Stupidly, I had DH.

Next time (if there is one) I'm having my sister. And no DH if I can manage it.

You need someone who loves you, cares for you, listens to you and will stick up for you if someone wants to shove "hospital policy" on you. Or tell you that you're in pain when you're not.

DH believed the midwives when they said I was in pain rather than me, who was not only not in pain but chatting about the student midwife's studies and playing scrabble. My mother would be too flappy and fussy. My sister may not have given birth, but she's reliable and calm and wouldn't flap too much. She loves me enough to be there for me but isn't so crazy-love that she'd tell me to go against my needs because she thinks I may want to.

I also had a whole plethora of hospital staff the first time - can't even remember who they all were or what they were for. Next time, I may have a midwife IF that midwife is VERY, VERY lucky. I know the last two midwives I saw recently tried to talk me out of freebirthing but TBH if I don't feel comfortable with a midwife I'm not going to have one.