i had the unsupportive mother with my birth with DS - she told me that me wanting and active birth was the same as digging a hole and squatting. she said the same thing a few times and i cracked it with her and a few other females in my family and said to them
"are you the one birthing or am i? I AM thats right, im pushing a human out of my Vagina not you. sure, you've done it before but this is my body and my birth, now shut up and support me or dont say a damned thing to me about it ok?" (i got cringes for useing the word Vagina too )
...i got the support i needed from there on in becuase they had children at a time where DH's werent welcome in the birthing room! as for you DH, tell him that you need his undying support, which means that no matter what he thinks he has to support you in what you want to *try* - you may need drugs, but you want to go hammer and tong with out them he should be supportive! an induction Vs. natural labour = very differant pain (from talking to other mums). plus i know for my DH him seeing me in 'pain' freaked him out - have you talked to your DH about the last labour and any thing that he may still be feeling uneasy about/ freaked out by? because i know my DH felt powerless to help me...but after making him talk about it for a few months he came to accept that my body was doing as it should have been and the 'pain' was a productive one. maybe say that to your DH that the pain you feel in labour is a productive one - not a broken bone kind of pain KWIM?

as for your mum - well tell her thats nice that she thinks you cant do it. sure thats how it turned out with your DD, but this is another baby so it'll be different again...unless she'd like to take all the drugs for you so both her and you DH can feel better about drugs being used in labour - they never said labouring women needed them