Would you use someone else's EBM??

[Phteven]

MR, yes, we don't know everything about formula, but we do know there's no nuts or caffeine in it. Which I wouldn't want to assume about EBM.

You can't really be sure about that. There's no guidelines in place that say that it can't be processed on equipment that processes nuts or instant coffee so it's entirely possible that formula could have both of those things.
If half the 'goodness' is destroyed by pasteurisation then that's probably still go 80% more 'goodness' than formula (that is only my guesstimate )

[Heaven]

Oh I didn't know that about the pasturisation, that's good then! Still a lot of goodness in there. And they mix EBM from a lot of different people so I suppose the babies would be getting a lot of different good antibodies for their immune system too.

[Janie]

This is such an interesting debate ! I would have no hesitation in giving my baby BM from a known donor, or from a milk bank. It certainly would be preferable to me than using formula. I would feel comfortable feeding someone else's baby, and would be okay with my baby being BF by someone else, under emergency circumstances. It's not something I look at casually, but if needs be, I would be okay with it, and likely be very grateful.

I know that everyone is expressing (no pun intended ) their own opinion here, which is great, I don't mean to dispute that. I find it very interesting that mums feel strange about giving a healthy or term baby a 'bodily fluid', yet it's okay for premmies or sick babies? Surely they (although in great need of BM) would be more susceptible to anything 'weird' happening with the BM? I know it's an emotive topic, and we don't always use logic where emotion is concerned, but it seems an interesting way of looking at the issue to me. ALL babies can benefit from having BM, it can prevent illness (and of other things) in children that start off in good health! So I'm just interested in what leads you to that conclusion? I'm not trying to be argumentative at all, and I totally respect a parent's choice to feed their child how they wish, I am just really curious as to how people come to these decisions.

I know that having had a prem, and a baby that needed comp feeds, I would be eternally grateful to anyone who could donate my baby their BM. Maybe that has influenced my thinking? Maybe it's that he now has known intolerances that were surely exacerbated by him being given cows milk formula from a very young age. And certainly learning more and more each day about breastmilk and formula has influenced me. I'm sure my answer today is different to the one I would have given three years ago, even one year ago.

So yeah, what is it exactly that leads you to making this decision? Do you think that you would change your mind if your back was to the wall, so to speak?

[Smoke Jaguar]

Always flabbergasted by the 'someone else's bodily fluids' statement - we take other people's blood when we need it, and BM is a product of the circulatory system! It's not exactly a waste product, or saliva donation! Wow, it gets me every time!
I've donated my milk to a local mummy who had a 2 week old baby and a bad thrush situation. She tapped into her local network asking for people to donate, which they did, and that baby put on the weight and condition she needed (and then some) while her mummy expressed to get her supply up and heal her nipples, with no need for any supplementation of an articial nature. She wasn't some dumb hick who didn't know better, she's an astrophycisist (as I later found out when she interviewed for an article the Herald Sun on homebirthing!), white middle-class woman (they kind who usually has more 'ick-factor' attitudes). I wasn't screened or anything, just thanked.
If you do have an excess, and if you are already in a network like the ABA or a homebirth support group, put the word out about your stocks - they may just come in handy by a savvy mummy who runs into trouble with her baby
FWIW, I had oversupply with DS, but if something happens to affect supply or feeding with this one, I wouldn't hesitate to take someone else's EBM. Obviously

[Heaven]

Oh I just had an interesting thought from something someone else said.
What if you weren't able to breastfeed atm and with all this swine flu stuff going around, would you take someone else's EBM to help protect your baby. In particular, what if a friend actually got swine flu and said you could use their EBM would you? Because presumably it would have antibodies in it to fight against swine flu wouldn't it?? Interesting thought... If any of us here get swine flu I hope it's me that gets it first so DD will get some antibodies before she is exposed to it.

[Maruschke]

It is a toss up between the unknown of formula, and the unknown of someone else's EBM. I still feel funny about the 'body fluid' thing. I know that blood is screened really well before it is used. But then again, formula seems so empty to me.

