I didn't have a forceps etc delivery but I did have a 3rd degree tear from birthing my DD. Just like you I had Dr's "strongly" suggesting I have a c/s for the birth of my DS 3.5yrs after the birth of DD. They said because DD was considered to be on the larger side when born & subsequent babies tend to get larger & being a boy they are generally bigger then I apparently had a big chance of tearing again.It made me so scared thinking that if a Dr thought I needed a c/s to avoid having the incontinence etc as a result of another tear then maybe it would be best that I go ahead with the unwanted c/s.
I decided to go ahead with another vaginal birth & only had a tiny tear, hardly even noticable.
I suggest you get a second opinion.
One thing that I made sure I asked my midwife to help me with before the strong labour started was to help me breath through the pushing part as I just pushed DD out without letting "down there" stretch so to speak which is why I tore. She helped me breath & it was so hard to breath through contractions when your body is telling you to push but I'm so glad I did, I'm sure that is why I hardly tore at all.
Thats just my experience but I think its worth asking your midwife to help you in that stage of giving birth.

Wishing you luck with which ever birth you choose