This feels like an endless saga to me sorry if I seem to be whining all the time mayby more of a vent

I went on the aba website and was looking at joining and doing a class later in pg but I just can't bring myself to do it I still hurt from not being able to bf ds I'm not sure I want to got to s class and be shown how to bf and listen to stuff about bf when it hurts to think about it
I feel silly like it shouldn't be this much if an issue