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Thread: I don't feel ready for him to go to childcare...

  1. #19

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    Charlie did a whole day on Tues (7.30am to 4pm) and was shattered when DH picked him up, and did have a cry and a cling when he saw his daddy. Broke my heart when DH told me about it. But tomorrow he's going again, as I've only got a couple of months until he has to go 4 full days anyway. I hope he's better tomorrow.

    Dianna, good luck for next year, hun. Michelle, hope Alex goes great his first full day!


  2. #20

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    2 steps forward 1 step back - isn't that what they say?? - good luck Sushee , I know how you feel

  3. #21

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    Another update from me

    When I broke a bone in my foot last week, DH had to take Charlie to and from childcare. Also instead of the 8.30am to 3pm he was doing, he had to stay the whole day 7.30am to 4.00pm. The first day went well at drop off but when DH went to pick him up, he burst into tears when he saw his dad, like I mentioned before.

    Then on Friday when DH dropped him off, he clung to his dad, and cried when his dad left. Less than 15 mins later, when the carer was changing his nappy, he threw up all over himself. He then dissolved into tears and wouldn't let anyone comfort him. They called me and DH went to collect him. The whole weekend, his tummy was a funny (we even had the most explosive poo I'd ever seen come out of a person, not just a child) and he was very clingy with me and wouldn't let his dad near him even. But by yesterday he seemed back to normal.

    So today I took him back to childcare. The minute we got there, he grabbed onto me like a vice, and when we got in to the room, he started chucking the biggest tanty! I kissed him and left him in the arms of the carer, but have called them 3 or 4 times since, and apparently he's not settling down. Not only that. he won't let anyone comfort him.

    I REEEEEEAAAAALLLLY want to pick him up but both my DH and the childcare director reckons he's going to have to cry this one out. They reckon someone's always with him, and every now and then he forgets that he's upset and plays for a bit. Then he remembers and starts screaming again.

    This childcare centre has an excellent reputation, and I know he's going to have to start there full time in on January 8th, but right now I just want to quit work, live like a pauper, and be with my son!!

    I'm going to call them again, I think. This is doing my head in!

  4. #22

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    Awwwwwww Sush, I cant tell you how much that brings me to tears!!! Your not at all a bad Mummy, I so understand that he needs to go to C/care & you need to work... But it just hurts that some kids dislike it (probably only for the moment) next week he'll probably love it again!

    Indah disliked her second carer & I wasnt 100% happy with her in the last few wks, but i knew I was about to start mat leave! If I wasnt I'd have changed her....

    Big smooshy hugs to you!!!! Send Charlie here to live with me!!! (my MIL always suggests we send the kids to bali for her to look after!)

  5. #23

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    Aw Tracey,

    if we lived close by I'd rather my $250+ a week went to you to look after my baby boy! I can just imagine him best of friends with Indah and adoring Zyon and Maddy.

    TBH he actually seemed to like the girls there the times I've brought him. I think he just now realised that it's a regular thing and he wants his mummy. And I want him!

    Apparently he's calm now, but still not happy.

  6. #24

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    You poor bugger! I know 1 time Indah was hysterical when i left her & I sobbed all the way to work... I called the woman as soon as i was in m y office & I could hear Indah playing but doing that yucky crying noise, like she couldnt ctach her breathe! I called my boss & lied & I went home & picked her up & we laid on the bed reading books all day & she slept in my arms!!! I just couldnt bare it!!!!

  7. #25

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    I'm feeling that way too. As time is going on I'm getting more and more agitated. I am thinking that I'm going to just go get him now, but will give the centre one more call before I take off.

    ETA he's asleep, so they've asked me to hang off for a couple of hours. <sigh> I suppose it's a good thing that he's had a sleep. They reckon he's been patchy, with good times and not so good times. I'll go down there at 1pm to pick him, I think.
    Last edited by sushee; November 20th, 2007 at 12:16 PM.

  8. #26

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    OOOh I hope he is happy to see you!!! Then next time is better/easier!

  9. #27

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    Smile everything will be fine

    I've worked in long day care for 12 years and I am blessed to have worked in a community based centre which has treated staff exceptionally well and provided us with the tools to provide fantastic care for our children.
    I've been back at work nearly a year in January and to be honest when my return date arrived I cried myself to sleep!!! how could I be seperated from my princess when I delight in her every waking moment and her achievements. Paige was 8mths old when I had to return due to financial reasons.
    She loved it from day one, I was the one with the seperation problems and the mother guilt.
    She adores her carers to the point that if we run in to them in town after hours she leaves me with arms outstretched and gives them hugs she normally reserves for her mummy and daddy in the mornings.
    She suprises me reguarly with things that she has learnt in care and my hubby and I look at each other in amazement and say "oh, they must have done it at daycare!!"
    They are really careful not to giveaway milestones though and will hint that "Paige is so nearly walking" rather than telling you "oh, she took a few steps today"
    It does get easier and it will help you when you see your child enjoying their time in care and making friends and bonds with their carers.
    Paige has developed amazing relationships with her young friends and will hug and kiss them on arrival in the morning(and frequently through out the day apparently)
    best of luck with it I'm sure everything will be fine but like everything in life their will be times when it is hard and that mummy guilt is a killer.
    Allie xxxx

  10. #28

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    oh, I just wanted to add in all honesty I've had many experiences with seperation on arrival and have seen agonised parents leaving their screaming children, total heart break material.
    I have also seen the seperation become easier over time even children that have been having troubles for months will settle in all of a sudden and be excited about their time in care.
    all I can advise you is to keep up with it, develop good lines of communication with your child's carers if they are like me the welfare of the children in my care are my first and most important interest and you will need their support and reassurance on the times that you are really struggling
    with it, It really does become easier in time it doesn't make it feel any easier in the short term though((hugs))Allie xx

  11. #29

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    Aww Sushee, I hope things have picked up for you. I read your post as my own little one is starting full time care in less than 2 weeks. I'm crossing my fingers that because he's so much younger he will accept it as being normal all the time.

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