CS under GA disappointment thread

[Nadine216]

Ticklish - It's going very good this time, thank you. Just had my bp and urine tested today and all is normal (120/85: clean urine) So I'm just as positive as my ob that I'll go the distance with this one.

I really can't explain to you how I made peace with my situation. And it's nothing like your c/s, and I'm not you, don't have your emotions or mindset... kwim?? Bellybelly had a lot to do with me accepting. Reading other women's stories and thinking "OMG it could have been worse" Then also I focused on not so much the birth, but the actually fact that even though my placenta was also buggerd up (dd was growth retarded and weight 1.4kg at birth - I was 33 weeks, she was something like 30 weeks) I actually brought life into this world. I know, I know .... I also hate it when ppl tell me that I should consentrate that my baby is healthy, so a VB does not matter, BUT in a way ... I constentrated on the fact that life was created in me, life that is currently waking me up in the morning going "Mommy get UP!!", a second life created in me that is currently kicking my ribs to shreads, and THAT (in my state of mind) was/is/will be more important than a c/s or a VB ... FOR ME.

I focused my energy not on how angry/dissapointed I was, but on the positive side of things. I did not leave my husband and newborn alone in the world, I could breastfeed for 3 months (goal is 6 this time around), I could care for her and give her the love and attention she deserve ... I later had a "revelation" that being dissapointed in not getting what I wanted, was selfish ... it was "not motherly" Having kids (like you know) change your life, you suddenly live for another person ... and the dissapointmet faded and healed in the knowledge that now I am a MOTHER, I may not have given birth to her vaginally, but I could care for her just the same. That saying "a mom is born with a baby" to me, IMO, is cr@p ... a mom become a mom when she get that BFP. By the time your baby are born, you've been a mom for 9 months. It's a lot to get your mind around, but once I did ... I felt better. I get it's a big deal ... it's not everyday a little person is suppose to come out your vagina, but just because it does not happen like that, does NOT make you any less a mother/woman.

Have to add ... this did not happen overnight ... I still get my days when I am mad about not getting labour pains ect ... but I'm the type of person that can "store and deal later"

I should have sought a second opinion but I was too emotionally vulnerable at the time, especially after being told, wrongly, that there was a high chance my baby was going to be born damaged.

Do not beat yourself up on that, that you did not get a second opinion. We trust the ppl we trust when we trust them - make sense?? I know how it feels to just be numb, because you are being told that there might be something wrong with your baby. (they thought my baby would have brain damage as my plasenta did not supply enough blood - I was horrified and scared and cried for the two days leading up to my visit to the speciallist) You don't THINK to get a second opinion, you just FEEL. I get you are extreamly dissapointed in your ob .. in yourself for trusting him ... but you did the best you could with the information you were given.
You had two babies, right? Did this happen with the first? How was the second one born?

Same goes for you Spice ... you trusted your ob, because it was your fist and honestly, no matter how much you read up it's not going to make you a medical profesional to contradict what is being told to you ... by your OB. And your totally right, we can't change the past. We can only live for the future and that is by living for your kids and getting this type of support to deal with our emotions.

Like your idea of a maternal assisted c/s ... I also had a long list of stuff I want the ob to do for this c/s ... but then again I've learn the first time around that things don't always go as planned, so I'm flexible. To be totally honest .. I have so much trust in my ob that if he wants me under ga again, I won't even think twice. He not only has my best intrest at heart, but that of my baby.

To be honest, my pregnancy with DS, is what i think helped me deal with it a bit better.

Me too. I saw this pg in a new light, had all that old feelings come back and dealt with them in a "sober" state of mind. Honestly, a new mum should not be dealing with birth-dissapointment ... it's one of life's cruel little games

PS: I know what you mean about freaking out about the spinal. I will never forget that horrible shooting nerve pain I felt every time the anaesthetist hit bone

*lalalalalalalala* Did not want to hear that I'm scared of needles so getting that spinal will be tought on me

Lot of talking from me BIG cyber hugs to you all.

[~mamaspice~]

So I went in to have my c/s the next morning. I had the epidural put in and it didnt work, I wasnt offered a spinal block at all. My XP was ushered out of the room and I went to sleep crying in the mask. I woke up 3 hours later to find that I had a baby. One minute I was pregnant the next minute I wasnt. I also bled out so I didnt really get to bond with DS until the next day even.

I was very much looking forward to labour, stupid I know, but i wanted to feel that, to go through that and to get to hear my DS cry, feel him come from my body and hold him for the first time while he was still icky.

Mis_tree to you sweetie. Your experience and feelings about it are so similar to mine. Thankyou for sharing your story too.

[~mamaspice~]

just ing this thread up

Just wondering, were any of you guys given a reason for the epi/spinal not working? I had xrays which showed that I have hyperlordosis (or something like that) which explains why they had so much trouble trying to ge the epi in, but doesn't explain why I only started going numb down one side.

[nic]

No, no reason given. My OB with DS said that sometimes it just doesn't? and I would be really unlucky for it to happen with DS. Opted for the GA with DS, so didn't get to find out

[~mamaspice~]

Just came across this old thread of mine and thought I'd it up in case there is anyone else out there who might like to share their experience.

[soulful]

Hi all

What a great thread...!

I have just been told that I may need to go under GA for my upcoming c/s due to major placenta previa. I will be seeing my ob tomorrow to discuss further and express my concerns, but I must admit that I am glad that I have had time to come to terms with this. In the end, I figure the safest way for bubs and me is the best way!

Ofcourse I would much prefer an epi or a spinal and I will be discussing further with my ob tomorrow as to the reason for a GA.

Does anyone have any experiences with going under for placenta previa, or even know the reasons why?

Also, can anyone clarify how long the general lasts for?

TIA

[~mamaspice~]

Hi Soulful,

Best wishes for your upcomming birth. It will be interresting to see what your Ob says tomorrow. I can only gather that perhaps they'd prefer to do a general in case there are any probs during the op because of the praevia. Hopefully they can give you a spinal/epi instead.

My only advice to you is if you do end up with a general and you are concerned with how you might feel about it afterwards talk to your OB about what things they might be able to do to help normalise the birth so-to-speak. I know that if I had to have another general I'd want bubs birth filmed so that I could see it and hear his/her first cries etc. I'd want the placenta kept so it could be shown to me (these things interest me but might make you squeamish) I'd want bub wrapped up in a blanket that had my scent on it and I'd want bub given to me for skin to skin as soon as I woke up in recovery.

As for the length of the general, I think I woke up in Recovery about 45 min to an hour after bub was born.

keep us posted on what your Ob says.