Hoody, big hugs to you hun and your little one, I hope you work it all out soon. Your Bub will be fine, sounds like Barb was great help to you. You are not failing her at all, you sound like a fantastic Mummy! I am FF Madeleine since 2 weeks old. I have never felt like I've failed her and neither should you. FF Madeleine has been great but if BF is your strong choice then stick with it and good luck with everything