I wonder what they did back in the time of wet nurses? Did they purposefully expose the wetnurses to different flus so that that baby would get the maximum exposure to antibodies? Did they screen wet nurses? Hmmm....

ETA - we ff . Even if I did use someone else's EBM, I could never let anyone else bf my baby. There is some kind of bonding that occurs with bf, and that is for me and DD1 only.

[briggsy's girl]

a while ago i would have sat on the fence with this one - very much "never been there, don't know how i'd react" - but after being kept in hospital longer than necessary as my milk took too long to come in, and having EVERYONE throw around the idea of formula just to get Emerald's weight up before she could leave, i think i'm looking at it very differently now. i didn't want to give her formula at all - and would have gratefully accepted EBM from another person in those couple of days just until my milk came in. i don't think i'd have been able to let her feed from someone else - i needed her on my boob to get my milk stimulated - but to top her up and help her gain weight - hell yeah!

i'm now in a situation where i seem to have too much milk - but she's less than a fortnight old so there is no supply/demand thing happening just yet - it feels like such a waste letting it all run down the drain in the shower - and if i could offer to express milk to help another bubba in need i'd do it in a heartbeat - unfortunately i don't think there is a breast milk bank out here so it would have to be a known donation and i don't know anyone that needs milk at this point...

in acceptin milk from someone, all i'd ask is that they are a non-smoker and were able to say what they've eaten/drunk in the last few days so that i could see if it's stuff that i eat/drink - and i'd do the same if i was donating - i guess mainly due to the change of taste - i wouldn't want to do anything to harm a bub by having something in the milk that their parent doesn't eat and may cause a sensitivity...

if i were in a situation such as Deb outlined with hospital etc, i'd appreciate someone making sure Emerald didn't have formula - and i'd help out a friend in the same situation if i could

[Liz]

I wonder what they did back in the time of wet nurses? Did they purposefully expose the wetnurses to different flus so that that baby would get the maximum exposure to antibodies?

Why on earth would anyone do that?? We don't deliberately expose ourselves as mothers to flus & diseases just to pass on antibodies.. why would a wetnurse?

If a friend of mine was lactating.. you would assume this is because she is feeding her own baby.. most mums do their best for their babies.. so why would that mother's milk be any worse than mine? Yes, rule out harmful diseases and obvious things like smoking etc, but gosh.. it's all milk for human consumption.

[Phteven]

I find it very interesting that mums feel strange about giving a healthy or term baby a 'bodily fluid', yet it's okay for premmies or sick babies? Surely they (although in great need of BM) would be more susceptible to anything 'weird' happening with the BM? I know it's an emotive topic, and we don't always use logic where emotion is concerned, but it seems an interesting way of looking at the issue to me. ALL babies can benefit from having BM, it can prevent illness (and of other things) in children that start off in good health! So I'm just interested in what leads you to that conclusion? I'm not trying to be argumentative at all, and I totally respect a parent's choice to feed their child how they wish, I am just really curious as to how people come to these decisions.

Janie, in my case it's not the ick factor, it's the supply issue that would make me hesitate to give donated EBM to my healthy baby. Donated EBM is a fairly limited resource so IMO it is best going to those who need it most - the sick and the premature. If it was in abundant supply then I'd be totally in favour of giving it to all babies who didn't have access to fully functional boobs.

[briggsy's girl]

Janie, in my case it's not the ick factor, it's the supply issue that would make me hesitate to give donated EBM to my healthy baby. Donated EBM is a fairly limited resource so IMO it is best going to those who need it most - the sick and the premature. If it was in abundant supply then I'd be totally in favour of giving it to all babies who didn't have access to fully functional boobs.

supply was something that worried me when they mentioned using formula or ebm for Emerald - i was basically feeding every 3 hours and expressing in between - i wanted to make sure that my breasts were given as much stimulation to bring the milk in as possible!

i agree that if EBM were in abundant supply then feeding it to term bubbas with supply issues would be worthwhile - but i think there is more of a need for the EBM for premmies or unwell babies at this stage. for those in a situation like mine where it was a simple case of milk coming in later than anticipated, the stimulation of attempting to feed my baby was a neccessity to help it along - any EBM available woudl have just helped her to not lose so much weight (and get everyone off my case about supply and failure to thrive and needing to see paeds blah blah blah!)

