PP - I remember your original post about this, and seriously, I cannot believe that you got hate messages for it. People should learn to keep their opinions to themselves if they are not walking in your shoes. JMO of course.
I have DS in daycare two days a week, and not currently working (obviously) I love the days he is in there. Like today, I got to vac and wash the floors - it had been ages since they had been done, and I so love the fact that I can bond with Mehkelti, like I did with him when he was a newborn ya know???
I wouldn't have him in daycare less than two days a week, just because its a long week between visits IYKWIM?
But tis up to you hon, and if you get hate messages from this - send the biatches my way and I will deal with them!!!!
PP- My DS goes to CC one day a week ATM (He only started a couple of months ago). I was also told he would have trouble settling. He does cry when I drop him off but stops straight away when I leave (I've checked ). He has settled well and is happy when I pick him up.
I work full-time but am lucky enough for my mum to care for him on other days. I decided to send him for social reasons and keep him busy (also to take pressure off my mum). I am happy with my decision and will probably increase to two days next year.
GL with your decision
Hun, I think that using child care one day a week is a great idea. I do believe that it is good for most children (not all), as they get a different type of socialisation and different activities. I also think it's good for children to have a mum who isn't totally exhausted and has nothing to give. Having been pg with a toddler, and also having a nb and a toddler, all I can say to is that you will benefit from the break and you will be a better mummy to both your beautiful children for doing this.
Jack had been in day care while I was working, and I changed him down to 1 day a week at a different centre when I went on maternity leave for Tom (which turned out to be when Tom was born as he arrived 4 weeks early). Jack did take longer to settle into the new centre as it was only day a week. I think that 2 days would have helped him settle in more quickly. But he did settle in, and he wasn't too upset. If you can afford it, and bring yourself to do it, maybe you could start her at 2 days a week just for 3 or 4 weeks and then drop her back. But even if you just go with 1 day, she will settle in. In between kindy days, you can be talking to her about what she does at kindy, and doing some of the same activities (even role-playing role call, morning tea time etc - Jack loves doing this). That would help her settle in more quickly too.
I HTH hun. Please don't feel guilty. This is a good idea, and your DD will be just fine.
i haven't read all the responses... but i started a similar thread to this not long ago, something about childcare and socialisation.... i too did some research and also read that kids only going one day wouldn't transition as well as others doing 2+ days etc etc... i have two retired parents who mind my dd (16 months) three days a week, i didn't actually NEED to use childcare, but i just thought dd would maybe benefit from going...
in the end i decided against it, after dd getting sick after EVERY session at playgroup, i just thought how much worse it would be at childcare.... also i found some interesting material opposing parents trying to 'socialise' their babies through childcare.... it gave me a lot to think about and i decided she was too young for me to be expecting her to be 'social', IYKWIM.... we go to playgroup reasonably regularly, and she has gone from being a clingy baby, to a pretty well adjusted toddler running about playing...
if you google childcare for socialisation etc you might find the stuff i came across... it was dead against it in babies this young (for the reason of clingy-ness/socialisation).... anyways obviously if you NEED childcare thats a different story... i know lots of kids thrive in childcare and have nothing against it, and maybe one day dd will go when she is older, but i think its important its used for the right reasons - you're little girl is clingy cos she wants her mum, thats perfect natural and normal, give her a couple of months she might surprise you and come out of her shell..... is there a playgroup you can go to? i found the difference between my dd from say 13 months, to 15 months HUGELY significant - she really came into her own.
anyways good luck im sure you'll work out whats best for you xx
I tried to get DD2 into daycare one day a week when DS was 3 weeks old, just for a break, but there was no room in the under 3's room.
So as soon as she turned 3 we went over & finished her enrolment & she's been going every Thursday ever since. She loves it & I get one day a week with DS alone.
Its good for all of us.
DD2 gets to interact with other kids her age & has LOADS of fun & I get a break.
