This may sound a bit out there, but do you do the same play every night after dinner? It takes DS a good 2-3 hours before he winds down! This is our routine:

Daddy comes home.
Daddy and DS have cuddle and chat/play.
Daddy feeds fish, DS watches.
Mummy cooks dinner - sometimes DS has a cooking lesson, sometimes sits on Daddy's knee at the computer (I know, not ideal).
Family dinner time and conversation (finished away from the table with Mummy)
Naked time
Bath time
Massage dry, nightwear on, say Good Night to Daddy
Story (now with bottle feed)
Prayers (with breast feed)
Lullaby
If DS falls asleep at the breast, straight into bed. Otherwise he's lullaby'd, given a kiss and told goodnight and left. I hum quietly outside the door if he starts to get unsettled, but go in if he cries. Then it's walking up and down to the lullaby.