Gen Y Embarrased to Breastfeed

[Inanna]

MMM not so sure about the authenticity of this article. Sunshine Sieben I agree with so much of what you say. I have breastfed 5 babies, co fed, toddler/preschooler fed... Like SS there was never a "choice" to breastfeed it was just what I did. There was no other way for me. Though it was dang dang dang hard in the beginning with 2 of my babies & of course expressing for months after Immy was born without even putting her to the boobie!

I too think breast feeding shouldn't be hidden (for me),.. I took the opportunity to show just how normal and every day breastfeeding is. SS you are so correct - Aussies have a warped view of breastfeeding (generally societally I am referring to)... Breasts are seen as sexual organs - and they can be but they are there to comfort and nourish my baby & they got a great work out there...

I say bring it out of the closet - make it as natural and "normal" as it surely is... Don't hide it away as it is beautiful! Be proud of providing this for your baby!

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I dunno Mayaness - I breastfeed discretely. But then I walk discretely, shop discretely, eat discretely... I just do it, without drawing attention to the fact I'm doing it. That makes it discrete. Breastfeeding just happened and I didn't make a song and dance out of it.

I do agree with many others that some of those awful breastfeeding covers look awful, make breastfeeding a "looky here!" objective and take longer to get going when your baby is hungry. Never liked them, never used them. Loose cardigans were good enough for me in the "oooh, what's going on there then?" days. But mostly because my breastmilk could squirt for yards when that happened, and I didn't want people getting that in their eyes!

And my breasts fed my baby. They're also sexual. But then my knees are sexual too, as is my neck and wrists and hips and back and brain and... pretty much the whole body. People don't object to seeing my neck in public so why object to anything else? It's just a body part!

[Smoke Jaguar]

LZ - here in Oz, when told it's ok if it's discreet, 'discreet' means to make sure you're as unnoticeable as possible, not 'just doing something'. 'Discreet' to me means you're making an effort to be unnoticed, instead of just doing it regardless. I breastfeed when I'm out of the home and make effort to neither be noticeable or unnoticeable. I don't think I'd be called a 'discreet' breastfeeder here! Sheesh, I breastfed last night at my fire brigade meeting while DD was in the Ergo - I prefer to feed in the Ergo than to get her out of my other slings because it means she gets the breast that much sooner and she can fall asleep again without being lifted back into a sling, I don't choose it to be 'discreet'. I happened to arrive late to the meeting and sat at the front, along the side, so everyone knew what I was preparing to do and actually doing! I guess that wasn't very discreet

[spenceee]

Thanks for the big response,

For some I think the topic has derailed, if you got on with BF whenever wherever and didnt care who stared then Kudos but I didnt start this for you. Telling someone who may be embarrased about getting their boobs out in public that you had no issues is not really helping.

For those who wish to discuss the nature of BF in public and whether or not it should be discreet, overt or inconsequential then maybe another thread should start.

All those who have posted handy hints on maintaining modesty while letting nature do it's thing Big Thanks!!!!

[Jennifer13]

Thanks for the big response,

For some I think the topic has derailed, if you got on with BF whenever wherever and didnt care who stared then Kudos but I didnt start this for you. Telling someone who may be embarrased about getting their boobs out in public that you had no issues is not really helping.

For those who wish to discuss the nature of BF in public and whether or not it should be discreet, overt or inconsequential then maybe another thread should start.

All those who have posted handy hints on maintaining modesty while letting nature do it's thing Big Thanks!!!!

Spencee, many, many threads on BellyBelly go off on tangents once the discussion has matured. This is a good thing, as long as no one is going against our guidelines, and not something to be criticised.

A wholesome discussion does not need to stick to the one original post to have a point in something that relates to a broader social issue.

I hope you got something out of those posts that you felt answered your original queries, but please stay away from having a go at members who've taken your post and other points further.

[Bathsheba]

Haven't read the thread but I have a Gen Y DD (I think) born 1994. And she has watched me BF her 2 younger brothers until only a year ago... ie my youngest was 2yo when we weaned as per the World Health Organisation guidelines. So I'm hoping that I have helped create a comfort zone for her. We are both quite modest females. I BF everywhere... on public transport, banks, cafes you name it... and felt MUCH less embarrassed doing that than having everyone look at me because I had a screaming hungry baby. I had one woman tell me off for having a crying baby on the train but never did anyone tell me off for BFing on it. My 15yo DD witnessed that... I suspect it might influence her somewhat

[SammyRo]

Spencee - I think that by people saying I managed it, is just another way of normalising it, and by normalising it, then hopefully less people will be embarrased by the notion of it.

When I was pg with DD, my SIL, at the time was 13, and she asked about whether I would bf, and even do it in public - we were the first in our family to have children, and so she had never really seen it in progress. TBH, she was a little uncomfortable the first couple of times I got my boobs out and you could see she was trying not to look. But, I think by the time DD was 3months old, she would regularly come sit next to me and chat, and even at times, would stroke DD's head whislt she was bfing - to the SIL, by me bfing wherever and whenever, and not being discreet about it, it normalised the behaviour so that it wasn't weird or embarrasing to her, and I hope that when it comes time for her to have children, she won't think twice about bfing.

As for practical advice, when we were just establishing bf'ing, I found parents rooms really helpful. The first time I did in public at a cafe, I tried using a wrap to cover me up, but found that in attaching DD, and trying to ensure I was covered, I probably exposed even more of myself so quickly gave that idea up! As many have said, when a baby is on the boob, you really don't see much at all. I have bought a couple of cheap singlets to wear under normal tops, so that my belly is still covered - but that's nothing to do with wanting to cover my boobies up - its wanting to cover my jelly belly!

[Inanna]

I think any hesitancy to BF in public says more about our culture viewing women as being sexual creatures who are there for the viewing pleasure of men than anything else. Why else is it ok to "flash the snatch" in a miniskirt but BF in public is seen as on the nose?

Excellent quote Rory!!!

Spencee I think when you post an article such as you have it will give you lots of differing views and opinions. That's the way conversation works...

I feel fairly sure that your wife after breastfeeding for a while will be less inhibited. As women in this country as Rory says larely our bodies are seen as sexual first and foremost. When a woman (& the men around her) begin to see a woman's body as a nurturing organ - when a woman learns the magic of the comfort and nutrition her breasts give to her baby - the whole boob thing really gets a back seat!