I have NO family around at all & That is the only time I get with out all the kids around fighting for my attention.
DD2 is 3, so adjusted pretty easy. DD1 started going occasionally when she was 15 months. She went for 3 months, then started again when she was 2 one day a week.
I was SAHM then & am now, but I think the kids need time with other kids.
& mums need time out to scratch their bums & shave their legs!!
No way do I think you're lazy!
Darcy is in ATM because I work, but in a few short months I won't be and I have no plans to change her going.
I aslo like that it is bolstering her immunity to stuff we wouldn't normally come into contact with (different spin on the snotty nosed kids thing if it helps).
We just started sending DD to daycare the other week and I spose we don't really *have* to. My mum has looked after Natty on my work days for the last 6 months. And FIL has had her on occasion too. But it became a hassle when mum planned to go on holidays etc, so I decided to just send her - seemed much easier to do so.
I've got her in two days/week, so can't comment on the one day/week thing. We're still adjusting/settling in
I don't think you're lazy at all. I have noticed a change in Natty already. She is heaps more confident with the other kids at playgroup (she used to rarely let me out of her sight, and would often cling to my leg the whole time. And this is the mothers' group we've been with since she was 3 months old!) Now she is comfortable for a bit longer, though she still likes to have regular contact with me. So the social aspect of it has already been a big plus for her.
And the snotty nose thing... You just can't escape it, Babes. She'll get sick. But it's gotta happen sometime.
DD started preschool this year and although i felt guilty at first because I'm on mat leave at the moment, it is the BEST thing we've ever done. She LOVES it. She is a very energetic, active little girl and when DS arrived i just felt like she wasn't getting the time, attention, stimulation, interaction etc that she needed. She goes 1.5 days a week (preschool closes at lunch time on Thursdays) and next year I'm considering putting her in another day in preparation for school the following year, she loves it that much.
She was 3 though and I was very lucky, despite her never being in care before we've not had a single tear or even a hesitation. The first day I came back to pick her up she stood at the fence and yelled at me to get back in the car and go home - OK, it's funny now, but it broke my heart at the time! LOL. I went into it with the plan that if it was distressing for either of us (mainly her! LOL) we would take her straight out and try again next year.
The main reason I did it was for her, but I must admit I love having those days with just me and DS. I feel like he's getting my undevoted attention and I can just enjoy him without having to chase DD around. As well as the advantages others have mentioned like getting groceries done or just putting DS in the pram and hitting the shops - much easier with one child than two.
The illness thing does suck though...she's been sick more often in the last 6 months than in her entire life. Worse than that though is she brings it home and DS gets it too. He's up to cold #5....DD didn't get sick at all until she was about 18 months old. So that's sucked, but it's the one negative.
Last edited by Willow; August 15th, 2008 at 09:25 PM.
I think why not give it a go - if it doesn't work out at least you gave it a go. DD loves her childcare and I will be keeping her in 2 days a week when I go on maternity leave for a number of reasons - to keep her place, to give me a break and to allow me to spend 1 on 1 time with the new baby.
I don't think you are lazy at all - I work a 7 day fortnight (3 days one week, 4 days the next) but DD is looked after 4 days a week so once a fortnight I get a child-free day. I need it for my sanity, the house gets a proper clean and I can do things like go to the hairdresser, doctor, OB, dentist etc.. which are impossible to do with a 2 year old. It's hard work bringing up kids, running a house and working!
1 day a week can work if you manage a good routine around it. DD goes to childcare at the gym for an hour before her swimming lesson once a week and she has done since she was 9 months old - I go to the gym and then pick he up for her swim. She has her routine down pat and knows that every Friday is gym and swim day. It just depends how you structure the rest of your week.
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). He has settled well and is happy when I pick him up.
- OK, it's funny now, but it broke my heart at the time! LOL. I went into it with the plan that if it was distressing for either of us (mainly her! LOL) we would take her straight out and try again next year.
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