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Thread: Who are you having in the delivery room?

  1. #37

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    I don't think your selfish either. I had my husband & my sister and I'm so pleased it turned out to be the perfect balance that I was hoping for. My DH was the silent encourager & supporter with his gentle touch. My sister was more vocal and provided the encouragement for me when I needed energy.

    My mother created no end of problems as she felt she had the right to be in there even though she was told otherwise. We still haven't forgiven each other (she's angry because I wouldn't let her be there - in her mind there was something wrong with me because I didn't want her there. Meanwhile I haven't forgiven her for ignoring my wishes and standing outside the delivery room and calling out things to me.) Trust me, don't give into something that is not comfortable for you - your birthing experience could be severely effected. Ask my husband, my BP rose by 10 whenever my Mum said something to me - seriously.



    At the end of the day hon, this is NOT about them as much as they might like to think it is. This birth is the arrival of you & your DH's child and what you both want & feel comfortable should be the end of the story.
    Last edited by Beckibee; February 20th, 2007 at 09:00 AM.

  2. #38

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    My MIL was with us during birth to be with Paris so that if she did get distressed or bored MIL could take her out or go for a walk. I also wanted my MIL to share the experience with me as it meant alot for her to be there.

    I love the fact that I can look back and know that the room was filled with people who loved each other and who were waiting patiently to meet my son. It definitely added to the atmosphere IMO.

    Give me a village birthing experience any day!

    *hugs*
    Cailin

  3. #39
    Percy Guest

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    I only had my husband and my midwife in the room with me the whole time (admittly my active labour was only an hour and half) and I wouldn't have it any other way. It was such a peaceful natural experience that even one more person in the room probably would've ruined. I didn't even see any other medical personnel the whole time I was in the hospital! (I transferred to a post natal facility four hours after the birth.)

  4. #40

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    I don't think I'm bothered by the idea of a village birthing experience (love it Cai, thanks!) but all the same DH and I have decided that we want just us there (apart from the medical staff of course).

    The only other people I would consider having would be my mum, because I always want her when I'm sick or in pain, and a friend, who is not my BF by any means but is wonderful and has delivered three children naturally, so I think she would be a good support person. But it's not going to happen this birth!

    I once asked my mum hypothetically if she would be at our birth if we asked her..........she wasn't too sure if she could handle seeing me in that much pain, and didn't seem keen on the idea. Now that we're pg, she has said that if I really want her there DH just has to call, but she certainly doesn't expect to be involved.

    I'm toying with the idea of not letting anyone know that we are going to hossy. I don't want anyone hanging around the hospital, and I don't want anyone sitting at home and worrying cos they haven't heard back from us IYKWIM? I'm not telling anyone that's the plan though, they'll just get the phone call to say that bubs is here, I don't think they'll be complaining then

  5. #41

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    yup must say I am really not all that fussed about who is there aslong as they were supportive and loving, so I would do a village birth to hehehehe, having sad that with my first I did not want many people there I was so worried about my mum looking at me 'down there' LOL but by the end I was like yeah come on in the more the merrier as I really just could not have cared less, I still think its a personel choice of course and it has got to be something you are comfortable with.

    ETA Naomi54 I just read your posts, I think you have made the right decission, I think you will need your mum there and she will also help to support Rick and I know my mum would not expect to be there in the room with you or at all, its lovely that you have thought of her but please dont feel any guilt as I know she wont be offended or upset, I lnow she will want to rush down there and meet her new grandson asap as she will be so overjoyed and excited, but yeah having your mum is very important as I know you are feeling nervous and she will help you with that and well she has done it 4 times now so she knows what she's doing and her births were not all 20 plus years ago so I am posative she will be a wonderful support for you.
    Last edited by *Elle*; February 20th, 2007 at 10:18 AM. Reason: adding content

  6. #42

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    lol Naomi I know how you feel a few ppl I haven't liked that have come near me he's fluffed up and turned into a bit of a feral cat, he always sleeps hugging me and lately has been very overly protective of my stomach and lays across it which isn't very comfortable lol.

    If worse comes to worse I would tell everyone that you don't know what you want and want to start with having everyone outside and will ask for ppl if you want them there, if they get offended then tough. I know i will probably want my mum there but dad would automatically follow in tow and I wouldnt be impressed with that, it's your time, your moment, YOU decide :-)

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