[~ Mylitta ~]

I've just signed up to be a donor at the new Mercy Breastmilk Bank here in Melbourne They are going to start taking donations in the next couple of weeks when they are up and running. The lady on the phone said they might not need me in the first few weeks though because they want to put a priority on donors that have premie babies or very very newborns because the type of milk they need most is for the SCN babies. I didn't even give any thought to the fact that milk changes according to the age of your baby until she mentioned that. She was really nice though and very appreciative of me registering. I'm actually looking forward to starting to donate, assuming my milk supply stays as large as it is at the moment...

[butterfly_warrior]

When Sam was born premature and had blood sugar issues and couldn't suck... If someone else's EBM had been on offer I would have accepted in a heartbeat.

As someone with no supply at all, I would have accepted donated EBM with no hesitation at all (assuming non-smoker, etc).

There were no networks for me to tap into at the time. I still wonder whether the NGT and formula was the better option over the glucose drip when Sam was born.

However, would it have been possible to have EBM donated for such a long time period as we would have required? I don't think so. It wasn't just a short-term problem we were facing.

BW

[Heaven]

Oh yeah interesting Krystie. The milk I have stored is mostly from when DD was 3 wks old.

[Liz]

I've just signed up to be a donor at the new Mercy Breastmilk Bank here in Melbourne They are going to start taking donations in the next couple of weeks when they are up and running. The lady on the phone said they might not need me in the first few weeks though because they want to put a priority on donors that have premie babies or very very newborns because the type of milk they need most is for the SCN babies. I didn't even give any thought to the fact that milk changes according to the age of your baby until she mentioned that. She was really nice though and very appreciative of me registering. I'm actually looking forward to starting to donate, assuming my milk supply stays as large as it is at the moment...

I dumped soooooooo much milk at the hospital (I'm talking a good 2L of milk!).. and it was prem milk too The fridge broke and everyone's milk defrosted. We kept a days worth and dumped the rest If only I could have walked it over to the NICU that same day to be used

[Bathsheba]

Some great posts here no use repeating others to say that yes! I would use donated EBM without hesitation... when I had BFing problems and had to resort to using artifical milk briefly that worried me more than using EBM ever would... especially with the Melamine contamination scare... I just don't trust the artifical product as much as I would trust a screening process in a milk bank.

[ezymay]

Yes I agree when you think we regularly drink the bodily fluid of a cow... that is gross but we give that to our kids (well no quite yet in our case but in a few months)

I just re read what I wrote and it might sound as if I think of BM as "another bodily fluid" but I don't at all! Otherwise I would feel very strange about having so much of it in my fridge and freezer for the last 9 months of exclusive expressing! But just that if it is thought of that way then cow's milk needs to be thought of as a bodily fluid too.

[Bathsheba]

Defintely... if it's gross drinking a human's bodily fluid then why not a cow's bodily fluid? And when you think about it would you get down and hook your baby up to a cows udder to suck? No? Funny how we get used to things and lose sight of the reality.

[Lolli]

What a good thread. This is very interesting.

I'd be more than happy to use other people's ebm, especially from a family member, friend or milk bank but not limited to those. it seesm like I'd have an even easier time than most of you because I wouldn't mind taking milk from someone who smoked. I smoked most of the time I was feeding ds (bar the first two weeks). So as long as I knew they had a comparative habit to mine- less than 10 a day- and waited at least an hour after smoking before expressing, it wouldn't bother me. As others have pointed out, comparative lifestyle factors would be the key. Breastmilk is still better than formula, smoker or not (in my eyes, anyway).

I'd be quite happy to feed someone else's baby, or to have someone else feed mine. I would be happy to donate ebm (except, of course, I smoked, so i couldn't). A freind who had a her premmie baby 20 years ago says she quite often was aked to share her ebm with other babies in the hospital. i think it's kind of sad we've lost that 'village' approach to it.