MBear thanks to you I burnt my boobies by choking on tea! Maybe it's a good line to tell a woman in labour : "Look lovey it's Brad Pitt"... Sorry it tickled my funny bone.

Bek it's great that you are asking - there is a lot said about tearing and prevention - I don't see it as a preventable thing - yes manageable but not always preventable.

If you have a fast labour it can mean you will tear or it can mean you won't. In my personal experience my labour with a 3hr + second stage tore 2nd degree. My daughter at nearly 10lb born in an hour of labour give or take I had a teeny graze.

Utilising water minimises trauma to the perineum so if you can use a bath or tub that's great. Prone position statistically causes the most likely chance of tearing. So get up, move, squat to help that peri stretch. There are schools of thought about using perineal stretching - some say it works some say it makes no difference. I say, it can't hurt. Olive oil is fine - sweet almond oil is another of my favorites. Using fingers to gently stretch until you get that burning feeling is a good way of getting to know your body - and if it helps to prevent trauma that's great.

To be honest once a Woman gets to the point where that head is crowning it is my personal opinion that she follow those instincts. I cannot hold back myself & just go with my body. That may be an option for you. I don't believe in too much coaching in labour. Going with your body and it's rythums usually is a positive thing. Tearing is not the end of the world - yes it hurts and obviously it's better not to - but if you do there is much that can be done to help you heal. I add the caveat that obviously if a baby's position is such that clearly damage is going to be done to the mother this is a different kettle of fish. My comments pertain to birthing a baby in a position that is not going to cause obvious and great trauma...

There is also a school of thought that believes a tear is (usually see above!) better than an episiotomy - I am of that school!

Bek you are going to birth this baby girl beautifully - all my love darling...