Hello ladies,

I thought as many of us are heading to the final stage of pregnancy you may have already been thinking or looking into this topic and might be able to share your findings so far.

Basically there is a good chance that my little one is a boy and now this has become more than academic for me. So far I have told DH that we will sit down and talk after both of us has had a chance to come to our own conclusions and provide more than just ideas.

The reason for this is that so far I have had the following opinions/arguments given:

Pro:

DH "I've had it done and I'm fine", "It looks better", "He will enjoy sex more later on"

DH's Mum "The Dr's just take the baby and do it, you don't even here them crying", "It has to be done or they get infections and then it has to be done anyway", "It was right for my boys [basically translated to that was my decision, you should do the same]"

Con:

My Mum "Boys can learn to keep themselves clean, no harder than little girls", "Sensitivity of un snipped men is more so, ie more sensation durring sex", "Your father is and brother isn't and neither of them have self esteem issues - makes little difference in the long run"

Family Precidents:

One uncle as a little boy did what little boys do and put it into a chain and ripped of the top - if he had been circumsised he would have lost the tip of the penis as opposed to the foreskin.

Another uncle was and the Dr stuffed it up - suffered erection issues and associated pain. Long term problems with intimacy.

Finally I have another uncle who is an Emergnecy Trauma Surgeon who pointed out to my mum when it was about my brother just how often the foreskin is used to patch up really bad wounds etc. If its gone then you loose a valuable natural skin patch should it be needed.

My position:

I respect my DH and know that his bond with his son is important so I am inclined to take his views seriously. However this is my baby and I do not what to do something that could harm or hinder them, for crying out loud I would never consider altering the genitals of my daughter for what appears to be cosmetic reasoning on his families side.

No one in my family follows a faith that requires this to take place - so thats one less reason. In fact my personal beliefs are more in line with this child is born as it is, imperfectly perfect - like everyone of us.

As for what looks good or not etc I can not honestly say the only boy bits I have been on any real terms with are DH's and I can't say him being snipped or not would change a darnned thing about our relationship. So I really can't even draw on experience here.

As you can imagine I have been avoiding this talk long enough, it does need to happen. Please know that even though I may be one way more than the other I really do want a wide range of opinions so that I can know I have looked at this properly.

If you have any links to info or reports/studies you know about please pass them on.

Thankyou,

Diana