Prama, its a bl00dy tough road to travel when we start BF and I've always said that BFing 'is natural but it certainly doesn't always come naturally'. It's a learned experience for both of you and I'm thinking that him bieng a bit early has thrown you all out of whack and you mentally weren't prepared for it to happen when it did kwim? Your baby, even though is nearly 2wks old is still learning about this bad old world and everything is new to him and on top of all that he's probably like 'what? you put me in this strange new place and on top of that you want me to feed like I've done it before?" With the expressing, sometimes the pump just isn't as efficient as a baby suckling and you will get less with a pump than you will a baby.

At the end of the day though it all comes down to how much you want it to happen. I think my first BF experience could have been a whole lot differnt if I wasn't given a bum steer my a midwife who told me 'if it's not hurting he's not on properly' and literally tore him off my breast when I said it didn't hurt this time and because of that terible advice we went on to have attachment issues that never resolved. But i'm not a person who lives with regret, so yes, while I wish things had worked out differently, it doesn't bother me now.

And the other thing is, happy baby doesn't always equal happy mum. I think some women are consoled into happiness by seeing that their baby is happy.

Good luck Prama, and know that if you decide to change your mind and try full time BF again, you will get plenty of support here.