I'd thought more about this stuff BEFORE labour because my last birth in particular may have been very different.
You do what you feel you want to, this is your birth and no one should be making you feel a failure before it even happens
Don't worry sweetie. I was convinced I couldn't do it without an epi and I came out only using gas. Just go with whatever your gut tells you at the time, stressing out and worrying about it now is only going to make it harder for you once you're in labour.
I wanted to go all natural, begged for an epi (in transition, so far too late and entirely due to the adrenalin-kick-fear that transition brings, and i was at home so i couldn't have had one anyway) and ended up using gas for about an hour (when i should have been pushing - was in pre-labour still at first examination, crowning 4 hours later at 2nd, STILL not pushing LOL).
I also felt a failure for using the gas, especially afterwards when it became clear i was fighting the pushing reflex for nothing, and i could have gotten the natural birth i'd wanted, but i soon got over it - DD is here and safe and i have good memories of an empowering birth. All in all it was fine. If i have another one i'll know when i can push!
If i were you i'd stay flexible. It might all happen so easy you don't need an epi, or so fast you don't have time for one, or you might want one and get one and have your perfect birth. My friend had her DD with a "walking epi" so she could still move and push but not feel much or support her weight without help. SHe watched DD being born in a mirror as she pushed and she said that the epi helped her to really truly enjoy her birthing experience.
I think it's great to know what your "ideal" is before and then see what happens on the day, IYKWIM. Don't worry about what other people think. It's very easy to say "But do you really NEED an epidural?" when there's not a person coming out of your vagina!
I'm also thinking about epidurals more now that I'm being induced at 37 weeks due to medical conditions. Although I would have aimed to avoid it it's best to be informed. I found talking to a midwife at the hospital I will be delivering really helped. From what I can tell if you get one early and get top ups it may have worn off some by the pushing stage but I'd believe this to be a very fine line!
i had my pre admission interview today at the hospital (BTW, i was told last night at antenatel classes that the hospital that i am going to, their epidural rate is a whopping 97% !!!) and, the midwife asked me about pain relief, and i said that i think i wanted to go the epidural. She advised me to wait and see how i go, and try other methods and just air/gas and i might be just fine without it. I was surprised considering their epidural rate. So, that made me feel better. I really felt that i would get pushed into it abit.
All the best in whatever you decide to do...trust yourself! You know you better than anyone does...
You're at Mercy, right? Me too...I never realised that their epidural rate was so high...glad that you didn't feel pressured at your pre admission interview...
Last edited by monnie; April 26th, 2007 at 11:38 PM.
Monnie - yep, Mercy and the midwife was great actually - felt very comfortable. The physio and antenatel classes where also really good. Recommened them. They get the point across in a light hearted manner, which i think keeps the blokes amused and interested, at the same time as telling the women exact what they need to know.
Im a bit different with the pain relief. I had no plan and now that Im pregnant with my second child, I relise how much I just didnt know. I woke up at about 3am 2 weeks before I was due with pain every 5 mins and a bit of a show. I called the hospital and was ordering the epidural then. The midwife said of course no u cant do that. I was scheduled to have a c-section 2 days later due to a serious health condition. Midwife wasnt worried though cos it usually take ages. By the time we got to the hospital a whole 45min later however contractions were 2 mins apart and I was screaming for pain relief. I think I had it in my head that I shouldnt have to go through all this pain if im having an c-section. And to tell u the truth I still feel that way now. She made me go through labour for a further hour and a half with out any pain relief. Something tells me I just had the wrong midwife.
I figure if they have invented these things to help u through labour, why should u feel guilty for useing them. Im all for pain relief and if u decide to go for the epidural, it is the most fantastic thing in the world and u will probably want to have the doctors love child that gave it to u.
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Deciding to have epidural
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