Aww Daniela, you poor chook

I know how you feel, it's like you have to grieve for what could have been & that's ok IMO. It's tough to be happy over something so huge that you just weren't expecting. I am thankful, absolutely, that Alexzander and myself came out the other end intact, but that doesn't mean I'm not still disappointed by the way things turned out.

You need to keep pouring out your feelings and one day you'll feel better about it. I had to talk about it A LOT before I came to the realisation that there was nothing I could do to change the way things happened with my labour & subsequent emergency c/s. So talk it through with friends, with your hubby, with us on here, I promise you it helps.

As for the pains, they will start to fade away soon & you'll forget just how sore you once were. Try not to overdo things until you feel fully recovered from the surgery. As you said, it is major surgery and you are still healing.